The Mermaid of Panem
by LilyBug95
Summary: Anwyn Cresta became the mermaid of Panem when she won the 70th Hunger Games but before that she was a simple happy girl from district 4 that was chosen to play in their games and fight for her life. Her beauty captivated Panem, her love belonged to her mentor, her triumph would mean losing everything. Before the girl on fire there was the Mermaid of Panem.
1. Chapter 1

My life wasn't perfect, but who can say they've had a perfect life? There used to be a time where my smile was true, where I didn't smirk, where my laugh didn't come out forced. I was never vain nor arrogant but who would sponsor a 15 year old girl that had a heart that never cared for her looks, a girl that never wanted to kill other innocent children. I used to be happy with what I had, never once did I wish for more, I once believed luck had been on my side until the day the odds turned against me.

As a baby I had been found by the sea all alone with only a necklace around my neck, a pearl attached to the end of the chain. The couple that found me and claimed me as their own, they named me Anwyn, child of the sea it meant, I always loved my name until the day it was called. In District 4 I would be known as the mermaid, the child that was brought by the sea but to the capitol I would become _**their mermaid**_, I would never return to the sea nor would I swim free they captured me with a net and put me up for display. I once had a family, a father that always told me I was his little girl even though I truly wasn't his, a doting loving mother that loved me as though she had birthed me, and my two sisters, Marina and Coral. My little sisters oh how I miss them, how I wish I had seen them grow, to see them love, to swim and lay on the sand as we once had. But they had never truly been my family and the capitol made sure I knew that as they took them from me.

I thought the day I was reaped was the worst day of my life but how wrong I was. The day I won was the day I lost everything ''_winning'' _would be my worst mistake. The games did bring me something or rather_** someone**_, he would become my guide through my dark tunnel, he'd teach me to survive, but most of he'd teach me that love could be found even in the darkest of places. No my life wasn't perfect, but what victor can say their life is? When you win…no when you survive the games no one tells you the real games are just about to begin and all you can do is smile for the cameras and hope one day the games will finally end.

I survived the 70th Hunger Games, I was 15 when I became a killer, I did what I had to do to get back to my family to go home, I was 16 when everything was taken from me, the girl on fire isn't the only one with a story. I'll give you the story of a little girl that knew love, loss, and most of all she knew how to _**survive.**_ I'm Anwyn Cresta and here is the story of a little mermaid that became a puppet with the capitol pulling the strings


	2. Chapter 2

'' Ouch!'' I screech as my mother pins my hair down to perfection.

'' Oh don't be a child Annie, we're almost done…'' she says as I hiss at the sting I feel on my scalp.

I sigh in frustration wanting the harassment my head was taking to be over but looking your best when you could be chosen to represent your district was very important. Today was Reaping Day and children ages 12 through 18 had to dress to impress just in case the odds were not in their favor. I was lucky to come from District 4 we had many victors and well trained careers and out of the twelve districts we always had better chances in the games just like 1 and 2. But just because we came from a career district didn't mean we loved the thought of killing brutally and sending our children as sacrifices for the capitol. I shake my head a thought like that could result in treason and me becoming an avox.

'' Don't move, I'm…almost…DONE!'' my mother says happily as she places the last pin in my hair. '' Here let me look at you,''

I stand from my chair and face her; she gasps and smiles her warm smile.

'' oh, you're so beautiful my darling,'' she says softly her voice sad just like her beautiful green eyes.

'' Don't be sad mama I'll be fine, the odds have been in my favor so far,'' I say giving her a brave smile, I hadn't lied to her, so far luck had been on my side at 15 I hadn't been chosen only three more years to go.

'' I know, I just…can't help but think,'' she tries saying but her voice comes out as a sob

'' oh mama please don't, you have to be brave this is Marina's first reaping, she's terrified,'' I say hugging her once more, '' besides my names only in their 4 times and Marina only has 1 the odds are good don't fret.''

My mother gives me a small laugh as she pulls away from our embrace, '' How did you come to be so grown up that now you're the one calming me?'' she says touching my cheek.

'' I learned from you,'' I whisper

'' you're right no more tears,'' she says wiping the tears from her face and turns from me calling my sisters, '' Marina! Coral! Hurry we can't be late!''

'' we're coming,'' Marina says as she rounds the door Coral close behind her.

Marina and Coral were the opposite of me both had red hair, sun kissed skin, and green eyes just one look at them and me you'd know that we weren't truly sisters by blood. My black hair that always flowed in curls, white skin, and exotic looking eyes always separated me from the rest of district 4 some say it was because I had been birth by the sea silly stories had followed me from the moment I had been found floating on the water.

'' Annie you look so pretty,'' Coral's small eight year old voice rings through the room so innocently as if today wasn't a tragic day as if there was nothing to fear and for her there wasn't at least not until she turned twelve.

I smile and walk up to her kneeling in front of her and fix a fallen piece of hair placing it behind her ear as I speak to her,'' you look even more pretty than me Coral but thank you,'' and then I turn to Marina who's eyes are covered in fear as she stands stoically by the door frame.

'' And you are the most pretty of them all Marina, look at you this dress suits you better than it did on me,'' I tell her tapping her nose.

She laughs and shakes her head,'' you're a thousand times prettier than me Annie and mama had to pin the dress on me.''

'' beauty is more than just a face Marina and even if it wasn't I know you are just as beautiful if not more than me, now don't fight your older sister I'm more mature and know more than you,'' I say teasing her.

Marina and Coral giggle as I tickle them both while our parents look fondly at as from the kitchen. '' You just turned fifteen Anne, you're not that old,'' Coral laughs wrapping her arms around me.

'' Well then we can just base my knowledge on who's taller,'' I say as I stand to my full height of 5'4 I was a little short but to them I was still taller, '' and look at that I'm the tallest,''

'' no fair,'' they whine but their eyes shine with girlish happiness that wasn't there just a few moments ago as they feared the reaping.

''Alright my girls time to go,'' my father says from behind our mother smiling so proudly at us leading us to the door when I hear mama shriek.

'' oh wait, Annie you forgot your necklace,'' she says running to place it around my neck. '' Perfection,''

I smile as I twirl my necklace between my fingers, it was the only thing I had from my previous life, a pearl hanging from a beautifully crafted chain it had been around my neck when my father found me as a baby. I thank mama as I feel the necklace hang around my neck neatly as it always does.

'' Alright lets go,'' father says leading us through the door and towards the Justice Building where the reaping took place.

When we finally reached the town square we say our goodbyes and that we would meet after the reaping was over, grabbing onto Marina's hand I lead her to the registration. As we wait for our turns I feel Marina shiver and fighting to breathe.

'' Marina, it's okay, breathe Marina, just breathe, they're going to take a little bit of blood, don't worry starfish you won't be chosen your name is only in their once,'' I try calming her

'' Annie I'm scared,'' she cries

'' No don't be scared if your picked, listen to me Marina I swear to you I will volunteer in your place I promise,'' I say holding her face to mine.

'' no Annie you can't,'' she says

'' Of course I can but I won't need to because you won't be picked,'' I finish placing a kiss on her forehead.

'' Next,'' the woman at registration says impatiently.

''Go Marina, I'll find you after, okay?'' I say pushing her towards the desk as I go to another.

The woman at the desk grabs my hand roughly and pricks my finger, dabbing the blood into her book and then I'm ushered into the fifteen year old female section. I stand between to other girls that I recognize from school they don't like me much mother says they're jealous of my beauty I scoff were looks really that important to some? I look around the Justice Building searching for Marina when my eyes catch a set of bright green eyes they were extremely gorgeous and belonged to the one and only Finnick Odair. Finnick was our last victor he won the 65th Hunger Games at only fourteen and became the youngest in history to win, he was extremely handsome you had to be blind not to notice but I've never cared about looks, to me he was arrogant and vain. Besides why would I just want to be a number to him or another notch on his bedframe? I kept my eyes blank as he continues to study me, we've never talked more than a simple ''good morning,'' or '' hello'' when he brought a trident to be fixed at my father's shop.

His eyes finally waver when Mags another District 4 victor from many years ago pats him on the knee trying to get his attention, he reluctantly turns away from me acknowledging the old victor and whom I know to be his old mentor.

'' Finnick Odair was looking at you,'' one of the girls hisses at me while the other glares.

I ignore them and continue to look towards the victors they range from old to young, from senile to drunk, beautiful to scarred we have a total of sixteen living victors but after Odair won the odds haven't been so good they say he can mentor to save his life but I say he's just to young he's only nineteen how could he mentor children when he wasn't completely an adult yet.

I notice our mayor he sits proudly in the center sweating in his suit under the harsh sunlight and to his right is our escort the ever annoying Vivia Vaduh she's just as horrid as her name. She's completely covered in a blues and greens, her heels seem to be made of pearls, her makeup and hair are the worst pieces of her attire. Her hair this year is light blue with a large starfish and shell adorning the wig while her face is too white to be natural and her lips are blue she almost seems dead. How ridiculous these capitol people dress just as ridiculous as they talk I think to myself.

When the clock strikes three o'clock we all turn to the stage where Vivia jumps in glee coming to stand next to the mayor who now stands in front of the microphone as the cameras begin rolling. The mayor gives us the usual speech of Panem's history, how before Panem there was nothing but destruction until the capitol _''saved us''_ with thirteen serving districts. But the districts rebelled and the result was the annihilation of district 13 and as a reminder of the capitol's power, each district must offer up one female and one male between the ages of twelve through eighteen to be trained and face off an arena. Winning means bringing honor to our district and losing means certain death.

A small applause is heard when the mayor is done speaking and silence follows when Vivia walks to center stage. She stands in the middle of two table each has a glass bowl with the names of the tributes one contains the females the other the males that bowl holds the fate of a poor child unless another volunteers in their place. We haven't had volunteers for two years now seeing as the tributes we send have been killed off brutally; I've heard some careers say they would volunteer when Odair was no longer allowed to mentor.

Vivia finally grabs the microphone and shrieks in her horrible high pitched voice, '' Happy Hunger Games! And may the odds be ever in your favor,'' she says dramatically, '' Mr. Mayor my I just say your speech was just inspiring was it not?''

No one says anything we just stare at her like fish ready for the frying pan quite literally.

'' well then let us begin, the time has come to select another pair of strong courageous tributes to represent District 4 with honor and pride in the 70th Hunger Games, as always ladies first.''

She approaches the female bowl and dramatically pulls out a name, my heart races as she walks to the microphone ready to read the name of the chosen tribute. I silently beg in my head for it not to be Marina not my little sister.

_Please don't let it be Marina_

_Not Marina_

_Don't call Marina_

'' Anwyn Cresta!'' she cries

I smile in relief she didn't call Marina but suddenly all the girls turn to me and I know I won't have to volunteer for my little sister because I was the female tribute, I was chosen. I guess I finally ran out of luck.

I hear the cries of my family my father holding my mother tightly as she tries to run to me, but I feel frozen as I walk towards the stage flocked by peacekeepers. My face is blank of emotion but I'm sure if anyone looked in my eyes they would see fear and panic. As I finally reach the steps i hear a gasp.

'' oh my, well aren't you just beautiful my dear,'' Vivia screeches as she pulls me up on stage she then turns to Finnick and speaks loudly for everyone to hear, '' I think you have competition Finny darling she's a looker!''

Finnick smirks at Vivia and throws a wink at me and in his usual arrogant silky voice says,'' Hello beautiful come here often?'' The crowd laughs I simply raise my eyebrow at his stupid comment and face the crowd I see Marina her face tear streaked I give her a reassuring smile on the outsides of the ropes I see my parents with Coral they all shake their heads as if trying to erase what has just happened.

'' well now as custom I will ask for volunteers, do any of you wish to take pretty Anwyn's place?'' Vivia asks the crowd but there is no answer I knew there wouldn't be girls have never liked me they would never give their life in exchange for mine. I see someone step forward, no its Marina I shake my head telling her no giving her a glare for affect I would never allow her to volunteer.

''Well then seeing as there are no volunteers I give you your female tribute Anwyn Cresta!'' she says cheerfully,'' and now on to the boys!''

I don't pay attention after that, until I feel a hand shake my own I finally look up and see a boy that was built like a tank I had seen him around town, his father was a fisherman and he with his mother sold the fish at the street market. I remembered bits about him his name was Lake, he was an only child, a career, and sadly this was his last year of eligibility. But I couldn't worry about him I had myself to worry about.

After we shake hands and Vivia congratulates us we are rushed off stage and into the Justice Building to say our final goodbyes. I don't want to say goodbye, I'm not ready, no the odds were not in my favor but they were in Marina's and that's all I wanted.


	3. Chapter 3

**I own nothing just my characters**

Peacekeepers take me into a beautifully decorated room where my family will say their goodbyes to me before I get on the train, as I wait for my family to be brought in I look around the luxurious room. So here's where the capitols luxuries begin I think to myself as I trace the pattern on the chair where I sit, I suddenly hear the door being open and I quickly stand when I see my mother's beautiful face.

'' You have five minutes,'' the peacekeeper says before he shuts the door.

As soon as the door is shut I run into my mother's waiting arms she sobs the moment I cling onto her wanting to hide in her arms as I once did when I was a child.

'' Oh my sweet Anwyn, my baby girl,'' she cries

'' mommy,'' I whimper but I don't allow myself to cry I can't let her see my fear I must be brave I tell myself.

She pulls away from our embrace and grabs me by my upper arms looking me straight in the eye, '' you have to survive Anwyn, use everything you have,'' she says

''mom…''

'' no listen to me Anwyn you're beautiful let the capitol see that if they do they'll sponsor you, you heard Vivia if she says you're competition for Finnick Odair then the capitol will see that too,'' she continues.

'' mom beauty won't help…''

'' it helped Odair and if he can do it so can you the capitol loves pretty things be cute, coy, innocent let them fall for you.''

I stare at her in silence not knowing what to say.

'' Anwyn promise me you will do everything to win, everything, ''she sobs

'' I promise ill come home,'' I whisper

She smiles at me and pulls me into a final hug as the door is swung open,'' you need to win Anwyn do it for us my little mermaid,'' she says as she is pulled away by the peacekeeper

'' I love you,'' I say before she is pulled away

'' I love you too my sweet girl always,'' and with that the door is closed and I'm left once again alone.

A minute later the door opens again and in come my sisters running to hug me, I cling onto them not wanting to let go. They cry into my dress and it's me that has to comfort them as I run my hands through their hair.

'' shhh…it's okay, I'll be fine I promise,'' I whisper into their heads

'' Annie you have to win,'' they both sob

'' I'll try,'' I say

'' No!'' Marina says pulling away from me,'' No Annie you have to win promise us,''

I've never seen Marina so outspoken she's usually so shy and quiet but this isn't that girl, the girl in front of me is glaring me down she seems older and not so childlike anymore. I grab her and pull her for another hug,'' I promise,'' I say. When I pull away I look down at Coral who seems as though she's cried for days the smile she had in the morning long gone. I kneel in front of her and take her small hands in mine wiping away the tears from her face.

'' Everything's going to be fine okay, don't cry for me, I promise I'll come back you just have to be brave,'' I say to her holding back my tears.

'' I don't want you to go,'' she cries

'' I know but I'll be home soon,'' I tell her running my hand through her braid.

'' you…promise,'' she whimpers

'' I promise but you have to promise me something too,'' I say trying to smile

'' anything,'' she says

'' you're going to be brave, pay attention in school, and eat your vegetables, okay?'' I tell her.

'' I promise,'' she says crying into my shoulder.

'' no more tears then, be brave.'' I say kissing her forehead.

The door once again begin to open and I hug them both as they cry, '' don't forget how much I love you both, do everything mama and papa say.''

I feel them nod their heads and then they are pulled away by the peacekeeper as they try to cling onto me.

'' I love you both, don't forget me,'' I yell as they are taken from me shouting for me.

I collapse onto the chair wanting to sob how could I keep my promise, how could I come back? It isn't long before my father enters he's my last visitor, he opens his arms as he always did so me and my sisters could jump into them. I finally let out a sob and run into his strong arms muscled after years of fishing and fixing weapons.

'' daddy,'' I cry as he holds me running his hand down my back trying to soothe me as mama had done ,'' I can't do this, I can't win.''

Suddenly I'm pulled back roughly and I see his usually gentle face hard and stoic his eyes bright and angry.

'' Don't you dare say that Anwyn Cresta, don't ever say those words again, you're going to win I know it!'' he says emphasizing every word.

'' How? I'm not a career,'' I say and it was the truth I had never trained a day in my life, there was never time I always had to help at the shop, or at home, or help papa fish. I took the place of what a son would normally do in their family and in mine seeing as there was only daughters I had to do everything I could to help.

'' you might as well be,'' he says

I look at him in confusion but before I ask he answers.

'' I've taught you how to use a trident and knives, you're fast and strong, Anwyn I know you can fight when it comes down to it and besides those tributes won't be nearly as smart as you,'' he says

'' but I don't know how to fight,'' I whisper

'' you'll learn that's what training is for and I'm sure your mentor will have advice just listen to them. Anne you can win this I know you will, promise me you'll fight,''

'' I promise daddy, I promise,'' I say looking into his eyes.

He pulls me into his arms and kisses my head, '' the day I found you Anwyn was the happiest day of my life, from that moment you were my little girl,'' I feel a tear fall from his face onto my own and I cling onto him harder when just like my sisters he is pulled away.

'' Win Anwyn!'' he shouts, '' Win for us!''

I cry as the door is closed in front of my face my families words running through my head, I lean my head on the door and press my hand to it as if I could feel my family behind it. I feel a tear on my cheek and I angrily wipe it away, I know what I have to do, I needed to win for them and I would tears weren't going to solve anything. I wipe my face free of tears and breathe deeply calming myself, my father was right I might not be a career but I've used weapons and I was fast the fastest in my physical education class. I only had a chance if I believed I did if I fought for it and I would. I fix my dress and practice my smile the games don't begin in the arena I knew that much from watching them all these years, no the games begin the moment you are whisked onto the train. I had to make an impression and perhaps my mother was right my beauty would do that for me, I've never cared for my looks but today would be a good time to care.

I hear the door open once more and in come Vivia her heels clicking loudly on the polished wooden floors she smiles as she catches my eye.

'' All ready dearie?'' she asks

'' yes,'' I say politely giving her a charming smile

She claps her hands and smiles at me in return,'' excellent we have so many things to do, come along we don't want to miss the train.''

I follow her out of the Justice building and into a waiting car where Lake is already sitting looking stoic, he nods in acknowledgement as I get in after Vivia. The drive to the station isn't long for which I'm thankful otherwise I'd rip my hair out if I had to listen to Vivia's voice any longer. The whole outside is swarming with reporters clicking their cameras as we are led onto the train I smile just like I had practiced and practically dance my way onto the train. Lake follows practically stomping his way inside with Vivia on his heels, as soon as the door closes behind Vivia the train lurches forward I look towards the outside of the train and get my last glimpse of my home of my beloved sea. I truly felt like a mermaid taken away from her home to be offered for a _''better cause''_ I sighed as we pulled away from the station when I feel someone to close behind me and soon warm breath tickles my ear.

'' Were you able to say goodbye to all your admirers or was there only time for half,'' a sickeningly sweet voice says from behind me. I turn quickly only to bump into the rock hard chest of Finnick Odair, his face pulled into it's usually playboy look that drives girls crazy just not me.

'' what are you talking about?'' I say trying to move away from him but he won't budge as he stands in front of me keeping me in place.

'' the poor boys that dream about you being their girlfriend one day or did you not see the looks of despair they gave you as you were chosen?'' he teases

'' you must have seen wrong,'' I say, '' now if you would please move so I can go with Vivia,''

'' you would rather be with Vivia than me,'' he says still not moving

'' For a matter of fact I would actually, now move or I'll move you,'' I say glaring at him he wasn't my mentor so I didn't have to be nice, male mentors mentored the male tribute luckily I'd have nothing to do with him.

'' move me?'' he repeats laughing, '' a small thing like you, please.''

I suddenly see red I don't know what people see in him he's so arrogant and cocky just because he knows he's good looking. I use up all my strength pushing myself on the window sill and push him out of my way, I'm happy to see he actually stumbles but it's the look of shear shock on his face that makes me smile. You got that right Odair there's one girl that won't fall for your charm I think. Giving him a sweet smile I walk away swinging my hips to let him know I wasn't affected by his ''_sexiness''_ score one for Annie.

I find Vivia showing Lake into his room when she spots me, '' oh there you are dearie, come come I'll show you into your bedroom.''

I follow quietly behind her listening to her go on about how she knows I'll enjoy all the luxuries the capitol has to offer when I think she won't be able to shut up we finally reach the final door at the end of the train.

'' this is your room,'' she says opening the door and leading me in the room like the train in filled with beautifully crafted furnishings and decorations its grand and spacious. You could fit three of my rooms back home in just this one room, but I rather have my old room with my things than here in this cold cage because that's what it was a cage.

'' Dinner will be served in twenty minutes so hurry and dress the closet is fully stocked have fun with it,'' Vivia says happily as she walks towards the door

'' thank you Vivia,'' I say giving her a charming smile following my mother's advice to woo the capitol citizens.

'' oh you're most welcome dearie,'' she says blowing me a kiss before she walks out.

Once I'm finally alone I collapse on the bed finally feeling the weight of where I am and where I'll be in a few days. I decide to venture around the bedroom and enter the bathroom turning on the lights I see it's just as grand as the bedroom. It's bright and too white for my taste not as charming as the one I decorated with my sisters back home, stepping in front of the mirror I decide to finally take a look at myself.

My reflection shows a tired girl that has too many problems for her young age her beauty is evident but it's her eyes that have me captivated, they're filled with too much emotion that it hurts to look at them. The rest of the girl is just as beautiful dressed in a pretty green dress her body fighting against the material. I practice a Finnick Odair smolder but I end up laughing at the faces I make I wonder if he practices this look in the mirror just like I'm doing. I stop laughing when I look at my hair it's wrapped in what seems to be never ending braids that form a perfect bun with green ribbons braided into it. I touch my hair remembering my mother's soft hands as she tamed my hair to perfection, I shake my head at my thoughts, no I have to think about my plan not cry over my family.

Walking out of the bathroom and move towards the closet it had more clothing than I had ever seen I don't want to wear it but if I want to make an impression I'll wear whatever they give me. I program the computer to give me something comfortable and pretty, an ocean blue sundress appears in front of me in seconds it's beautiful and soft to the touch I think it's silk but I could be wrong. I quickly dress and undress leaving my hair in its style and my flats on my feet when I'm done I look in the floor length mirror next to the door the dress fits me like a glove it falls a little above my knees the sleeves fall off my shoulders in a see through material while a ribbon wraps around my bust. I fix my pearl necklace and smile at the reflection the dress was simple yet I made it seem a thousand times more beautiful, yes I would have to learn that beauty could be a weapon.

'' Dinner!'' I hear Vivia shriek

I sigh as I walk out into the dining room a smile placed on my face as I see everyone already sitting and waiting for me I notice Mags the older victor is here which mean she's my mentor.

'' oh there's our beautiful girl,'' Vivia shrieks, '' come, come sit!''

I do as I'm told and sit but to my luck the only empty seat is next to Odair who pats the chair and smirks at me. I fall gracefully onto the chair ignoring him instead looking around the table, Lake is eating what seems to be some sort blue soup and a piece of bread ignoring everyone, I notice the many types of foods and drinks laid out as if it were a feast. Vivia pours me what looks to be red soup telling me I just had to try it after I thank her I look down at all the silver ware not knowing which spoon to use.

'' you start from the outside and make your way in,'' Finnick whispers to close to my ear disturbing my debate.

I turn my gaze to him, he's smiling, his lips curved into a devious smile. Is he mocking me? I furrow my eyebrow but do as he tells me.

'' thank you,'' I whisper turning to my food

I sip my soup showing my good manners as I make my way through the five courses while I listen to Vivia tell us about the capitol when she turns her attention to me.

'' Anwyn I was wondering dearie, how old are you, I don't recall what your age was,'' Vivia questions as she finishes her bite.

'' I'm fifteen,'' I say softly

Vivia sputters,'' fifteen!?''

''yes…'' I reply, '' is something wrong?''

'' oh no dearie of course not it's just that well you're more developed than most fifteen year olds,'' she says staring at my body.

I suddenly feel self-conscious, I try covering my breasts when everyone turns to look at me, I've always been more womanly when it came to my body mama said I was an early bloomer and that it was alright. I hated the looks men and boys gave me as I walked by them I felt like a fish that people were bidding over.

'' I think she looks beautiful,'' Mags says silencing Vivia with a look

'' of course she is, the capitol will love how beautiful you are dearie, forgive me if I offended you,'' Vivia says sipping her wine

'' its fine,'' I mumble

Awkward silence follows until Finnick saves us all from it,'' I have an announcement, well actually Mags and I have an announcement before we start talking games and strategies.''

Lake and I give him our full attention though Lake seems reluctant as Finnick is only a year older than him. Finnick turns his gaze to Lake first and then says something I had not been expecting at all.

'' Mags and I decided to spice up the games and make a few changes,'' he says dramatically gazing both at me and Lake with an evil glint in his eyes.

'' will you just say it!'' Lake growls impatiently

'' alright no need to yell at me, geesh,'' Finnick says rolling his eyes in mock hurt, '' Now as I was saying Mags and I have decided to swap who we will mentor,''

Both Lake and I look at him confused not understanding him entirely, Finnick smiles at our confused faces as though he were enjoying a juicy secret.

'' For those who don't understand I'll be more clear seeing as you're not as smart as me, Lake you will be mentored by Mags,'' he points to Mags with his fork and then I feel the blood drain from my face finally understanding what he was going about.

'' Which means you're all mine,'' he says seductively as he turns to face me, his bright eyes screaming with what I've seen in some men's eyes_ lust _and I knew right there that he wasn't talking about mentoring me when he said I was his. But his lust was the last of my problems there was one thing I knew about Finnick Odair and it was that in the five years of him mentoring not once did he bring back a victor and now my life was in his hands. The odds were definitely not in my favor was the thought running through my head as I locked my eyes on his.

**Please R&R I want to know what you guys think. Just to make things clear Mags hasn't had her stroke yet I'm leaving that for later and sorry for any errors I make on the way.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Again I don't own anything besides my characters**

I closed the door gently behind me leaning on it for support of today's events I felt ready to collapse my head felt heavy on my shoulders and my body was completely drained. If being reaped and taken from my family and home wasn't enough I now had to deal with Finnick Odair being my mentor and whose definition of mentoring included flirting with me. I roll my eyes as I recall the events that followed his announcement.

_**Flashback**_

'' _which means you're all mine,'' he says_

_I continue to look at him with what I'm sure is horror, how can I trust __**him**__ to bring me back to district 4 to my family?_

'' _is there a problem?'' he says from behind his glass trying but failing to hide his smile as he takes a sip of wine his eyes never leaving mine. I turn to Lake who actually seems relieved at the news, of course he'd be happy he has a better chance at survival with Mags who has brought home many victors. How lucky for him I think before I whip my head around to face Finnick once again._

'' _Why?'' I growl, '' isn't there some rule about females having to mentor the female and same with male?''_

'' _nope,'' Finnick says popping the ''p'' happily, '' and besides Mags mentored me,''_

''_but,''_

'' _but what?'' he says arching his brow enjoying this conversation way to much._

'' _I simply think it'd be best for Mags to mentor me,'' I say turning to Mags who sits quietly and patiently as she observes Finnick and I._

'' _really and why would that be?'' he asks with that ridiculous smirk still gracing his face._

'' _well…because…I um,'' I didn't know what to say I was sure that telling him how I had no faith in him as a mentor to his face wouldn't be proper and I couldn't bring myself to voicing my thoughts._

'' _oh enough!'' Vivia says loudly,'' Anwyn you should be happy that sweet Finny here wants to mentor you now be more polite and thank him.''_

_I look at her in disbelief and disgust '' sweet Finny'' I didn't even want to ask, ignoring her comment I turn to sweet Fin…I mean Finnick who looks like a child that has been given a candy._

'' _I just think it'd be easier if you mentor Lake I'm sure you'd understand each other better,'' I try saying._

'' _well why don't we ask Lake what he thinks,'' Finnick replies turning to Lake_

_Lake gives me an apologetic look before turning to Finnick,'' I don't mind Mags mentoring me,'' of course he'd choose Mags he was already thinking of ways to survive and step one was to pick the right mentor._

_Finnick claps his hands turning his ridiculous smile towards me, '' excellent now its settled Mags will mentor Lake and I'll do you, anything else you'd like to discuss princess,'' he says in a mocking voice._

_I glare at him wondering what would be the outcome of slapping the smile right off his face, '' don't call me princess,'' I growl_

'' _I thought it sounded nice but if you don't like it I suppose I can come up with something better how about…sweetheart? I like that one better don't you?'' he says his eyes filled with laughter_

_I growl ready to lunge at him when Mags decides to intervene, '' Enough! Anwyn, Finnick and I think it's best for us to mentor who we've chosen and that's that. We are not here to fight with one another so I expect for both of you to try and get along.''_

_I try speaking but I'm silenced with a glare from Mags daring me to go against her word, out of the corner of my eye I see Finnick giving Mags what seems to be a thankful smile, but why would he be thankful?_

'' _now I don't want to hear any more of this, if everyone is finished we need to see the rest of the reaping,'' she questions me more than anyone else._

_I feel like a child that is being chastised by her grandmother as she looks at me waiting for a response, I turn to Finnick who is also waiting patiently for me to speak but I'm sure in his head he's laughing at me._

'' _Fine,'' I simply say placing my napkin on the table ready for this dinner to end_

_Vivia dabs her lips with her napkin before finally making herself useful and saving me from this torture, '' Mags is right if we are all done my sweets we should go watch the reapings Lake, Anwyn pay close attention the reapings will give you a glimpse of your competition,'' she says before rising from the table and making her way to the viewing room. I follow close behind Vivia wanting to get away from Odair as soon as possible._

_Finnick and Mags are the last to sit and if my luck couldn't get any worse Finnick decided to sit next to me instead of sitting next to Vivia or on the other vacant chairs. I sigh in defeat and frustration moving to the edge of the couch but of course he notices._

'' _any further and you'll be on the floor don't worry I don't bite unless you ask me to,'' he whispers in my ear_

_I jerk my head away but his eyes stop me they were so beautiful but they seemed sad…scared…lonely and so many other emotions I couldn't name behind the sea green. My mother always said eyes were the key to knowing a person and I was surprised to see his eyes were the opposite of him. Instead of responding to his comment I turn to the viewing screen confused on what I had seen in his eyes why did he seem to be in pain when he showed to nothing but arrogance and vanity? _

'' _oh they're starting!'' Vivia announces finally taking a seat and when I say seat I mean she might as well have sat on Finnick's lap. I look at both of them as they sip on wine and laugh too loudly but something's not right something to do with Finnick he seems to be forcing his laugh and smile. When I catch Finnick's eye I quickly turn to the viewing screen trying to focus on the reapings I notice that I had already missed four of the twelve reapings I curse at myself for caring more about Finnick's laugh than the people that in a few days will try to kill me. The rest of the reapings are unimpressive the only one that catches my eye is district 7 male he was built like a tank and had a fierce look in his eyes, I'd have to watch out for him in training._

_After the reapings were through we decided to talk strategy tomorrow we were all too tired to do it right away. As I say goodnight I catch Finnick's eyes on me but it's the look they give me that I can't entirely comprehend it looked to me like__** longing.**_

_**End of Flashback**_

Why did Finnick look at me like that…was it really longing? I shake my head trying to clear it and my inner ramblings what Finnick Odair feels is not my business nor should it matter to me I had to concentrate on _me_ and my _survival_. Walking away from the door I decide to get ready for bed maybe if I get some rest I could start thinking and stop feeling but somehow I knew that wouldn't happen. After changing into a silky pink nightdress I get into bed trying to find solace in my sleep but when I think of where I am I feel my tears finally start to fall and I can't stop them how is my family holding up? Are they crying too? Can my sisters sleep without my bedtime stories or my songs to rock them to sleep? I let myself cry not wiping the tears away maybe this will be the last time I'll have to let my emotions loose without caring about the cameras. I cry until I can't cry anymore and when my tears finally stop I feel myself slipping into unconsciousness.

_**I'm running through a forest I look behind me and all I see is fog trying to catch up to me and suddenly I fall hitting my head hard on the ground, I feel blood running down my face I quickly stand up when I see the boy from district 7 grab me. I fight him trying to push him off me I finally get free and I see a knife in my hand where did it come from? I see myself stabbing him with it repeatedly until he's nothing but blood I look at my hands and scream what had I done? Turning around I see my family they look disappointed and angry I try walking to them but they seem to move away from me.**_

'' _**how could you Annie?'' Marina says**_

'' _**you're a killer,'' Coral says crying**_

'' _**you aren't my daughter you're a monster,'' my mother says**_

'' _**we don't love you anymore, who can love a murderer,'' my father finally speaks shaking his head at me**_

_**I cry trying, begging them to understand that I had done this for them that I wasn't a monster but as I speak they all point their fingers at me or behind me that is. Turning I see bodies bloodied bodies behind me lying on the ground facing my family I see them choking on their blood as they fall to the ground when I see a trident in my hand. I catch my reflection on a puddle of water my eyes are red my teeth are pointed like Enobaria a previous victor of district 2 its then I let out a scream.**_

I wake up gasping for air sweat runs down my body I try to get a grip of my surroundings telling myself it was just a dream. When I finally control my breathing I push away the covers and stand from the bed needing to get away from the room and my nightmare. I decide to get something to drink my throat felt completely dry and I needed to calm myself if I wanted to sleep a bit more. I walk quietly and swiftly through the compartments making my way to the dining room and to the drink dispenser inputting my order. In seconds I have my cup of steaming hot milk making my way to grab it I hear a smooth voice behind me.

'' couldn't sleep?'' the voice says scaring me enough to burn my hand with the mug, I screech in pain as the hot milk falls on my hand.

'' Shit! Are you okay?'' Finnick says moving quickly to my side taking my hand in his. As he takes my hand a strange wave flows through my body it was like electricity I quickly remove my hand at the feeling.

'' hey I just want to see if it's burned badly,'' he tries soothing me as he gently takes my hand in his again. His hand is warm and smooth against my own for some odd reason it makes me feel comforted, I can still feel the strange sensation and I'm sure he can too because he seems to be staring at me as though I'm the strangest thing he's ever seen. I hiss as he touches a sensitive part of the burnt skin but the shivers that run through me have nothing to do with the pain.

'' it's not burnt badly thankfully but it'll need something cool to take away the swelling, here sit down while I get ice,'' he orders me and I do as I am told cradling my hand to my chest.

In a matter of seconds he sits in front of me and takes my hand rubbing a piece of ice on my delicate skin, the ice begins to calm my aching skin but it doesn't calm the ache I feel in my chest.

'' feel better?'' he asks turning his scorching green eyes to me.

'' yes thank you,'' I whisper trying to avoid his gaze and instead focus on the melting ice.

'' you don't like me do you,'' he says more as a statement than a question startling me at his frankness.

'' I don't think anything of you,'' I say honestly and it wasn't a complete lie in all my years of hearing girls sigh and gossip over Finnick Odair I never cared to be anything other than indifferent.

'' I think that's worse than having your hatred,'' he tells me and I see a flash of hurt running over his beautiful face.

'' what is?'' I ask confused.

'' your indifference, most people love me or hate me but you…don't care,'' he says softly his voice different from its usual cocky drawl.

'' I don't know you enough to hate you and I don't…love you that's for sure,'' I say turning my gaze to my hand when I hear a soft whisper I almost don't catch it.

'' it would be you to not care,'' I look up confused what did he mean by that?

'' what would be me?'' I ask confused.

'' nothing forget it,'' he says again running his hand over mine now that the ice has completely melted. I stare at how his hand runs gently over mine tracing every line on my palm how could someone that is so strong be so soft at the same time?

'' I know you don't believe in me,'' he says not turning his gaze away from my hand.

''…'' I don't know what to say did he mean I didn't believe in him as a mentor?

'' I know people say I'm the worst mentor district 4 has ever had that I can't mentor to save my life let alone the life of a tribute,'' he says breaking the silence his voice is etched with hurt and pain. '' I know the moment I told you I would mentor you, you were thinking of every way I could help you die.''

'' I didn't…'' I try saying

'' no it's okay it's true I haven't brought home a victor but it's not because I don't care or don't try I just…it's…'' he tries explaining but I can tell he's never had to explain himself to anyone or simply can't explain. Is Odair trying to be honest with me I think as I gaze at his face why me of all people? I feel the need to console him to my utter astonishment I've barely shared a few sentences which have mostly been mocking and angry but yet I just want to…I don't know what I want to do.

'' you're only nineteen how can we expect for you to have mentored when you were only a child,'' I try saying.

He looks up from my hand and gives me a small smile,'' the tributes until you have always been older or maybe just a year younger, they would ignore me or say how they would've killed me in the games.''

I wait patiently for him to continue I knew he wanted to say more and for some reason I wanted to listen.

'' I tried to help them but they never wanted to listen to a child they thought I was stupid and only won by my looks…they didn't…they didn't care that I fought to go home all they saw was a _**''pretty boy''**_ he says sarcastically.

'' Finnick…I…''

'' you don't have to feel sorry for me I know that all you see me as is an arrogant vain moron that only cares about himself, I saw it the moment you got on the train and maybe you're right maybe all I care about is me if I didn't who would?''

'' Finnick I don't think you're an arrogant moron,'' I say but stop when he gives me an oh really look, '' okay maybe I thought you were vain and arrogant and so many other things but I also know that there's more than meets the eye and if we get to know each other maybe I can start to…like you.''

He looks surprised by my comment but recovers with his usual smirk and I was actually happy to see his smirk I didn't know how to handle a sad Odair I rather handle his smirky annoying counterpart.

'' and how would you suggest we get to know each other?'' he asks seductively

I roll my eyes at his comment, '' for starters If you want me to like you as my mentor then you won't talk to me like I'm one of your fan girls,''

'' deal,'' he says smiling at me with a less seductive look, '' and in return I want you to trust me Anwyn I promise I will do everything in my power to bring you home.''

I'm surprised and taken aback by his intensity why do I matter to him? Why does it seem he wants me to live?

'' Finnick can I ask you something?''

'' go ahead,''

'' why did you choose to mentor me over Lake?''

It takes almost a minute for him to answer and when he does I'm glad that I'm sitting because the look he gives me would make me drop.

'' because you're special Anwyn, because you remind me of me, because…because I want you to _**survive**_.'' He says never taking his eyes off me.

I don't know how to respond to that but I have so many more questions that I can't bring myself to ask. I suddenly feel tired this conversation had drained me thoroughly, Finnick notices as I try to hold back a yawn.

'' I'm sorry you must be tired and I'm keeping you up,'' he says kindly

'' no, it's fine I don't think I can sleep,'' I say honestly

'' that's right you came in here for something soothing didn't you?''

'' yes warm milk can make me feel calm my mother would give it to me after a bad dream,'' I say realizing that I gave him something personal about me.

'' you had a bad dream?'' he asks

'' I don't want to talk about it,'' I say

'' I've learned over the years that not speaking about nightmares is just as bad as having them, talking helps.''

'' I rather not I…I don't want to,'' I try explaining

'' okay I understand but if you need someone to listen I'm here.''

'' thank you,'' I whisper when I notice my hand is still in his, Finnick follows my gaze and quickly lets go.

'' I'm sorry,'' he says quickly and then in a smaller voice he mumbles something I can't really make out but I catch a few words like '' feels'' and '' natural''.

'' its fine,'' I say standing, '' I should get some rest,''

'' yeah you're right,'' he says following my lead but at the same moment he stands I bump into him.

'' I'm sorry,'' I say looking up at him its then I notice how tall he is compared to me he's a good head taller. Finnick gazes down at me and I remember that I'm only wearing a nightgown that reaches mid-thigh and doesn't leave much to the imagination. I can feel my face reddening as I see his eyes making their way down my body and then make their way back to my eyes.

'' you have really beautiful eyes,'' he says taking me by surprise I was expecting him to comment on my barely there sleepwear, '' it's like I can see the ocean in them.''

'' thank you,'' I say shyly

'' you're different aren't you?'' he says looking at me in wonder

'' is that a bad thing?'' I question him

'' no, I like different,'' he replies

'' I should go,'' I whisper almost dazed

He seems disappointed but quickly turns to look above my head,'' yeah you're right you should get some sleep…I should get some sleep.''

'' goodnight,'' I say stepping around him when I remember that I didn't know why he had been awake he was wearing pajamas after all…

'' Finnick,'' I say catching his attention; he quickly looks towards me in question.

'' hmm…?''

'' why were you up at this time?'' I ask

''…''

When I feel that he won't answer I turn to leave him alone seeing that he was sitting on his chair again looking at nothing in particular instead of leaving with me like I thought he would.

'' I don't sleep much actually I can't sleep much,'' he whispers to the window not looking at me

I remember his words from earlier and try using them on him, '' someone once told me that talking about their dreams is good,''

He lets out a small chuckle but doesn't turn to me still looking out the window as if he were seeing what no one else could, '' if you knew what I dream about you wouldn't…wouldn't…go to sleep Anwyn, it's late we have a lot to do tomorrow.''

I stand looking at him puzzled what did he mean by I wouldn't…what wouldn't I? I decide to stop my questioning and just leave but before I do his soft voice stops me.

'' Trust me _little mermaid_ I want you to come home just as much as the others,''

I turn to him again but he ignores me his eyes still far away as he touches the window tapping on the glass in a steady rhythm, I wait for him to say something more but he doesn't and I simply leave closing the door gently behind me.

I walk swiftly into my bedroom feeling out of breathe as though I swam for miles, my head was filled with so many questions and they were all about Finnick, what did he mean by all he said to me? Why was he so keen on me surviving over Lake? I sigh running my hand over my face in frustration something tells me that these games will change me forever I feel that Finnick Odair's presence will change me, but how I wonder. He called me little mermaid just like most people in district 4 did I didn't think he even knew my name let alone my story but he was full of surprises and I'm sure more were to come.

I get into bed feeling exhausted looks like I didn't need my milk after all our conversation had drained me and made me forget all about my dream. But now my head was full of other thoughts and the only way to sum them up was in two words:_** Finnick Odair.**_

**Hope you guys enjoy please review and thanks to the favorites and follows and of course a special shout out to the people that reviewed.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Again don't own anything just the characters you meet on the way.**

''Wakey! Wakey! It's breakfast time!'' I hear Vivia yell from behind the close door.

Groaning into my pillow I try to block the sound of her overly cheery voice, why does she have to be so loud? Sighing I decide to just get up before she comes barging in, pushing away the covers I take in my surroundings wishing that for some miracle I would be staring at the sea green walls of my room back home instead of the cold blue walls facing me now. I run my hand over my face and tell myself to stop mourning what I don't have at the moment and besides if I played my cards right and if Finnick really meant what he said to me last night then I had a chance of going home._ Finnick_, I'm still thinking of what happened between us last night he had plagued my thoughts even in my sleep with the same question running over and over in my mind: _what am I too him?_

I try ignoring my thoughts and just get ready for the day, after finishing with the bare necessities I walk to the closet ready to choose an outfit. Instead of programming the computer to give me something I just look through the immense selection of clothing deciding on a beautiful knitted long sleeve dress and a pair of brown boots. After dressing I decide to look in the mirror preparing to fix my hair but my hair is perfect even after my night of tossing and turning.

''_Hair is rope, the tighter it is the better it looks,'' mama had once told me._

I smile at the memory she had been right, she was always right. Looking down from my hair I glance at my attire, the dress fell a few inches below my mid- thigh and the boots made my legs seem longer even without a heel. The girl in the mirror was beautiful…I was beautiful…my face even after a night of unrest and tears was just as beautiful as it had been before the reaping. I had never been vain enough to analyze my beauty but I tried to see why people always said my beauty was indescribable, looking more directly in the mirror I saw a fifteen year old girl that seemed to be in the body of an eighteen year old she had eyes that were a mix of sea green with specks of blues and gold's, and her face was flawless she had never used makeup or those enhancers girls bought to appear pretty. Is that why girls hated me, because while they needed oils, and powders, and a thousand other things I was already beautiful I just had to be me.

I suddenly remember what Finnick had said, how people thought he only won by being the prettiest the way he had said seemed so sad and bitter…would that be me if I won on my looks alone? Would I be nothing more than a pretty face to the capitol…to the districts? I shake my head at the thought I didn't care what people thought as long as I got to go home they could call me beautiful and whatever they wanted, I didn't care…I didn't…or did I? Walking away from the mirror I make my way to the door and out towards the dining compartment. Lake and Mags are noticeably absent but that isn't what stops me dead in my tracks it's the way Vivia is sitting on Finnick's lap laughing as he drops kisses on her neck.

He's the first to notice me, he stops his kissing and a look of horror flashes in his eyes almost immediately but he's quickly hidden behind Vivia's oversized wig as she turns to face me.

'' Oh dearie there you are!'' she says standing from Odair's lap and acting as though what I saw was normal and maybe it was normal to her. What did I expect for Finnick to stop being a womanizer just because he shared his failures as a victor with me?

'' Do you know if Mags and Lake are coming?'' she asks as she fixes her skirt which to my horror was pushed up and wrinkled I could only guess why that was.

'' Oh those two!'' she groans overly dramatic,'' I'll just go check on them, why don't you keep sweet Finny company dearie,''

I try turning my gaze away from her as she leans over Finnick and kisses him sloppily but I can't and I can't help but notice that he doesn't seem to share her enthusiasm in the kiss but I've never been kissed so how would I know.

'' I'll be back Finny you just stay right here,'' she said giving him a wink and giggling like the rest of his fan girls as she walks out of the compartment her heels clicking loudly down the hall until they can no longer be heard. I turn away from the close door and walk slowly to the table making sure to take a seat far from Finnick only whispering a good morning not knowing what else to say and trying to figure out why I felt a sharp pain in my chest. I tried thinking why I felt hurt by his actions but I couldn't find a single reason, suddenly it's his voice that takes me away from my thoughts.

'' What you saw…it,'' he tries explaining but I cut him off

'' It's fine, it's none of my business,'' I say waving him off as though I didn't care not even giving him a glance and instead give my attention to a pastry I pick up from a basket.

'' Anwyn please lis…''

'' Finnick I don't care, you don't have to explain anything to me, as long as you do your job as my mentor you can…befriend…whoever you want,'' I try saying as politely and indifferently as possible, finally looking up I see his eyes are begging me to listen but I don't want to even as I see flashes of hurt I still look at him with indifference.

'' But I…''

'' Finnick enough! You don't owe me anything you are who you are and I don't care, you're nothing more than my mentor…that's all you are to me,'' I say making sure he hears every word clearly but I want to take the words back just as quickly as I had said them when I see his face look as though I had driven a knife through him.

He quickly masters his face and simply nods reaching for his mug, I want to apologize but I don't I couldn't stop thinking how instead of making plans and working on strategy he was kissing our escort. The words he said to me last night seemed to have been erased I no longer felt sorry for him the only that should matter to me at this moment was my own not his.

We sit in silence until I hear the annoying clicking of heels from behind me followed my more footsteps but I don't give them any attention as I continue to take pieces off my pastry.

'' Good morning,'' I hear Mags say and I don't feel like responding but I can't be rude to her so I give her a small smile and a morning. When she turns her gaze to Finnick I seem them share a look her smile falters at what she sees in his eyes, I quickly avoid her eye when she turns to me like if I had done something wrong.

'' Good morning,'' I hear a strong voice say next to me I quickly turn to see Lake had taken the seat next to me it had been the first time he had spoken directly to me since the reaping.

'' Good morning,'' I reply softly almost shyly I had never been good at talking to boys maybe it was the fact that they wouldn't stop staring at me. It's then I decide to get a good look at Lake and try to remember bits about him, he was handsome I could recall girls fawning over him but he never had a girlfriend he told me once when I bought fish from his parent's stand that he had his eye set on a girl but she didn't even know he existed. I saw him sometimes in his career uniform looking like a trained soldier instead of a young man; I knew that he rarely had time for anything as only child he helped sustain his family just as much as his father and I had heard he was better than most careers from the kids at school. He never showed off though he usually kept to himself or in his small circle of friends but other than that he was the silent type. It was hard not to like him but I knew that in order for me to win he had to die easy as that.

I turn back to my food ignoring the chatter Vivia is having with no one in particular I wonder if she has ever heard herself speak probably not or else she would have ripped off her ears by now. Looking down at my plate I notice I hadn't even taken a bite from my bread once I chastise myself not eating wouldn't help I needed to be strong and well fed before the games I needed to up my game and start focusing on me. I reach for the butter when I feel my hand come in contact with another more masculine hand, looking up I see it was Lake's hand which he quickly withdraws allowing me to get the butter. I felt myself blush at the look and the smile he gave me; I don't even notice that Vivia was talking to me until I hear my name being called loudly.

'' Anwyn!'' Vivia screeches impatiently

'' I'm sorry what did you say?'' I ask ignoring the looks I'm getting

'' I asked if you knew Lake already,'' she says

'' we went to school together,'' I say simply but apparently that's too boring for her and decides a different approach.

'' Really it looks to me that you two know each other a little better with that blush dearie,'' she says giggling and I'm all but ready to strangle her but the look Finnick has on his face is what stops me. He's glaring at Vivia and if looks could kill she'd be on the ground. But then again all eyes are on me and I don't know how to reply to Vivia's comment but it's Lake that saves me.

'' Her dad fixes my dad's spear's and stuff Anwyn sometimes helps,'' he says giving Vivia a shut it look it's what I know to be the career glare. The look quickly makes Vivia stop her comments and questions of how well we knew each other but she recovers quickly.

'' Why don't you tell us something about you Lake dearie you're just so quiet sometimes I don't even think you're here,'' she says as she cuts into her eggs.

'' there's nothing to say,'' he answers briskly taking a bite of bread.

'' there must be something how about…oh I know do you have a girlfriend?'' she asks

'' no,'' he says quickly and shortly

'' oh but you're just so handsome I can't imagine there aren't girls clawing at you,'' she continue wanting a longer answer or simply gossip.

Lake shrugs but to my surprise he actually replies with more than a few words,'' if you must know so you can leave me alone there is this one girl she's not my girlfriend but I've had a crush on her since I could remember ,''

'' and why isn't she your girlfriend dearie you aren't exactly horrible to look at might I say, of course not as handsome as Finny but close,'' she says winking at Finnick who oddly hasn't spoken at all.

'' she doesn't care about looks she's oblivious when it comes to that,''

'' really and why is that?''

'' she's the prettiest girl in district 4 maybe in Panem and she hasn't noticed, she doesn't notice _me,_'' he finishes and it's then he gives me a look, oh no is he talking about me? All eyes are on me again except Finnicks his are too busy glaring at Lake. Why would Lake say something like that? Is he trying to make me feel sorry for him so I won't kill him? To confuse me? Great just great first Finnick and now Lake I didn't have time for some silly crush or romance I needed to win and this wasn't going to stop me. Before I can say anything it's Finnick that goes for the kill and finally speaks.

'' maybe you aren't special enough for her to notice you and if she's as beautiful as you say she is then I'm sure there are more like you waiting in line so if I were you I'd stop dreaming,'' Finnick says mockingly as he takes a bite of fruit acting as if what he just said wasn't rude at all.

'' Finnick!'' Vivia shouts, '' what a rude thing to say!''

'' oh no it's fine Vivia,'' Lake says as if he wasn't insulted by what Finnick had said,'' he's right she'll never notice me if the great Finnick Odair can't get her attention how would I?''

Well that wiped the smile off Finnick's face I think as I turn to look at him he looks all but ready to lunge and Lake is giving him a knowing look accompanied with a mocking grin that put Finnick's to shame. It's Vivia that ends the glaring contest with another question, geez doesn't this woman see she started all this with her invasive questions?

'' what ever does Lake mean Finny?''

We all turn to Finnick who has such a menacing look that I fear for Lake's life I want to intervene but It's Mags that does I see her grab onto Finnick's hand wrapping her own bony one around his clenched fist stopping him from doing something he'll regret.

'' Enough we need to talk strategies not be bickering with one another, I suggest we start now and first thing first mentored together or separate?'' she asks giving both Lake and Finnick a look it's the same look she gave me last night at dinner it called for obedience.

'' separate,'' I hear myself saying

Mags silently nods and next to her Finnick looks pleased but it's the hurt that I see in Lake's eyes that makes me want to take back what I say but I don't I have a promise to keep to my family and he hadn't said no to Finnick's idea of swapping mentors I owed him nothing.

'' separate it is,'' Finnick says in a sing song voice giving Lake a devious smile, '' is that okay Lakey?''

'' Finnick!'' Mags gives him a warning but it seems neither him nor Lake are ready to stop their little war.

'' Don't call me that Finny you might like those stupid nicknames but I don't as for the mentoring separately part I'm fine with that I don't think Finnick can help me in anything…well unless I want to know how to smile before I die,'' he mocks and if it wasn't for Mags hand over Finnick's he would have strangled Lake.

'' why you little…''

''oh I'm sorry did I struck a nerve I mean it's not like you haven't heard what they say about you back home or perhaps there's too much air in your head that you haven't heard,''

'' young man you cannot speak to Finnick like that,'' Vivia tries saying but Lake doesn't stop his taunting.

'' you're right Vivia I am terrible sorry for saying the truth, Mags if you don't mind I'd like to begin with strategy,'' he says standing from the table but before he walks away he leans close to my ear but his eyes are on Finnick who looks ready to kill,'' I totally understand if you change your mind on being mentored seperately I'm sure Mags can help you on how to pass the bloodbath unlike Odair who will help you on how to take a knife to the throat.''

And with that he walks away a smirk gracing his face I just sit stunned, what just happened? Even Vivia is quiet for once but she quickly recovers, '' Well how rude but if you excuse me I have things to do I don't do well with all this animosity I much rather make sure everything is set for our arrival,'' she says getting up but not before gives Finnick a peck,'' and I hope you finish what you started.''

Finnick doesn't reply not even with his usual smirk, Vivia pretends not to notice fixing her wig even though it was already straight and swiftly walks out of the room.

'' I'll go deal with Lake while you two discuss your plans,'' Mags says patting Finnick on his shoulder giving him another one of those strange looks they always share and makes her way out the door closing behind her with a hiss.

I turn to Finnick who is looking out the window just like he did last night not once looking at me. The silence is uncomfortable a silent Finnick Odair is frightening and awkward so I decide to speak first we had to talk strategy after all.

'' So…shouldn't we get started?'' I ask in a pathetic voice

He turns to me as though he forgot I was still there his eyes are bright with too many emotions and unlucky for me he uses me as a target.

'' Started on what? Do you want me to teach you how to do your make up before you die or maybe you'd like to know how strut across the bloodbath,'' he says bitterly at me.

'' What Lake said…''

'' Was exactly what you thought,'' he says cutting me off,'' if you want help go ask Mags she'll tell you what to do and maybe you'll make it past the first day.''

I look at him astonished what happened to the Finnick Odair that promised practically swore to me that he would bring me home?

'' Where are you going?'' I ask as I see him standing looking ready to leave.

'' my room I'm tired I want to be fresh before we get to the capitol in a few hours,'' he replies

'' What! But…but what about me…we need to have a plan,'' I shout standing up as well

'' I told you go to Mags,'' he says and then I see red.

Grabbing a knife from the table I throw it and it lands on its target only an inch away from where his hand was on the door's button he turns to look at me slowly and then back at the knife in surprise.

'' I don't want Mags' help I want yours last night you promised me you'd help me now today I need you to make that promise true what Lake said is true back home no one believes in you but you can prove them wrong bring_ me_ back and prove them all you're more than what they say you are,'' I say strongly I can see that Finnick was taken aback I was too who knew I could talk to someone like that.

Finnick grabs the knife from where it's lodged in the wall observing it and the dent it left behind.

'' How did you do that?'' he asks not caring that the knife had been at aimed at him only a moment ago.

I shrug but respond anyway, '' my dad taught me he used to be a career he always said that I should know how to use weapons so I wouldn't get hurt,''

'' that was a really good shot what else can you do?'' he asks as he sits once again motioning me to do the same.

'' I'm good with spears, knifes obviously, I'm really fast especially in water, I'm strong, and I'm good with a trident,'' I say listening off everything I knew how to do while Finnick leans back and studies me before he speaks.

''How good with a trident?'' he asks

'' I never miss but I'm better with knifes they're lighter and easier to hit the target with,''

''hmm…''

''hmm what?'' I ask him and it's his smile that answers almost immediately

'' Mermaids are beautiful creatures but did you know that they're actually pretty dangerous?''

I nod not knowing where he was going with this maybe he and Lake were right and I should have Mags help me out.

'' do you know why they were dangerous?'' he asks

''they…in stories they would use their beauty and song to attract sailors…and then they'd drown them,'' I say recalling the stories my mother used to tell me and the stories I later told my sisters.

'' they were beautiful people said they looked so innocent but their looks were deceiving…beauty was their weapon they were lethal but they seemed to beautiful to be,'' he continues

'' and what does that have to do with me?'' I ask impatiently

'' beauty…_your beauty_ will be your weapon make the capitol think you're just a pretty face and then you wow them with your skills…beautiful but deadly,''

'' beautiful but deadly,'' I repeat so his plan was like the one my parents gave me to use my looks and then kill.

'' exactly do you know how Johanna Mason won last year?''

'' she pretended she was weak and then when there were only a few left she was a vicious killer,'' I respond instantly remembering how Johanna of district 7 had made everyone think she was a weakling and in truth she was the won to kill Finnick had done something along those lines in his own games.

'' Do the same act like you can't do anything other than look in a mirror try getting with the careers and flirt a little make it seem like without them you wouldn't survive a day and after that you show who you really are,'' he finishes looking proud of himself.

'' what if it doesn't work?''

'' you asked me to try well now I'm asking you to believe in me, can you do that?'' he asks but before I can reply I hear Vivia running and clapping happily.

'' We're here! We're here! We're in the Capitol dearies!'' she screeches I notice Mags and Lake had stepped into the compartment as well, Lake looks out from a window and I do the same only to be captivated with what I see.

The Capitol glistening and shining in all its glory hundreds of building all high and mighty reflect the sun's rays, so here's where the lucky ones live the one's we feed and dress and do everything for I think bitterly.

'' It's beautiful isn't it?'' Vivia screeches neither Lake nor I say anything but I can tell we're both thinking the same thing the districts are the ones that keep this place beautiful while some starve and die. How lucky we are to be under its control is the last thing I think before the train begins to slow as it reaches the station, its flooded with cameras and people all smiling and waving as though we weren't here as sacrifices for their amusement. I smile at them just like I had practiced and when the doors of the train opens I turn to Finnick and whisper my answer, '' I trust you.''

**enjoy guys and thanks for all the love and support!**


	6. Chapter 6

**I own nothing if i did Finnick wouldn't have died. Thanks again to the fans and i hope you enjoy this chapter!**

'' Oh she's even more beautiful than Finnick,'' a woman that knows no other color than pink says shrieking to the other strange creatures I think her name Lucianna but I couldn't quite hear with all the screaming.

'' Look at this skin I'd do anything for her skin, '' another woman with bright green hair says her skin is so powdered she puts Vivia to shame and her eyes are framed with tattoos of never ending vines.

'' and this hair how can hair be this dark I just love this hairstyle it's beautiful!'' says the only man in the group he just as strange as the others his hair is shoulder length in a yellow tone just like his cat like eyes and his face has too much makeup I was taken aback when I first saw him.

'' I don't think we can make her more beautiful that's just impossible!'' the green haired woman says still touching me while I just continue to stare at them in wonder.

'' Demitria is right Afton she's a goddess,'' Lucianna says, so that's their names just as strange as Vivia's I say to myself.

'' we'll just do the bare essentials nothing to drastic we don't want to take away from her beauty,'' Afton tells the others and they nod in respond quickly getting to work.

I do what Finnick told me to do and that was to do what they wanted and pretend to like their attentions. I feel every bit of hair being ripped off my body it hurts but I say nothing and they only take a few minutes thank god.

'' she's easier than the girl last year she took almost all night,'' I hear one of them say the others agree with hums and giggles.

After the torture is done Afton turns to my hair he gently touches the perfectly braided bun and sighs in sadness.

'' This is such a beautiful piece of work. It's a shame to destroy it really,'' he says as he removes the pin one by one trying not to pull my hair in the process. '' But Pixie wants your hair loose and in waves I'm sure you will look just as beautiful either way.''

'' You're such a beautiful canvas to work with Anwyn I wish I looked like you,'' Demitria says as she runs creams over my face and body before applying makeup, I decide to try and woo them.

'' I think you're beautiful in your own way I just love your tattoos they're amazing,'' I say giving her a smile as I pretend to enjoy her attentions on my body.

'' oh thank you it means so much coming from someone so breathtakingly beautiful,'' she says tears forming in her eyes as though she's never received a compliment in her life.

'' Her nails are gorgeous a few chips but nothing I can't fix,'' Lucianna says as she files my nails adding a coating of clear polish.

Suddenly I feel a hand taking off my necklace I quickly pull away from the contact trying to protest but Afton stops me with a smile.

'' Don't worry I'll give it to Pixie and she'll give it to your mentor,'' he says to which I simply nod.

After they unknot my hair, moisturize my skin, and fix my nails they finally keep their hands to themselves and quickly clean up the area before telling me to lie down on the cold metal slab. They leave me alone to wait for my stylist and all I can do is count as the time ticks by until I hear the door finally open. Looking to the door I see something I wasn't expecting an almost completely normal young woman in her early 20's she was very pretty prettier than the others even without the vibrant colors and heavy makeup. She simply wore all black and she made an impression she wore a sparkly black blouse under an equally black blazer with spiked shoulder pads her pants were also black even her sky high heels, her hair was cut in a simple spiked do that was so black it almost seemed blue and her makeup consisted of black eye shadow and red lipstick all in all she made the outfit look beautiful.

'' stand up,'' she says,'' without the sheet.''

I stand up dropping the sheet to the floor no need to be modest I had been naked for the better part of the day. She slowly walks around me, inspecting every inch of my body just looking never touching.

'' Perfection, absolute perfection,'' she says giving me a kind smile before she gives me her hand to shake, '' I'm Pixie your stylist.''

'' Anwyn. Anwyn Cresta.''

'' I must say Anwyn the cameras didn't do justice to your beauty I have never seen someone so beautiful,'' she says touching my hair almost like she was comforting me.

'' thank you,'' I say shyly

'' you seem much older than the average fifteen year old,'' she says and I immediately roll my eyes at the comment.

'' I know I'm more developed,'' I say almost rudely

'' I wasn't talking about your body that's obvious but when I look at you I see more than a pretty face I can see a girl that has worked too hard to support her family, I can see it on your hands they seem perfect now but only an hour ago I can assure you they were bruised and had callouses from hours of labor,'' she says surprising me her eyes which I now see are a deep blue seem kind and honest not fake and superficial.

'' I know you think we are all the same, here in the capitol I mean that we all worship the games and adore the pretty tributes but I can tell you I'm different I want to be more than just your stylist I want to be your friend,'' she continues,'' I know you see me as the person that's going to create an image to make an impression but you don't need me for that you can do that all on your own I'm not asking you to love me right away but I can assure you I'm on your side.''

I stare at her trying to find a lie but all I see is pure honesty I never expected to actually like a capitol citizen but it seemed Pixie wasn't just a capitol citizen she didn't tell me how amazing it was to design for the games rather she offered her friendship.

'' did you always work with district 4?'' I ask, '' it's just you seem so young,''

'' I wanted 4 I had to use my connections to get it this is my first year so I would have had district 12 but I'm very convincing when I want something,'' she answers

'' why 4?''

'' because I find that so many beautiful things come from district 4 as a girl I used to dream of being from there of living by the ocean of mermaids, then I saw not everything was seashells and white sand I saw what lies behind the beautiful facade, and I hated that district 4 tributes were always dressed up in fish costumes or nets I wanted to leave my own mark on 4.'' She says

'' so I'm not going to be a fish,'' I joke giving her a smile

She laughs before she answers,'' no, I've spoken with Finnick and it seemed we thought exactly alike, a mermaid beautiful but deadly that's what you'll be in the parade a mermaid, you already have the looks all you need is the style.''

'' you'll have to trust me and I'm going to push you past any comfort zone but believe me when I say the capitol will know what true beauty is,'' she finishes running a hand down my cheek, '' do you trust me?''

'' yes,'' I say simply it was odd how I could trust her in only a matter of moments.

'' excellent, let's get to work.''

It takes hours for me to get sorted, they put gels and oil to make my hair look wet as it falls in deep waves while flowers and what looks like seaweed is placed on it alongside a crown of pearls. Demitria takes the longest even with Lucianna's help both painting my arms and face, I'm not allowed to see anything but their oh's and awe's tell me I'm already making an impression.

Pixie stands aside giving instructions and making sure I looked the way she wanted after they are finished they step back and gasp at their work.

'' oh my!''

'' extraordinary!''

'' who said she couldn't look more beautiful,''

'' true beauty,''

These are all words I hear I don't know who said what but in the end they said the same thing, I was beautiful even more so than before.

'' now for the clothes,'' Pixie says holding up a black bag, '' close your eyes Anwyn I want it to be a surprise.''

I nod and immediately do as I'm told, I feel someone slip my robe off and instruct me to lift a leg and then the other I feel a breezy fabric touch my skin it feels light and soft. I notice that my breasts still feel exposed until someone places my hair over them so that's what Pixie meant by pushing my comfort zone I was going topless.

'' Done!'' I hear Afton say

'' oh my have you seen anything more beautiful,'' Demitria says in a whisper

I hear sniffles as though someone is crying, '' she exquisite, '' Lucianna crys

I feel a hand on my arm leading me somewhere I move cautiously not wanting to fall and ruin their work.

'' you can open your eyes now Anwyn,'' Pixie says in my ear and I immediately do as I'm told standing in front of a full length mirror I see what they had done to me and I can't help but gasps, they were right I was perfection.

I walk closer to the mirror and touch the reflection. They had painted scales around my eyes and my arms making it look like I was wearing gloves, my hair looks like I had just taken a swim the flowers and seaweed looking like they belonged there as well as the pear crown, like I had felt my upper half was bare only a few strands of hair covered the peaks but left nothing to the imagination and my bottom half was covered by a skirt that opened to reveal my legs the skirt was shimmering in the light with crystal that resembled water drops it had a long train behind it.

'' I wanted to make you a mermaid but I didn't want you to have a tail I wanted you to be a mermaid that transforms into a human, do you like it?'' Pixie questions

'' thank you,'' is all I say I'm completely speechless and they giggle at my astonishment.

'' don't thank us you make this look work,'' Afton says while the others blow me kisses I notice Pixie is walking up to me a box in her hand.

'' These are your key to victory,'' she says simply handing me the box.

I take it in my hand and open it, inside are contact lenses, but I can't understand why she said these were my victory I look at her but she only smiles instructing me how to put them in. After three attempts and a few tears they're both in. Demitria scorns me for having to retouch my makeup but soon gasps at what she sees.

I turn to the mirror once again blinking and trying to adjust myself to the intrusion. I stare open mouthed at what I see my eyes look like they are the sea, its looks like waves are crashing and rippling, and they emphasize the many colors of my eyes.

'' Well?'' Pixie asks

'' they're beautiful,'' I smile and she grins with satisfaction.

'' you are a work of art Awyn Cresta now it's time for your moment _Mermaid_.''

I'm quickly whisked away to the bottom of the remake center where I'm met horses, tributes, mentors, stylist, and more all ready for the parade. I look around trying to find anyone from my district when I bump into what seems like a boulder, I quickly look up only to be met with green eyes and they weren't like the ones back home, in front of me stood a handsome man with blonde hair and vicious smile I knew who it was from all the coverage of him and his sister over the years. District 1 victor Gloss stood in from of me giving me a look I had seen on most men _lust._

'' I have to say you just made my day so much better just look at you,'' he says circling me as though I were his prey,'' Damn you're beautiful I wish I were your mentor we could have so much fun.''

I pull away from his hand as it tries to move my hair from my breast but I bump into another chest, looking up I'm happy to see Finnick who glares at the district 1 victor but the other man doesn't waiver he just smiles even bigger.

'' don't bother my tribute Gloss,'' Finnick all but growls

'' I was just complimenting her on her look Finny sweetie don't be so mad it's not every day I get to see someone this gorgeous,'' he purrs moving towards me but Finnick pushes him away

'' go back to your tributes and keep your hands to yourself or the next time I'll chop them off,'' Finnick says menacingly but Gloss only laughs.

'' now don't be so rude Finnick can't I just be nice with a pretty thing like her I don't mean any harm, relax Odair I just want to be friendly.''

'' well be friendly somewhere else,'' Finnick growls again

Gloss simply arches his brow and then turns to me, '' I know I'm supposed to be rooting for my kids but I hope you win beautiful,'' he winks before walking off,'' enjoy your tribute Odair I know I would if I were you.''

''He's _**charming**_,'' I say turning to Finnick who is still glaring at Gloss's retreating back, when he finally looks down at me his eyes go wide as they survey my body stopping at my breasts I clear my throat trying to get his attention when our eyes meet I see Finnick Odair blushing actually blushing.

'' wow…you look…wow,'' he stares at me as though he had never seen anything or anyone so beautiful.

'' thank you,'' I whisper awkwardly,'' umm…I got lost sorry,''

'' oh right we're over here come on,'' he says leading me to our chariot but not fast enough to avoid all the looks I was getting from everyone even one mentor whistled as I walked by him while another ran his hand down my arm. Finnick made sure to stand as though he were my bodyguard glaring and pushing away anyone that came in front of us to stare and I thought the people back home were bad about my looks.

I was relieved when I finally saw Lake and Mags standing by a gold chariot but my happiness is short lived when Lake runs his eyes from my head to my bare feet stopping surprisingly on my breasts note the sarcasm.

'' you look gorgeous Anwyn,'' he says charmingly

'' you look…um good too,'' I say blushing at his attire he only wore a gold net around his waist leaving him almost completely nude while the rest of him was covered in sparkles that looked like water drops just like the ones on my skirt and in his hand he held a golden trident.

'' you don't have to lie Anwyn,'' Finnick says looking at Lake as though he were a dead fish

'' Finnick please I think they both look perfect,'' Mags says smiling at me,'' especially you darling all eyes will be on you both.''

I thank her but Lake says nothing obviously hating his outfit much to Finnick's pleasure.

'' Tributes to your chariots!'' a voice comes from overhead

'' show time,'' Finnick says

Lake is the first to get on the chariot he practically stomps his way to it, Finnick helps me on it and when our hands touch I feel the same electric current just like before I look down at him while he looks into my eyes almost dazed.

'' thank you,'' I say as I find my place next to Lake

'' you're welcome,'' he whispers still gazing at me when he shakes his head and gives me the famous Odair smile I had seen often on television.

'' I'd wish you luck but you won't need it unlike you Lake try to smile otherwise who you like as mentor won't matter when no one wants to sponsor you,'' he says and before Lake can respond he walks off.

Seconds after I feel the chariot begin to pull from its place following the other chariots here we go I think to myself. The moment the doors open a fanfare of cheers and music deafens me the pair from one slip out and soon it'll be our turn I feel my legs shake and I repeat to myself what everyone had told me what I had told myself make them love you.

They gasp and cheer as we ride out I'm stunned by the overwhelming reaction. They chant '' District 4!'' they chant my name '' Anwyn!'' and I do what they want I smile and wave even winking at a few of the male citizens its then I notice all cameras are on me as I see myself on every screen. I look amazing one screen only shows my eyes and they look striking, people throw flowers at me and I blow kisses in return smiling at the knowledge of my achievement I had done it I made an impression.

We begin to slow down as we reach the city circle, right in front of the presidential mansion. The music stops and out comes President Snow ready to give his speech I notice that I'm still on the big screens and only one shows Snow I think he notices too because the look he gives me sends shivers down my spine. As he gives his speech on honor and privilege of representing our districts I look at the other tributes district 12 catches my eye but not in a good way they're both naked and covered in what I think is black paint to represent their coal district. They look horrible and underfed just like most of the other tributes after district 6 no one else is eye catching the costumes seem more ridiculous than eye stopping a jerk takes me away from my looking. I notice the speech has ended and we are being taken back to the remake center but as we go I catch President Snow gazing at me a smile on his face it looks evil and snake like.

No sooner had Lake and I got off the chariot when I feel hands all over me as I'm pulled into hugs and given kisses.

'' You did it,'' Pixie says as she hugs me tightly. I smile to myself at her comment.

We stayed embraced for a few moments, long enough for me to notice the male tributes of 1 and 2 were staring at me just like the other men had, lustfully. Moments after we are escorted into a glass elevator and in only a matter of seconds we reach the fourth floor and before the doors are completely open Vivia hugs me screeching in my ear.

'' you were amazing we couldn't get enough!''

'' thank you,'' I say discreetly pushing her off me and towards Lake who hasn't spoken to me one word I wonder if he's mad that all attention was on me. As I walk inside the living quarters I'm engulfed by the smell of food and my stomach growls instantly I hadn't had food since lunch and I was starving.

Before I can take another step Finnick and Mags come rushing out congratulating us, Finnick smiles as he stands in front of me as Mags walks to Lake.

'' you were perfect,'' he says pulling me in for a hug it should be awkward seeing as I'm topless and his shirt is almost completely unbuttoned but it's not and I don't know why. I feel him nuzzling my neck, he mumbles something but I can't make it out.

'' Anwyn, Lake shower and dress dinner will be served soon,'' Vivia orders making me pull away from Finnick I stand awkwardly avoiding his gaze and follow Vivia down the hall.

She leads Lake and I into our own bedrooms and much like the one in the train it was extravagant overly so I decide to look around later and have my shower. I walk into the bathroom and take off my skirt placing it on the counter and begin removing the ornaments from my head once I'm done I make my way into the glass shower. It takes me a while to figure it out there are just to many buttons soon I'm under a stream of warm water and lavished by soap I choose a tropical smell that reminded me of home and run it down my body washing away the paint. After washing my hair and cleaning my skin I step out of the shower and wrap myself in a soft towel but quickly drop it as I stand over a fan that dries me head to toe in an instant.

After I'm dried I walk to the closet and choose a simple top and bottoms alongside flats no need to dress up so late I say to my reflection before I walk to the dining room where Lake is already taking a seat alongside the others. I sit in between Lake and Mags she smiles at me in acknowledgement but Lake continues to ignore me and everyone for that matter but I'm too happy with my success and the praises I receive to care about his attitude. We feast on the delicious meal there's so many different dishes all equally exquisite there's lamb smothered in orange sauce, plum covered chicken, soups of all colors, and so much more all served by Avoxes.

Avoxes I knew were traitors of the capitol and as their punishment they were stripped of their tongues and made to serve as I looked at them I wondered what treason had they committed was it so horrible that they deserved this. We weren't even allowed to acknowledge their existence I tried to thank one when I dropped a fork but Vivia quickly told me to not speak to them that they were the worst of the worst. I tried not to look at them as they served us not wanting them to see that I felt sorry for them but I wondered what it would be like to be like them to never be able to speak only be able to serve I hope I would never have to find out.

After dessert we all sit to watch the parade's replay on the oversized viewing screen. The living area is even more extravagant than the one on the train decorated with deep purples and greens and many beautiful furnishings. I take a seat on the large green sofa curling into a ball feeling tired and drained today's excitement was catching up but I had to pay attention unlike when I missed the first half of the reapings. The music blares as I see the district 1 tributes wave and smile they were both equally beautiful but nowhere near me, I gasp in my mind did I just say I was the more beautiful? Well look at you Anwyn Cresta finally being vain that's a start.

''Oh! Oh! Here you two come!'' Vivia says practically jumping in her seat.

I look back at the screen and true to her words we our chariot comes to view following district 3's pair both dressed in wires and circuit boards. My eyes widen as I see myself I looked even better than I had on the viewing screens lining the parade I seem so confident as I wave and wink but I also seem like I know I'm beautiful and I love their admiration the plan was working nowhere could you see the sweet shy Anwyn only this mermaid. I give Lake a glance on the screen he seems to have captured some attention with his lack of clothing but other than that he's the average district 4 male strong, tan, blonde, and utterly unimpressive. I turn to Lake who sits alone on a single's lounge chair but his face is unreadable as he stares at the screen.

'' Look at you Anwyn I just can't stop staring at you, Pixie you've done amazing!'' Vivia says and then quickly she gives Lake a small praise as well but Lake doesn't reply.

'' When you have someone like Anwyn making an impression isn't difficult,'' Pixie says while the prep team nods in agreement as they sit next to Lakes own prep team.

'' So true!'' Vivia says taking a sip of her colorful drink before turning back to the screen.

I see the district five female glaring at me on the screen the hostility is obvious and the capitol doesn't even look at her as they follow me with their eyes even though her stylist had done well. She was dressed in a dress that seemed to glow reflecting her districts export: power. She doesn't even make an effort with the crowd just continues to glare and I know I already have an enemy.

'' oh they've done it again!'' I hear Demitria groan

'' Done what?'' Lucianna questions turning her gaze to the screen and her pink eyes flash with understanding.

I turn to see district 7 both tributes dressed as trees they have always gone with this look from what I can remember and apparently further than that. I look at the male observing that he stands proud unlike the girl that just stands there not moving but I know not to underestimate them especially not the boy. Soon the parade ends and Vivia stands applauding as she turns off the screen.

'' you two did amazing I knew from the moment I called the names that this would be district 4's year we have a victor I just known it!'' she says more to me than Lake.

I swallow slightly knowing well that she meant I would be the next victor and not Lake great maybe Lake will see me as an enemy instead of an ally now that he sees everyone things I have the better chance. It's Mags that saves me from saying anything I'm starting like her quick thinking.

'' Tomorrow is the first day of training you both need rest so get some. Finnick and I will discuss plans separately at breakfast,'' she says standing from her seat with Finnick's help she pats him on his shoulder giving him one of those looks,'' you get some rest too Finnick.''

'' But Mags can't I stay up a bit more just like the big kids do,'' he pouts like a small child but as he speaks he looks sad and Mags gives him a sympathy look before she walks towards the bedroom hall. I do the same and give everyone a goodnight making my own way to my bedroom feeling the need to lie down before I collapse.

I sigh as I close the door behind me finally alone no more shrieks or hugs just quiet and it's what I need. I blindly choose a cream toned camisole with matching shorts before dressing and running my hand through my hair and over my neck soothing the tension I felt. I pull the covers back from the bed ready to get in but a knock stops me, who could that be? I make my way to the door opening it only to see Finnick standing there.

'' Finnick,'' I say his name almost coming out like sigh,'' did you need something?''

'' I wanted to return your necklace,'' he says pulling out my necklace from his blazer pocket.

'' oh I completely forgot,'' I say allowing Finnick to enter the room.

'' thank you for keeping it safe,'' I continue coming to stand in front of him.

'' no problem,'' he says giving me a smile before he runs his fingers over the pearl, '' you know I've never seen a pearl especially not a pink one only in the books at school, how did you get it?''

'' I've had it since I was a baby…my father told me it was around my neck when he found me down by the ocean…I always have it with me it's the only thing I have from my past.'' I tell him

'' it must be difficult not knowing anything about your past…your birth parents,'' he says looking down at me

'' My mother has a saying the past is the past and the future is uncertain so we must focus on the present…some say the ocean birthed me that's why I look so different from all of you…girls at school used to tell me I was so weird that my real parents had given me up…that they hadn't wanted me,'' I whisper remembering how I had never fit in back at 4 everyone had always talked behind my back whether it was good or bad they talked.

'' those girls are wrong they're just jealous…you're special and they hate that,'' he says with such force in his voice as though defending me from my memories.

'' my mother always told me that, she said girls wanted to look like me or be me I…I just…I just wish I didn't stand out so much that I wouldn't look the way I do…I wish I were normal, I just want to be me,'' I say to him confessing I don't know I'm telling him all this but when I look at his eyes I just want to tell him everything.

'' I like you the way you are, I like you without all the mermaid paint…I like you now as you,'' he says stepping closer to me I feel a shiver run through my body it's not the one I had when the tributes of 1 and 2 were staring at me no this feeling was different.

'' I bet you say that to all the girls,'' I say still entranced by his eyes

'' No I don't,'' he replies immediately as he gazes at my lips and then back to my eyes, oh no is he going to kiss me?

'' can I have my necklace now?'' I say moving my eyes from his and stepping back.

He looks at me in disappointment; he looks at my lips in disappointment.

'' Here let me put it on you,'' he says

I turn and brush my hair out of the way giving him access to my neck. I see the chain dangle in front of me before it's pulled back slightly and then the pearl falls in place but his hands don't move as I feel him touch the length of my neck and then down my spine his touch is gentle and warm just like it had been the day I burnt my hand.

'' I should get some sleep I'm tired,'' I say and immediately he stops touching me.

'' you're right I'm keeping you awake,'' he mumbles as I face him again he runs his hand through his hair as if he wanted to say more but he couldn't and in the end all he says is,'' Goodnight.''

'' Goodnight,'' I say as he walks out of my room closing the door gently behind him leaving me in a silence that was anything but calming.

I sit on my bed but I can't find the will to lie down and sleep like I had wanted to only minutes ago instead I quickly walk to the door wanting to get some air. The lights are on a dim setting as I approach the living area but I quickly stay hidden in the darkness as I see Finnick walking out of the door fixing his suit and checking his watch before he shuts the door behind him.

_**Where is he going?**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Same as always I own nothing but the characters you meet on the way. Thank you all again for the support I'm glad that you all enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing it and a special thanks to my guest reviews whoever you are thank you for the wonderful reviews they make my day! Enjoy this chapter!**

Where did he go is all I wonder as I toss and turn still thinking about what I had seen last night, Mags had told Finnick to get some rest and in return he had given her a sad look as though he knew he wouldn't be able to get any rest, _but why? _The real question was why did it bother me so much? I wasn't anyone to tell him not to go out or question where he went it wasn't my concern but I couldn't stop thinking about him. I groan running my hands over my face, what is happening to me? Only a few days ago I couldn't care less about Finnick Odair but now I couldn't get him out of my thoughts no matter what I did. Looking towards the morning sun I decide to get up before Vivia came knocking, I tried to pretend it was because I was nervous for today but deep down I knew it had something to do with wanting to see if Finnick was back.

After stretching I walk over to the closet not knowing what I had to wear for training when I see a neat pile on the vanity a small not lays on top with two words: training outfit. I wonder how I hadn't noticed it last night; maybe you were too busy wondering where your mentor had run off to or perhaps thinking why you hadn't let him kiss you a voice says in my head. I dress quickly and braid my hair in a fish tail braid that falls neatly over my shoulder before I see my reflection in the mirror. I blush at the sight instantly; the black shirt was completely open from the collar giving a perfect view of my breasts while the olive toned shorts stopped at my thigh only covering what needed to be covered. How could this possible be a training outfit it barely covered anything but what could I do? If they had given me this to wear then I had no other choice but to wear it. I slip my feet into the black tennis shoes ignoring the tightness of the outfit as I bent down to tie them.

Straightening up I make my way to the door opening it the exact moment Vivia was about to knock.

'' Oh dearie you're already up!'' she says surprised

'' Good morning Vivia,'' I say shutting the door behind me.

'' Good morning to you too dearie, breakfast is already served go help yourself I'll just wake up the others,'' she says before she walks away ready to wake up another poor soul with her overly cheery voice.

Making my way to the dining room I'm met by Avoxes and the smell of food other than that I was the first one there. Taking a seat I pour myself orange juice and take small sips before I fill my plate with fruit and a slice of honey bread knowing that I had to eat something before training. As I take small bites I see someone out of the corner of my eye turning I see Finnick dressed in a suit similar to the one he wore yesterday while his hair is glistening wet from a recent shower, but it's not his clothing or his hair that catches my attention it's that his skin is almost red as though he had scrubbed too hard and there's a strange bruising on his neck.

'' Good morning,'' I say politely giving him a small smile.

'' Morning,'' he whispers not returning my smile or even my gaze instead he moves to take a seat far from me not once looking at me. I felt a wave of hurt rush through my body, why we he ignoring me? Was it because I didn't let him kiss me; is this the rejected Finnick Odair?

Well rejected or not he still had a duty as my mentor and I'd make sure he saw it through.

'' Shouldn't you give me advice on what to do today?'' I ask loudly so to catch his attention.

He turns to me but he's not entirely looking at me he seems…_**ashamed**_…he runs his hand up to his neck covering the strange bruise as he finally acknowledges me.

'' you already know what to do just flirt with the careers, smile and act vain make sure to show off your looks not your skill,'' he says almost bored his voice holds no charm not even a hint of arrogance its blank.

'' that's all?'' I ask

'' What more do you want? All you have to do is act like a bimbo it's not too hard,'' he says running his hand over his face tiredly.

'' it's just…'' I try speaking but he cuts me off

'' What Anwyn!? I have a headache the last thing I want to do is listen to million questions!'' he shouts making me jump as I stare at him wide eyed, why is he acting like this?

'' I'm sorry you're right how inconsiderate of me to ask questions when you have a headache,'' I say rising from the table and walking towards him, '' how rude of me to care about my survival when your poor head is bothering you believe me I'm sorry.''

I glare down at him before I make my way around the table towards the door but his hand stops me.

'' Anwyn I'm…''

'' Don't touch me!'' I growl pulling away as though repulsed by him,'' you don't have a right to touch me.''

He looks at me shocked and sad but I don't care I'm done with him I've had enough of him.

'' I'm sorry I…''

'' I'm tired of you Finnick from the moment you decided to mentor me you've been nothing but a thorn at my side I don't know how anyone can stand you! Are looks really that important that no one cares that you're self-absorbed and arrogant? You know the difference between you and me? The difference between us is that I'm more than just a pretty face while you…'' I look at him in disgust,'' you're nothing more than that.''

I walk away forgetting about breakfast just wanting to leave but before I leave I say one last thing.

'' I hope your beauty doesn't run out Finnick you're nothing without it,'' I finish looking at him but I instantly regret It when I see his eyes are watering but I don't stay to investigate I just leave him standing there.

I leave the suit but before I enter the elevator I hear a loud crash, I want to turn back but I don't…I can't.

As the elevator doors close I lean against the rail feeling the need to cry but I blink away the tears knowing I couldn't cry if I did the other tributes would think I cried because I was afraid. I bang me fist against the wall mad at myself for feeling like I did for feeling…guilty…why did I feel guilty I only told him the truth…but then why do I feel like everything I had said was wrong? He had yelled at me, he had acted like my life wasn't on the line, he…he…left last night… the bruise on his neck wasn't from a fight it was from one of his many lovers and for some reason that had hurt even more than him yelling or not caring.

How could we have shared so many moments last night and today ended up yelling at one another? The elevators ding takes me from my brooding announcing my arrival to the training floor it's then I notice I had completely forgotten about Lake, great just great I'd have to face the other tributes alone until he arrived. That doesn't matter I can't rely on Lake I tell myself especially not after last night I'm positive he sees me as a rival now more than ever. Before I step out of the elevator I fix my braid and pinch my cheeks to give them color as I make my way into the training room ready to start part two of my plan:_** Get in with the careers.**_

_**-sorry for the short chapter i'm already working on ch.8 and don't you all feel sorry for Finnick i think Annie is being a little cruel but dont worry we are getting close to a kiss ;) **_


	8. Chapter 8

**Enjoy! And please review the more reviews the faster I update!**

The room goes silent as I go in, all eyes are on me from the tributes to the game makers that sit above us to observe. I continue walking as though I didn't care that they were all staring a smirk on my face telling them I knew I was beautiful. I come to stand in the semi-circle the tributes had formed around Atla the head of training as she waited to give her welcoming speech. I look around noticing that none of the other girls were wearing the same outfit I was theirs was somewhat similar but not as revealing as mine. While they wore leggings I wore barely there shorts and our shirts only had the color in common theirs didn't have plunging collars, it was obvious why my outfit was different I needed to show off my looks and this did the trick.

I make sure I have an innocent look gracing my face as the other tributes look at my outfit while I simply twirl my braid and look down at my nails when I hear a voice next to me.

'' I don't know what to ask first what are you wearing? Or what did you do to Odair?''

Looking to my right I see Lake dressed in his own training uniform a smile plastered on his face as he looks down at me standing a little to close but I can tell what he's doing almost immediately. He's making it look like we were flirting making sure to attract attention. I give him my own smile turning my body completely towards him before running my index finger up and down his muscled arm inwardly smiling when I see his eyes following my finger.

'' this is what was laid out for me,'' I say making the phrase sound seductive as I notice most eyes are on us from the corner of my eye.

He pretends to give me a once over before giving me a toothy smile.

'' And Odair?'' he asks casually moving to stand even closer

'' What about him?'' I ask now running my finger down his chest.

'' If Mags hadn't stopped him he would've destroyed the dining room he even yelled at Vivia ,'' he pretends to whisper into my ear as though telling me a secret.

So that's why I had heard a crash before leaving what had he done I wonder and he yelled at Vivia too! I wanted to ask Lake more but instead I push him away and laugh loudly as though he had said something funny.

'' I didn't do anything I just told him how I felt about his attitude…he was being rude and I just said what I had to say.'' I say giggling my hand not once leaving his chest.

'' Rude? To you? How strange…'' he says looking at my lips just like Finnick had done last night.

'' Why is it strange?''

'' Oh come on Anwyn open your eyes you can't be this oblivious! Odair wants you that's why he chose to mentor you over me,'' he says looking at me as though I were an idiot but his smile never leaving his face.

'' He said he wanted to mentor me bec…''

''Because what Anne? Because you're different? Because you remind him of himself? Anwyn how many girls do you think he's said that to?''

I stare at him blankly how did he know Finnick had said those things to me?

'' how…''

'' I couldn't sleep you would've noticed me but you were too busy gazing at his eyes,'' he says sarcastically.

'' I wasn't…''

'' Oh please you should've seen your face while he fed you all those lies and you fell for it _**you**_ of all people, maybe it's because you're too kind or just plain gullible he had you eating out of his hand!''

''I…''

'' Why do you think he told you all that do you really think he cares about you? Of course he doesn't! Do you think he cares if you die or live? How will he help you if he's never brought back a victor?''

'' He said no one would listen to him that…''

'' Oh come on Anwyn he was trying to get you to feel sorry for him so he can get what he wants from you,'' he says calmly making sure no one can hear our actual conversation and instead think from our body language that we were flirting.

'' what he wants?'' I ask dumbly

'' I can't believe you're that innocent, he wants you in bed just like the rest of them and when he gets what he wants from you you'll just be another number on his list,''

I stare at him my smile frozen on my face but I can feel my eyes watering at his words.

'' I'm not saying this to be a bad person Anne I've known you since we were kids I care about you unlike Odair,'' he says pulling my face to his keeping up with the act.

'' Tributes!'' I hear Atla call, looking around I see the final tributes arriving coming to stand in our circle.

Remembering that we were giving them all a show I look at Lake's lips making him look at mine his eyes glazing over as he bends his head down just like Finnick had done last night. As soon as I feel his lips only an inch away I whip around to face Atla feeling his lips on the back of my head. From the corner of my eye I can see the district 2 male smiling at my refusal to kiss Lake. I make sure to leave my smile in place but inside I feel pained, was Lake right about everything? Did Finnick only tell me all those things so I would feel sorry for him and get in bed with him? I remember how he almost kissed me and how mad he was today, was he mad because I wasn't giving in to him? But his eyes they had seemed so sad, hurt…honest had I been wrong? Did he really lie to me? It's then realization hits me I knew why I couldn't stop thinking about him, why him leaving last night wouldn't let me sleep, why I felt sad when I saw him with Vivia…I had fallen for him…for his lies.

I feel my smile waiver but I don't let it fall, pushing away my emotions I try to focus feeling won't help me in the games only thinking will. I give Atla my attention but I make sure to act uninterested as I pretend to lower my top a bit more and then pout when I won't go any lower. Looking up from my breasts to Atla I notice all eyes are on me but I don't acknowledge them so far my plan is working I think to myself.

She explains all the different stations, from archery to knot tying. There is only one rule: Don't fight with the other tributes.

'' There will be plenty of time for that in the arena,'' she jokes

I hear a prominent chuckle and look around. It's the boy from 1, he's very good looking more so than the boy from , his hair color is black just like mine and he has piercing blue eyes. He stops laughing and looks around awkwardly no one else had found it funny. His eyes catch mine and he gives me a smile. I give him a once over, looking him up and down sending him a flirty smile. What an idiot I think either one or both of us will be dead in a matter of weeks and he's undressing me with his eyes. Clearly he hasn't straightened out his priorities out yet.

Atla finishes her speech and lets us get on with training. Most tributes rush to the weapons either wanting to learn or wanting to show off. I look at Lake who is still standing next to me surprisingly.

'' Look I know you chose to mentor separately but I think we'll be better as a team at least for the beginning especially if we get the careers on our side,'' Lake says as we walk away from Atla.

I look at him trying to figure out what his plan was wondering if he was trying to trick me but I find nothing behind his green eyes.

'' Look I know you don't want to trust me but if you're going to die it won't be because of me I just want you to have a chance unlike your mentor,'' he says looking down at me his eyes forcing me to trust him.

I continue to look at him wondering if forming an alliance was the right thing to do with him but then again he would be more trustworthy than the others I needed to form an alliance with. I wish Finnick…no Finnick wasn't any help I didn't need his advice I would make my own plan.

'' Allies,'' I say but the smile in his eyes makes me add one more thing,'' _for now_,''

'' For now,'' he repeats his smile never leaving his face,'' so what shall we do first?''

'' I have my own plan and I'm sure Mags gave you one so we won't be sticking together until we get into the career group,'' I say walking away from him, we were allies but I wasn't getting any closer to him then needed be I won't make any stupid mistakes because I knew he had a crush on me.

I begin with the simple things like knot tying which if you're from 4 you can do in your sleep the instructor only stopped staring at me long enough to tell me I was really good and same went for the hook section I was able to make a weapon out of anything all thanks to papa who was a weapons expert. It was annoying to have all the instructors stare when they were supposed to be helping me learn new skills but I kept my part giving smiles and looking up from my lashes at them. I noticed the female tributes were glaring at me especially the girl from five who might I say was a rather dumb she couldn't walk straight without tripping. I scoffed as I passed her ignoring her glare making sure to keep my head up high as though she wasn't even worth a glance.

I begin walking to the weapons station where most of the careers are scaring off the other weaker tributes I pretend to ignore them as I pass by them not even glancing their way as I pick up a dagger. I twirled it around in my hand knowing very well what I could do with it but my plan was to show off my looks not my skill at least not yet. I suddenly notice the boy from 1 push the boy from 2 back as he tried making his way to me growling something to him before he made his own way towards me. I quickly turn to the dagger and pretend to be admiring my reflection in it when I feel hot breath blowing into my ear.

'' That's not exactly how you're supposed to use a dagger,'' a silky smooth voice says from behind me.

I give him a glance before turning back to my reflection pretending to fix my hair not giving him any attention and it bothers him because I can see his glare through the dagger. After a few seconds more of ignoring him I decide he's had enough of the cold shoulder.

'' Why don't you show me then,'' I say twirling the dagger.

'' show you what?'' he asks trying to be seductive but I just roll my eyes before I finally turn to him.

'' how to use the dagger,'' I say simply, '' or are you just talk?''

My last comment sets him off; he quickly takes the dagger from my hand and flings it. The metal glimmers as it rotates in the air and effortlessly pierces the center of the dummies heart.

He turns to me and gives me a smile I return it with a seductive smile and a praising look.

'' nice shot,'' I say practically purring.

'' I always hit the bulls eye,'' he replies his blue eyes shining at my praise.

'' I can tell, with arms like those I'm sure your deadly,'' I say glancing at his muscled arms which to my amusement he actually flexes them, well someone has a big ego I laugh in my head.

'' And you're absolutely beautiful,'' he says looking me up and down it's just a face I say to him in my mind but reply differently.

'' I know,'' I say as though it was obvious before I turn back to grab another knife.

I hear him chuckle before he takes my hand in his I turn my head to face him giving him a question glance and an arched brow.

'' let me show you,'' he says pulling me flushed against his muscled chest.

As he guides my hand I raise my eyes to his face he's closer than needed be his nose is touching my cheek and his eyes are staring at my lips just like Finnick and Lake had done. Our lips are only a breath away from each other but when I think he will kiss me he turns to the dummy and flicks my wrist. The blade soars and lands directly in the heart just like his had done before. I smile and pull away clapping as though I had never thrown a knife in my life.

'' Yay!'' I say practically jumping up and down turning to give him a hug.

He smiles at me a twinkle in his eye as I pull away.

'' so who should I be thanking?'' I ask

He gives me a questioning look before his eyes flash with understanding.

'' how rude of me I'm Onyx district 1 and eighteen years old,'' he says putting out his hand to shake.

'' well thank you Onyx,'' I say looking at him from under my lashes and then I begin to walk away knowing he would follow.

'' you didn't tell me your name,'' he says blocking me from leaving

'' Anwyn,'' I say simply trying to walk away but he won't budge.

'' I think I deserve a bit more than that after I helped you,''

I give him a small huff before I reply,'' I said thank you and I think you already know I'm from 4 unless you didn't watch the parade and if you must know I'm fifteen.''

And just like everyone else he gapes at my age looking me up and down in disbelief.

'' Fifteen?!''

'' what can I say I got all this before the others did,'' I say waving a hand down my body, '' not like I mind though.''

He smirks at me giving me a small chuckle,'' you're very humble,''

I shrug,'' I don't like to lie my mother always told me to appreciate what life gives you and if life gave me beauty then I should appreciate it don't you think?''

He continue to smile at me before he replies,'' well don't mind me saying this but I think everyone here appreciates your looks too they haven't stopped staring since you walked in.''

'' And what about you? Have my looks attracted you yet?''

'' I haven't stopped staring since I saw you last night even my mentor Gloss is quite taken by you.''

''oh yes Gloss he was…charming but blondes aren't really my thing and he seems rather dull,''

Onyx lets out a laugh at this,'' he's pretty full of himself I think his sister is the brains in their duo.''

'' Cashmere is it? His sister I mean,''

'' yeah that's the one,''

'' Are you taken with her? I hear she's a hot commodity in the capital,''

'' Nah not my type coincidently I'm not into blondes either,'' he says giving me a look as he runs his hand down my braid.

'' How lucky for the girls that aren't blonde,'' I say pursing my lips

'' Ditto.'' He replies, '' so does a guy have to have any other hair color besides blonde for you to put interest?''

'' No he just has to keep my attention for more than a few minutes otherwise I get bored,''

'' like your district partner? I saw how you turned him down was he not to your liking?''

'' Lake is…like Gloss…strong, blonde, he has the looks but he's missing a brain.'' I say turning to look at Lake who at the moment was spearing a dummy while the other careers praised him.

'' He does seem rather boring and stupid but he has a good arm,'' Onyx says looking at the now speared dummy.

I hate him already for insulting Lake but so far he's eating from the palm of my hand why mess it up by defending someone I needed dead to insure my victory.

'' He's a career one of 4's best so I hear,'' I say to him almost bored

'' What about you? Are you a career?''

'' you could say that,'' I say and I wasn't lying my dad used to be a career and he had given me his knowledge but I wasn't going to full out say I had never trained a day in my life.

'' Join us then,'' he says simply

'' join what?''

'' Lunch, training, the pack,'' he answers as though it was the simplest thing in the world.

I smile inwardly bingo I had him where I wanted him.

I shrug and walk off before looking at him over my shoulder, '' why don't you join me.''

I leave him gaping I hadn't turned him down but I knew just by his eyes no one had ever talked to him like that especially not a girl, instead of joining their pack I told him to join me it was a deep dive but I knew it had worked.

There's nothing remarkable after my performance I go on with training doing the simple things and showing off my looks. Onyx returned to the other careers every little while giving me a look and staying a station away from me until Atla blows her whistle signaling lunch time.

I walk alone towards the lunch hall they had set up for us strutting through as if I owned the place. It's just as lavish as the dinner I had last night, long tables lined the walls as the tributes hungrily served themselves. I'm not hungry even though I had only had a few bites in the morning before I stormed out but I knew I had to at least eat a bit. I decided on a bowl of blue soup and a piece of seaweed bread just like the ones back home tainted green and in the form of a fish.

I sit alone claiming a table in the middle of the room and eat in silence once in a while dunking my bread into the soup until I'm disturbed.

'' Hello Anwyn,'' says the familiar voice. Looking up I see Onyx smiling down at me.

'' Hi,'' I say giving him a glance before sipping on my water.

'' These are the rest of the careers,'' he says

And sure enough, they plonk themselves on the seats besides me, clunking their plates on the table. To my left is a brunette with dark brown eyes. In front of me is the district 2 male he's decent looking I suppose he's overly muscled with dark blonde hair and hazel eyes and to his right is a blonde girl she's very pretty a typical district 1 female blonde hair, delicate features, and blue eyes just as bright as Onyx's. Next to her sits Lake it was obvious his showing off had worked he looks as much as a career as they do.

'' This is my district partner Amethyst,'' Onyx says taking the seat to my left and waving a hand in the blonde girls direction, '' that's Nerva and Valentinus from district 2 and you already know Lake.''

The girls don't glare at me but they don't really seem too friendly and Amethyst is too busy smiling at Lake. Valentinus is looking me up and down but a glare from Onyx makes him busy himself with his food.

I give them a silky hello and my fake smile I feel awkward and out of place with these people and Lake is too busy talking strategies and training with the others. Luckily the whole meal doesn't go this way as Onyx makes conversation with all of us making us share bits and pieces about ourselves. I find out that Onyx and Valentinus both volunteered for the games as did Amethyst but to my surprise Nerva had been reaped unlike most district 2 tributes.

'' How come district 4 hasn't had any volunteers these last years?'' Amethyst asks

Valentinus lets out a deep chuckle and responds before either Lake or I can, '' maybe it's because they always get killed off first.''

'' Nah it's because of Odair, Finnick Odair he can't mentor to save his life everyone back at training says they'll volunteer the day he stops mentoring,'' Lake says giving a chuckle of his own both Onyx and Valentinus laugh at this.

'' He does seem pretty useless I bet all he does is look in a mirror all day,'' Onyx says making everyone laugh…everyone but me.

I feel anger course through my body it was one thing for me to insult Finnick but hearing others laugh at him when he couldn't defend himself made me want to make them eat their words but I couldn't. And why should you defend him a voice in my head says he lied to you! I wanted to listen to that voice but I couldn't at least not entirely, I couldn't or didn't want to believe that he had lied to me maybe Lake is wrong besides he had never liked Finnick maybe he wanted me to hate him too. I decide to say nothing and keep my thoughts to myself even though inside I was seething.

'' I could have taken him,'' Valentinus says flexing his already bulky arms, '' he just won because of his stupid looks.''

Alright so what I did next wasn't keeping my thoughts to myself but I was done hearing how they thought they were better than everyone else.

'' you would have been thirteen and scrawny in his games,'' I say innocently looking at my reflection in the spoon, '' and he won because of his trident not just his looks though I can't say I mind his looks.''

Looking up I see Valentinus embarrassed and Onyx glaring down at me even Lake gave me a look but I didn't care this feeling surging in me was screaming to defend Finnick. A voice in my head shouted hypocrite and I knew the voice was right I had said so many horrible things this morning and now here I was defending the man I had insulted and humiliated.

'' I'm just saying he might be an idiot and way to into himself but he's easy on the eyes just like me,'' I say trying to appear uncaring.

Onyx laughs at this his icy glare melting as he looks down at me.

'' You're right Anwyn at least half right…you are easy on the eyes him on the other hand is overrated shall we say,'' he says daring me to against him with his eyes.

I know not to contradict him not if I wanted to be in with the pack so I simply shrug and finish eating luckily Atla blows her whistle signaling the end of lunch. I stand up in one fluid motion making sure to seem at ease with my body and just as I'm about to walk away I get what I've been waiting for.

'' You'll train with us won't you Anwyn?'' Onxy says much to the joy of Valentinus who was grinning at me behind Onyx's back.

'' And be in the career pack?''

'' Well yeah there's more than enough space for you,'' he continues glaring at the others into submission it was obvious he was in charge of the pack this year and he'd be my key to victory. The girls shrug and give me small smiles not wanting to feel Onyx's wrath while Lake and Valentinus just give nods but they're pleased.

I look at Onyx and give him a smile I'm sure it's cat like but I can't keep it off my face nor the thought running through my head, '' Oh Onyx you fell into my net and that will be your biggest mistake…falling for me.''

I answer them after a minute my voice practically a purr and I'm sure my eyes are bright with an unknown secret that only I know.

'' It'll be my pleasure,'' I say looking at Onyx's eyes while he looks down at me lustfully oh sweet boy how stupid could you be? Don't you know mermaids aren't kind creatures they only use others to insure the one thing they need most…the one thing I need most…_their survival._

Never believe a mermaids tale it'll only end in heartbreak.

**Sorry for the wait guys I've had finals and absolutely no time to spare but I hope you guys enjoy and review please. We are two chapters away from full on Finnick and Annie romance!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I own nothing sadly. Enjoy and leave reviews please just to warn you there will be angst and unfortunately some Vivia/ Finnick but it's all part of what I have planned.**

We train together after lunch Onyx stays by my side at all times much to Valentinus's anger who can't stop glaring at Onyx but says nothing as he slices through a dummy. This would be useful to me Valentinus's dislike towards Onyx maybe he'll turn against him in the arena they were big threats and who was I to stop them from killing each other. I stand watching Onyx decapitate a dummy with a sword he's amazing with it and I can see he's showing off as I look at him. Did he really think I was enamored by him? Did he not see that I was watching him to find his strengths and weaknesses not because I had a crush?

I don't do much besides looking at my reflection and silently analyzing the careers as they use the weapons making notes in my head. Nerva's weapon of choice was the bow and arrow she was quite good rarely missing the target but she wasn't the best and Amethyst used knives as her weapon she was agile but nowhere near as good as me she used to much of her body for the attack which left her defenseless in combat. Valentinus and Lake were easy to read they relied on their strength more than their weapons they both chose spears but it was obvious Lake was better after all he was a fisherman's son.

'' What weapon do you like to use?'' a silent voice rings through my ears it was almost hard to make out.

Turning I see it's Nerva she had barely spoken at lunch to any of us only speaking when Onyx had forced her to talk some.

'' I'm okay with a knife I suppose but I don't like to get dirty…''I say when I hear someone scoff turning I see it's Amethyst but she's soon silenced by Onyx's glare.

'' Is that it?'' Nerva questions doubtfully looking at me as though she knows I'm hiding something.

'' Enough with the questions Anwyn is part of the pack at that's final anyone has a problem you can leave,'' Onyx says coming to stand by me stretching his arm around my shoulders I knew what he was doing much to my disgust he was claiming me as his.

'' I was just wondering,'' Nerva says taken aback by Onyx's intensity before she walks towards the archery station once more.

Everyone turns back to their stations understanding Onyx meant business that he would really kick them out for me. He was willing to do all that for me how sweet of him if only he knew he was tightening the net around himself more. I turn to look up at him giving him a smile before kissing his jaw.

'' Thank you,'' I whisper making sure my eyes are sending him signals of a girl in love.

He shrugs grinning down at me, '' anytime,'' he purrs it's quite sickening but my smile doesn't waiver I had just added another part to my plan and it was to break the careers apart from the inside.

We stick close after that even more so than before he ''helps'' me with knife throwing I want to roll my eyes every time he tries to correct me or when he positions my body only wanting to touch me. The other careers stick together bullying the other tributes all but one, the boy from seven he keeps to himself even when we had lunch something in me tells me he's one to look out for even though he doesn't even practice with the weapons.

''you're turn,'' I hear Onyx say handing me a knife.

I take it feeling its weight and glancing at the target before I release it throwing it straight into the target: the heart.

'' Very good,'' he says clapping.

'' thank you,'' I say flipping my hair and smiling at him,'' it's because of you I don't know how to repay you.''

'' tell me your secret.''

'' what secret?'' I ask

'' Why you're so likeable. I know I'm supposed to kill you but I just can't help but think otherwise. You're beauty can't be so important to me that I've changed so drastically for you today.'' He says looking at my eyes as if there he would find the answer in them.

'' Some say it's my eyes or perhaps it's because you know I'm worth more than any silly crown.''

'' they're right about your eyes they're definitely something to behold but the crown…I've trained all my life for this…to volunteer and win yet here you are making me doubt everything.''

'' then maybe you should turn away from me…from_ us_.''

'' Us?'' he repeats the word as if though he had never heard it before.

'' Yes us. From the moment I saw you looking at me after the parade I felt something between us…I feel it now. Can you feel it?'' I ask him almost in despair I lean my body on his as if though without him I would fall.

It takes him a moment to answer but when he does I'm caught in full force by his icy gaze. He wraps his arms around me pulling me closer to his body.

'' Yes I feel it too. I wish we weren't in this situation we could have been good together.''

I lower my head to his shoulder and whisper in his ear feeding him the lie that will make him protect me in the arena but he's the key to a happy life in district 4 with my family besides all's fair in love and war.

'' I know believe me I feel my heart breaking but we can still be good together at least for now,'' I say as I hug him I feel him nuzzle my neck but he doesn't see my eyes he doesn't see I'm winking at Valentinus, he doesn't know that when I pull away to kiss his neck my eyes are on the boy from 2.

Valentinus was just as foolish as Onyx he smirks at me before happily walking away thinking that I liked him and I was only fooling around with Onyx. How wrong he was because the fact was I would use them both I'm not just a pretty face boys and you'll learn that soon.

Training is over for the day and I can't more grateful I was tired of smiling and laughing and pretending to be someone I wasn't. Lake and I ride in silence after the careers had made it to their floors after Onyx had kissed the corner of my mouth sending me a wink while I pouted pretending to be sad he hadn't kissed me. The silence is awkward but it soon ends when he breaks it.

'' So that went well especially for you Onyx is wrapped around your finger.''

'' he's leading the pack this year not district 2 I need him in what I have planned,'' I say shrugging

'' and what do you have planned?''

'' that's for me to know,'' I drawl

'' I saw you winking at Valentinus.''

'' And?''

'' Anwyn just be careful Onyx doesn't seem to be a guy that shares or likes to be played with,'' he says making me face him.

I arch my brow before responding,'' And what is it to you?''

'' you're playing with fire Anne and you could get burned.''

'' that's where you're wrong Lake there's no fire involved I'm simply swimming…swimming through the obstacles,'' I say before walking out of the elevator leaving him standing there.

No one is there to greet us much to my surprise I wonder where everyone is? Lake passes me ignoring me completely as he walks to his bedroom not caring that the suite is silent there's only Avoxes setting up for dinner. I decide to make my way to a shower feeling the need to bathe needing to rid myself of the person I pretended to be. But I had to do something first much to my ego's dislike I had to talk to Finnick without shouting and angry words being thrown and I needed to apologize for…for…I don't know for what but I felt the need to apologize.

I walk to his bedroom it's the last room down the hall three doors down from mine the door is closed it seems forbidding for some reason maybe it's because of who lies behind the door I think to myself. I stand frozen in front of the door forgetting how to knock I try walking away pretending no one is in the room but I know there is because I can hear noise behind the door. Finding courage I raise my fist poised to knock when I hear him when I hear…her.

'' Oh Finnick!'' a woman shrieks and I know who it is the annoying voice is easy to recognize it belonged to Vivia.

'' Faster…more…oh yes there!'' I hear her gasp and moan.

I can hear the bed hitting the wall repeatedly and I try to walk away to run but I can't my legs don't remember how to move.

'' I have nothing to forgive Finnick!'' she shouts I wonder if he'll go deaf with all her racket I want to laugh but I can't.

The grunts and moans continue until a final shriek from Viva brings on silence until I hear my name being called.

'' Anwyn?''

Turning around I see Mags walking out from her bedroom looking at me and then at Finnick's door.

'' Is there something you need?'' she asks

''um…I was…I just wanted to talk to Finnick but it can wait,'' I say.

Suddenly I hear someone practically falling off the bed and sheets being moved.

'' Finny what's wrong? Where are you going?'' I hear Vivia ask and then I hear rushed footsteps coming towards the door.

I don't want to see Finnick not anymore and I'm happy my legs remembered how to move because I rush to my bedroom almost taking Mags down in my haste as I see the door begin to open. Before I can safely close my door I see a glimpse of Finnick he's shirtless and his hair is in odd angles but it's the look of horror that I see last before I shut my door.

I rush to the bathroom wanting to wash away more than the feeling of Onyx's arms or the lies I told I wanted to wash away what I had heard in Finnick's room. I strip quickly and jump in under the freezing water not waiting for it to warm up. The water pounds against my tense muscles kneading them while I lean my head against the cool tile wanting to forget what just happened. My chest hurts it's almost like I can't breathe every thought of asking for forgiveness and wanting to understand him have vanished from my body but anger doesn't take its place…its hurt that does. I wash myself numbly trying to fight off these emotions trying to fight off the thoughts that won't leave me alone but it's useless. Why Finnick? Why is it that every time that I want to understand you to get close to you all you do is push me away with your actions?

The shower hasn't done anything to calm me not like I had hoped it would how is it that in only a matter of days my world has gone from being happy with a loving family to this to me being someone I'm not and feeling betrayed by someone that I barely know.

Walking out of the shower I dry myself just as numbly as I had when I showered. I don't look in the mirror tired of seeing my reflection as I dress almost blindly in a lounge pants and a simple cardigan. As I begin to comb my hair I hear the one voice I didn't want to hear especially not after hearing her do those repulsive noises.

'' Dinner dearie!'' Vivia says from behind the door just as she always did but this time her voice sounds hoarse I wonder why that is I think sarcastically.

I feel the want to strangle her tired of hearing her sickening voice and tell her to leave me alone and go be another notch on Odair's bed post but instead I call out to her.

'' I'll be there in a moment,'' I say

After taking a deep breathe I walk to the door and make my way to the dining room trying to calm myself and get ready to face my so called mentor.

Everyone is seated at the table everyone but Finnick. Mags and Lake are talking about training while Vivia listens politely. I'm sad that Pixie nor the prep team are here tonight it's just us not even Lakes prep team is here it's so different from yesterday when there had been laughter and cheers. I take my seat next to Lake not looking at Vivia how could I when I knew what she had been doing not so long ago.

'' Where's everyone?'' I ask and luckily its Mags that replies and not Vivia.

'' They're already setting up for the interviews finishing up on any final touches.'' She says before looking towards the sound of footsteps.

Finnick strolls into the dining area dressed in a crisp navy blue suit and white shirt the first few buttons open to reveal a bit of his chest he looks absolutely handsome and forlorn.

'' Oh Finny don't you look absolutely dashing I feel underdressed,'' Vivia says giggling, '' here I saved a seat next to me just for you.''

'' I'm sorry Vivia but I have plans for dinner tonight,'' he says before glancing at me only for a brief second.

'' oh where are you off to,'' she asks pouting

'' I have a date,'' he says simply before turning to Mags,'' I'll see you later Mags have a goodnight.''

And just like that he's gone not even looking at me with hate or sadness he had only glanced at me as if I were a dried up oyster. I feel eyes on me and I look to see Lake a smirk on his face as if telling me, '' see I told you.'' Oh no I feel that pain again and this time I feel the wetness in my eyes that announces tears and before they fall I quickly stand up.

'' I'm not hungry it's been a long day so I'll just go rest,'' I mumble as I rise and walk to my bedroom but not before I see Mags staring at me her brow arched in a questioning look but I ignore storming away from the table.

As soon as I'm in the comfort of the bedroom I fall onto the bed not even bothering to turn on the lights. I push my face into the pillows wanting to smother myself as I feel the tears begin to fall and they don't stop I can't make them stop. I don't cry because I'm away from home or because I miss my family more than anything I cry because Lake had been right at least for the most part I had fallen but not for his lies…I had fallen for _him_. I had done what most girls had done when it came to Finnick Odair I had let him charm me and believe his pretty words how stupid could I be! What had I done?

I cry just as I had cried on the train the first night until I cry myself to asleep and travel to a dream world where I see Finnick laughing at me as he tells me to get in line behind all the other girls and woman waiting to jump in his bed.

Darkness fills the room as I wake up feeling thirsty that's what had woken me my throat felt raw as if I had been in the 67th hunger games where the arena had been hot desert and most tributes had died of dehydration. My face feels clammy and my eyes are sore after hours of never ending tears. Standing from the bed I carefully make my way to the door trying not to fall over anything as I walk into the barely lit hallway. I notice I was still in my dinner wardrobe I hadn't bothered to change when I had jumped into bed letting the tears and sobs takeover.

I set the lights low in the dining area not wanting anyone to wake up I didn't have the strength to talk not at this moment. Taking a glass pitcher filled with water I pour some into a cup and drain it quickly feeling the rawness I had only seconds ago vanish the cool water quenching my thirst. Filling my cup again I feel as though I'm being watched looking around I see nothing but darkness the only light comes from the chandelier above the dining table and its set at its dimmest setting. But I can't shake the feeling that I'm still feeling watched quickly drinking my water I rush to my bedroom not bothering to change my clothes as I climb into bed trying to fall asleep but I can't. Sitting up in bed I hear footsteps and they come to stop at my door but no one knocks after a few seconds the steps move away walking down the hall, quickly walking to my door I open it in time to see Finnick entering his room before the door shuts silently.

Why did he stop in front of my door? Did he want to talk to me? Why didn't he? These were all questions running through my head but I didn't have the strength to knock his door down and ask them. I sigh and close my door returning to bed closing my eyes hoping that tomorrow will be a better day.

I feel a gentle touch on my face it runs smoothly from my cheek to my lips and it stops there as if it was a silent kiss. It pulls away immediately when I begin to stir I open my eyes feeling an ache at the loss of contact but what I see makes my eyes go wide with surprise.

'' Finnick,'' I say my eyes wide I'm sure as I see Finnick standing over me was he the one touching me?

'' what are you doing here?'' I whisper dazed rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

'' it's almost time for training you're running late,'' he says calmly as though he weren't standing in my room while I slept.

How long had he been here watching me sleep?

'' Late?'' I ask before I look around noticing the sun shining bright behind the curtains.

'' you have ten minutes, Lake is already on his way.''

'' Why didn't Vivia wake me?!'' I shriek as I rise from bed making my way to the closet in search of my training outfit.

'' She tried after a while we didn't hear you so I decided to come wake you up,'' he says shrugging.

'' How long have you been here?'' I ask turning to him.

'' only a minute or so…'' he says but I know he's lying his eyes tell me he's lying.

'' were you touching my face?'' I ask no longer caring I was running late my uniform forgotten in the closet.

'' No…'' he says but I don't believe him.

'' But I felt…''

'' it was probably your imagination I was about to shake you when you woke up…I hadn't touched you,'' he says but his eyes never meet mine and that gives him away.

'' right…it was probably _my imagination_,'' I drawl turning to grab my clothes.

'' Anwyn I want to talk about yesterday,''

'' I don't have time you said it yourself I'm running late.''

I try moving to the bathroom but he stops me stepping in front of me blocking my exit.

'' We need to talk,'' he says in a commanding voice

Sighing I look up at him, '' what do you want to talk about?''

'' I'm sorry. I had a headache and I had no right to take it out on you,'' he says looking sincere before he continues,'' I had business to attend to and it didn't go so well…''

He's having a difficult time explaining himself I can see it easily so then why is he trying to?

'' you don't have to explain yourself at least not to me,''

'' No I do because I'm tired of you doubting me of questioning me,'' he says his voice is marked with hidden hurt.

'' well I'm sorry if I don't see it right to treat you as though you were some god like the others do,'' I mock

'' See! Right there you never listen all you do is insult me and I've had enough of it,'' he says his eyes flash in anger as he steps closer to me.

'' I…''

'' No you listen to me I'm you're mentor whether you like it or not and I'm older than you little girl so you do as I say!''

'' How dare y…''

'' I dare because I can! You need to learn some propriety I'm a victor and you have to show me respect.''

I laugh but he quiets me by taking my face in his hand his fingers pressing into my cheeks.

'' I'm not joking,'' he growls

Pulling away from his hand I glare at him how dare he manhandle me?

'' Victor or not respect is earned not given I'm sorry if you always get what you want but respect from me won't be one of those things.''

He glares down at me but I don't wither under his gaze I stand tall glaring at him too.

'' you won't show me respect,'' he says almost in a bored tone

'' No.'' I say not backing down.

'' Do you forget I'm your mentor? That I'm the one that will ensure you have everything you need while in the arena? That if you're hurt I don't have to send you anything? You say you won't give me your respect but I'm your mentor and if you were a good little girl you'd see I'm the line between life and death,'' he mock stepping closer his chest taunt against my own.

'' Are you saying that you would let me die if I don't treat you like you supposedly deserve?'' I ask in disbelief not believing his words.

He shrugs, '' I don't know you tell me Annie sweetie would I let you die when you needed my help? You think you know me so well that all I care about is myself and I'm nothing but looks so you tell me seeing as you're all knowing would I let you die?''

I don't know what to say how do I answer him? So many emotions run through me most of all hurt runs through me. It's an incredulous laugh that answers for me.

'' You really think the worst of me don't you? Well you know what luckily for you I'm not such a horrid man I don't play with the lives of others but why do I even bother saying it to you? I'm done treating you like I do when I get nothing but you're disgust so I'll just treat you like I see fit. Hate me all you want but it doesn't change the fact that I'm your mentor and I'm not asking you to respect me I'm ordering you to do you understand?''

I say nothing as I look down but soon he grips my chin thrusting my face to meet his.

'' I said do you understand!'' he growls

''Yes,'' I whisper

He releases me immediately pulling away and running a hand through his hair as he looks down at me.

'' Go change you'll be late pass it off as you not caring about training and make sure to smile Annie the look you have on your face will leave wrinkles,'' he mocks

'' don't call me Annie,'' I whisper not looking at him

'' I'm sorry what was that?''

'' I said don't call me Annie my name is Anwyn to you,'' I say loudly but I feel my lip quiver as I speak.

He walks towards me and I instantly back away hitting the closet door and he follows placing his arms around me trapping me between the closet and his body.

'' If I want to call you Annie or honey maybe even sugar I'll call you that you're no one to tell me what to do am I clear_** Annie**_?''

'' yes,'' I say and to my horror I feel a tear make its way down my face but I don't make a move to wipe it away.

He notices the tear and he seems ashamed as if he finally realized who he was yelling at.

'' Anwyn…''

'' can I change now…I'm already late.'' I feel my lip tremble as I speak to him I force myself to be strong to say something rude but I'm in shock paralyzed to fight him.

His eyes look at me in despair pulling away from me letting me escape from his arms and the closet.

'' I want to talk about training when you get back,'' he says

'' okay,'' I say grabbing my clothes before practically running into the bathroom closing the door behind me.

I fall to the floor the tears falling as I angrily wipe them away I hear him closing the bedroom door as he leaves and its then I let a sob out its ugly and loud but I don't care.

I don't care that a voice inside of me is asking me why I was crying after being yelled at when yesterday I had done the same to him.

I don't care that I should be training and flirting and being everything I didn't want to be.

I don't care that my thoughts and heart are fighting against each other, my heart fights to tell me why I cried and why I felt drawn to him even when I tried to hate him but my mind is telling me to fight the feeling that is wrapping around my body and spills into my soul.

I don't care about the thoughts running through my mind.

I only care for a sentence from the stories I had told my sisters.

A sentence that meant nothing then but now it defines all the emotions and feeling fighting and pulling me apart.

_A mermaid only cries for a few things and when she cries you know she feels powerless the only thing that can make her shed tears is the thought of love and not having the one she loves._

**Thanks guys for all the well wishes on my finals and thank you for the love! So much angst dont you guys think? I'm already starting on the next chapter and I hope to post it asap maybe even tonight seeing as I don't have classes today. Just to let you guys know there's a kiss next chapter but who will be kissing who?**


	10. Chapter 10

**I own nothing!**

'' Argh!'' I cry as I fling the knife at the final moving dummy.

'' Are you okay beautiful?'' Onyx asks.

I roll my eyes at the sound of his voice why can't anyone leave me alone just for a few minutes. Spinning on my heel I turn to face him wiping the sweat from my brow as I look up at his concerned face.

'' I'm fine…just…'' I shrug turning to grab another knife but his hand stops me.

'' you can tell me anything Anwyn don't shut me out,'' he says turning me to face him again, ''you barely spoke at lunch and everyone was surprised that you barely even glanced at your reflection.''

I let out a small laugh and he smiles at the sound looking less brutal than he actually was.

'' you know there's something wrong when you don't even glance at yourself once it's not like you.''

Who would have thought that this strong vicious career would come to care so much about me well maybe I'll just use this to my advantage.

I let out a whimper as I wrap myself in his arms almost instantly I feel his arms tightening around me, perfect.

'' What's wrong Anwyn. Tell me.''

I pretend to shudder as if I were holding back sobs pushing my face into his strong chest this was too easy.

'' I had a fight with my mentor,'' I whisper.

He tenses beneath me and I fight to hold back a smile as he pulls me away to look at me.

'' Odair's your mentor isn't he? What did he do?'' he growls

'' He's an idiot. Here I am trying to fight for my life and all he wants to do is get me in bed. He was so rude to me today actually he's been nothing but horrible to me since after the parade just because I didn't let him kiss me. He won't understand I only have feeling for y…'' I blush turning from him letting out another whimper.

'' Say it Anwyn. You have feelings for whom?'' he says pulling me back as he lifts my chin gently raising my face to meet his.

'' I have feelings for you.'' I say softly and when he looks down at my lips biting his own I know what's going to happen next but I pull away the last minute.

'' But he doesn't listen to me! He says you're playing with me but I know what we have is real I just know it.''

'' Of course he's lying babe I've been nothing but honest with you…he just wants to put doubts in your head don't let him,'' he says taking my hands in his

'' I know Onyx you don't have to explain yourself to me I believe you.'' I continue making sure to look at his eyes as I push a black lock back from his forehead, '' I'm sorry if I've been so distant today it's not you but today Finnick said so many horrible things he…he told me if I didn't show him the _**respect**_ he deserved then he wouldn't help me in the arena.''

And that's the final straw in Onyx's book because his blue eyes are quickly engulfed in darkness and anger he seems ready to blow. He takes his anger out on the dummy decapitating it with his sword before he turns back to me I'm actually scared by the look that passes over his eyes it's deadly…crazy almost.

'' You don't have to show him any respect! You don't need him or his help all you need is me. I'll protect you I swear to you.'' He says taking me by my shoulders in an all but gentle hold.

I let out a bitter laugh,'' please Onyx you said it yourself you want to win the games you've trained all your life for this and for you to win I need to die.''

'' I don't care all I know is that this feeling inside of me is bigger than anything…it's bigger than some crown or bringing honor to my district I want you Anwyn…I need you and I'll do everything in my power to keep you safe in the games,'' his intensity surprises me he seems to be a man on a mission and who am I to intervene in that mission?

'' but…''

'' Trust me Anwyn if the crowns not mine then it'll be yours. Trust me.''

How sweet you'll do anything and everything to help me survive but the difference is I'll do everything to help you lose of that I'll make sure of.

'' Oh Onyx,'' I cry pulling him into a hug.

As we pull away I feel the inevitable coming as he begins to lower his face but just as our lips are about to touch the whistle sounds signaling the end of training. I quickly peck his cheek before turning to Atala who is about to speak.

'' Tomorrow as you know is the session with the Gamemakers where each and every one of you will be demonstrating your chosen skill to them I wish you nothing but the best as you are evaluated and then scored after that the rest is up to you. May the odds be ever in your favor.'' She finishes dismissing us knowing that the next time she sees us one will be victorious and the others will be returning in coffins.

Onyx leads me to the elevator where the other careers wait talking softly amongst themselves Lake and Amethyst roll their eyes as they see our hands intertwined but I pay them no attention knowing that as long as I had Onyx I was safe. As we step into the elevator I hug Onyx's arm leaning my head on his shoulder giving him a small smile as he jokes with Nerva and Lake about some poor tribute they had scared off. Amethyst is too busy gazing at Lake so no one pays me attention when my hand touches Valentinus who stands behind Onyx and I. Turning my face away from the others I glance back at him catching his surprised eye.

'' Hi,'' I mouth giving him seductive smile and right away his eyes glaze over oh god this was just too easy.

'' Hey,'' he mouths back running his hand over mine glancing at Onyx who stands oblivious to our little interaction.

I roll my eyes at the back of Onyx's head and make a face much to Valentinus's amusement who smiles back at me a spark in his eyes.

'' I wish it were you,'' I continue to mouth.

'' Wish I was what?''

'' With me.''

Smiling he then nods to Onyx asking me the silent question.

'' Useful.'' I simply mouth before running my lips over Onyx's muscled arm making sure to keep my eyes on Valentinus before looking up at Onyx who now gazes at me dotingly.

With a final wink at Valentinus I remain wrapped in Onyx's arms until we reach the first floor I pretend to be sad as he steps away from me making his way out the elevator before turning to me.

'' See you around 4,'' he smiles winking at me while I blow him a kiss.

When the elevator reaches the second floor Nerva and Valentinus say simple goodbyes and quietly walk out but before he did I run my hand down his back feeling his muscles shiver at the touch. He stops midstride but continues walking as nothing had happened sending me a small smile as he turns the corner.

The rest of the way to the fourth floor is ridden in silence Lake doesn't even try to reprehend me for flirting with both Valentinus and Onyx again but he looks at me as if disappointed with me. Let him think what he wants I'm ensuring my survival which he should be doing for himself instead of looking at me like a love sick puppy.

In a matter of moments we reach our floor and before I can make my escape to my bedroom I'm stopped by the one and only Finnick Odair who is leaning on the wall next to the entrance of the suite. He looks at me as if he had known my plan to go hide in my room until tomorrow not wanting to face him or anyone else and so instead of having to knock down my door he simply waited for me to get out of the elevator.

I huff showing him my displeasure at seeing him or maybe it's to hide the sad sigh that wants to make itself known but either way I don't feel strong enough to face him I have no fight left for him. Lake quickly makes his way around me and passed Finnick not even glancing his way as he walks inside the suite no doubt to talk with Mags like any good little tribute would do just not me. I walk out of the elevator with my head held high as I pass him but he follows I'd be surprised if he hadn't.

'' I thought we discussed you being polite _**Annie**_ or should I refresh your memory,'' I hear him drawl behind me.

I stop dead in my tracks and I form the fake smile I had become so accustomed to in only a matter of days turning to face him.

'' Evening Finnick,'' I say overly sweet it's completely sickening.

He smirks back at me before shaking his head at me.

'' Shall we discuss training?'' he asks just as overly sweet and polite.

'' do I have any other choice?'' I ask just as politely as he did.

'' No.''

'' then let's get this over with,'' I say emotionlessly done with the fakeness we were conveying.

'' Good. Shall we?'' he says before walking off towards the bedroom area.

I stay put not following him too in shock that he would think I would want to be alone in a bedroom with him. He turns to look at me when he doesn't hear me following after him just like all his other groupies would.

'' Aren't you coming?''

'' We can talk here,'' I say emphasizing every word.

'' Don't be a child I don't want to be overheard so let's go.''

'' Lake is probably with Mags so we'll be fine _here_.'' I say with as much force as I can.

'' And I say we go into a more_ private setting_.''

'' Well I say we stay here it's much more comfortable and…''

'' Sweetie if I wanted to get you in bed I would have done it by now don't you think?'' he says rolling his eyes but instead of walking off he plunks himself down on a lounge chair waving at me to do the same.

I numbly do as I'm told blushing at his comment how can he be so open to talk like that?

'' Well?''

I shrug not meeting his gaze.

'' Fine,'' I mumble.

'' Is that all?'' he raises an eyebrow at me.

''I did what you told me to do on the train. I showed off my looks and acted stupid everyone bought it.''

'' The careers?''

'' I'm in,'' I say simply meeting his questioning gaze, '' the boy from 1he leads the pack…he got me in.''

Finnick nods his head not saying anything for a few seconds.

'' Did you use some weapons?''

I nod, '' the dagger I acted as if I didn't know how to use it Ony…the boy from 1 he ''helped'' me learn.''

'' He seems to be close to you,'' Finnick says his eyes blazing with an unfamiliar emotion.

'' He likes me so does the guy from 2,'' I murmur.

'' What else? You're being too blunt.''

I shrug again,'' there's nothing else to say.''

I didn't feel like telling him of my plan with the boys and breaking the careers up it's not like he cared.

I hear him sigh before he speaks again,'' what about the other tributes did anyone catch your eye?''

'' Not really well maybe the boy from 7 he's…um…I don't know but he seems to be one to watch.''

Finnick nods again, '' I'll look into him.''

I hate how he's acting all cool and collected when only this morning he was pushing me up against the closet growling at me but then again wasn't I about to ask for forgiveness yesterday after I had insulted him?

'' What are the careers like?'' he asks breaking the silence.

'' The girls ignore me most of the time and the boys do the opposite especially Onyx he's always with me.''

'' Be careful with him don't start to like him or you will make mistakes put some distance with him.''

If only he knew I was playing my cards with Onyx and not falling for him but I'm hurt he would actually think that I would be crushing on someone when I should be fighting for my life.

'' I don't like him but he's useful I'm not stupid to make mistakes like having a silly little crush,'' I say angrily.

'' I wasn't calling you stupid I just want you to understand that _certain bonds_ shouldn't be formed. If you want to win he has to die…''

'' And you think I don't know that! Do you think I don't know that in a matter of days I'll be put into an arena to fight for my life! That if I don't play my cards right I'll be in a box being shipped back to 4! That we haven't had a victor since you! That you haven't done or even care to help me!'' I shout at him not caring of his warning to respect him, '' Believe me I know I have to mentor myself because if I let you help me I'll be dead.''

I leave him stunned as I storm off finally reaching my boiling point finally seeing the possibility of dying far from home. I run into my room locking the door behind me leaning against it for support my legs feeling weak and shaky. I slide down the door and onto the floor wrapping my arms around my legs wanting to feel some comfort but soon enough I hear his voice.

'' Anwyn open the door,'' Finnick says from behind the closed door.

I ignore him placing my head in my arms wanting to drown him out.

'' Anwyn don't be a child I need you to listen to me! Open this door now!''

'' Leave me alone!'' I cry, '' for once just leave me alone…go entertain Vivia and just…go.''

'' Fine you know what stay there but don't you dare say that I don't care for you! Don't you dare say that after all I've had to do for you!''

I turn to the door not understanding what he meant by that but I don't open the door or call after him as I hear his footsteps and then a door slamming shut all I do is sit on the floor letting my emotions and thoughts consume me.

And I sit there ignoring Vivia as she calls me for dinner ignoring the knocks asking if I'm okay because I didn't want to keep pretending and acting that I was okay because I wasn't. I ignore my stomach that grumbles begging for food and I ignore the pain in my legs as I walk to the shower wanting to feel the water as I reminder of my home.

I pretend that I'm under the waves searching for hidden treasures only the sea brings as I stand under the flow of warm water. I twist my hair wringing the water out just like I always did after a swim and I smile as I dry myself remembering the feel of the sand on my back as I let the sun dry me. These memories were pushing me to stop being negative to force myself to win because I had left behind so many things and I would be damned if I didn't get to see them again.

I call it a day choosing sleep over food as I dress in a soft lilac nightgown that falls above my thigh and gives an ample amount of cleavage. It's soft and silky against my skin and it's comforting it's what I need to feel relaxed as I lay in bed shutting my eyes and mind from the outside world.

I wake up just as I had last night but instead of thirst its hunger that wakes me my stomach twists in small amount of pain indicating its need for food. Pushing away the covers I leave my room just like I had most nights, it's been forever since I've had a decent night's rest. I maneuver the barely lit hallway easily and step into the dining room, the table still has some remaining food from dinner but I only take a roll of bread. Sitting down on a chair I rip pieces off it and eat them not giving the bread any attention as I look into the bright lights outside the window. The city is alive and beautiful but how can it look like this when behind the window I sit like a slave waiting for my execution.

I continue to look into the night only stopping when I turn to my empty hand I had finished the bread and hadn't even realized it. I let out a weak laugh are there really that many thoughts running through my head that I don't even notice what I eat? Has eating become robotic to me just like my smiles? I shake my head of the thoughts and decide to return to my room I had a big day with the gamemakers and this was make it or break it time if I wanted sponsors.

As I stand poised to open my door I hear what sounds like a moan but it's not like the one Vivia had given Finnick no this was a moan out of fear. I walk towards the sound hearing it get louder and soon I hear pleading but it's the voice that shocks me. It's Finnick.

'' Please…no…leave me alone…I didn't want to,'' the words become frantic and soon I'm racing into Finnick's bedroom swinging the door open. I search for the switch on the wall and when my hand comes in contact with it I press it illuminating the room on a low setting. What I see makes my mouth fall open in horror…in shock…in worry.

Finnick is tossing and turning in bed the sheets twisting around his body drenched with sweat. His voice lets out an animal like cry and I'm surprised no one else is awake coming to see what was happening. I close the door behind me for some reason not wanting anyone else in here but me. I quickly move to his side and touch his naked shoulder it feels overly hot as if though he had a fever and just like the sheets he too is wet with his sweat.

'' Finnick,'' I call out to him shaking him gently.

'' leave me alone…please…NO!''

'' Finnick! Please wake up it's me Anwyn. Please wake up.'' I beg as I run my hand through his soaked hair.

He stills at my touch and he seems to be relaxing as his screams come to seize before I'm met by scared and utterly beautiful green eyes.

'' Anwyn?'' he asks unbelievably not expecting to see me.

I pull away from him as he begins to sit up looking away when the sheet falls to his waist leaving his naked chest open to my gaze.

'' I'm sorry I just came in here I heard you and I…um…I'm sorry,'' I say feeling my face go red and hot.

'' I should be saying sorry to you that I woke you up,'' he says running a hand over his face.

'' I was already up,'' I say almost too quickly, '' I was just getting back from the dining room when I heard a moan…when I heard you.''

'' Well thank you…for waking me…I…thank you.'' He says looking at me as if I had saved him but in a way I had I saved him from his nightmare hadn't I?

Silence fills the room it's unsettling for us not to be at each other's throats or him trying to flirt with me but somehow this silence makes me see him better because this silence is filled with nothing but sadness. His sadness is the only emotion in this room and in the edges fear fights to have control. Looking up from the duvet I glance at his heartbreaking face it's just as handsome as always but it's sad, lonely, and lost in the nightmares that had plagued him. I wish I could say something to ease his fears as I had always done with my sisters but with him I was just as lost as he was.

'' I should go,'' I say moving to stand from the bed but a hand on my elbow stops me.

'' Don't go. Don't leave me alone.'' His anguished voice echoes through my ears as he begs me to stay but I only look at him my mind and heart fighting each other debating what I should do. But I'm tired of thinking and I know I couldn't leave him not now, I try convincing myself that if it were anyone else I would stay but I know that that's not entirely true.

'' I'll stay,'' I whisper and I almost smile at the childlike look he gives me as he makes room for me but then I want to kick myself for what I say next, '' until you're more calm.''

He nods but his face falls at my words and I wish I could take back the last four words but before I can he startles me with an odd question.

'' Can you sing for me? I've heard you before…your voice is very calming…it reminds me of my mother she used to sing to me before she died.'' He whispers and I don't know what surprises me more the fact that he's heard me sing or that he just revealed something about himself to me…about his mother.

The look on his face makes me forget any of my doubts to be here or the questions I want to ask him, it's the child in his eyes that makes me do something I had never expected to do especially not for Finnick Odair.

'' Yes. I'll sing for you.'' I say and the innocent smile he gives me is worth all my uncertainties.

He lies down nestling into the pillows as I l lay beside him tucking my legs underneath me remembering I'm barely clothed but at this moment I couldn't care less…not now…not with him waiting innocently and patiently for me to sing. I run my fingers through his soggy hair trying to soothe him as I begin to sing as I sing for him.

_No more talk of darkness__  
__Forget these wide-eyed fears__  
__I'm here, nothing can harm you__  
__My words will warm and calm you_

He runs his fingers over my necklace playing with the pearl as I sing to him softly.

_Let me be your freedom  
Let daylight dry your tears  
I'm here, with you, beside you  
To guard you and to guide you_

I look down at him as moves his hand from my necklace and onto my wavy hair but I don't pull him away I simply sing.

_Say you'll love me every waking moment  
Turn your head with talk of summer time  
Say you need me with you now and always  
Promise me that all you say is true  
That's all I ask of you  
_I notice his eyes begin to close and his hand becomes still in my hair.

_Let me be your shelter  
Let me be your light  
You're safe, no one will find you  
Your fears are far behind you_

His eyes finally close and his face is serene he looks so young as he sleeps I think to myself as I gently take his hand from my hair and place it on his abdomen. I run my hand down his face and I continue to sing not caring that he's asleep not caring that the next words I utter are from my heart and not just part of a song.

_All I want is freedom  
A world with no more night  
And you, always beside me  
To hold me and to hide me_

_Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime  
Say the word and I will follow you_

_Love me, that's all I ask of you._

I end the song softly pulling away from him looking down at the young victor. It's then I remember he's only nineteen that he won when he was a child that he lost his parents in an inexplicable accident. Here in bed he seems so alone this isn't the charming and arrogant Finnick Odair this is a lost boy that was raised by his mentor and had no friends back home except perhaps the other victors.

'' you're a broken soul aren't you?'' I ask as I push a lock of hair from his face.

I gently move off the bed careful not to disturb him but a pleading voice stops me.

'' Don't go. Stay with me the night.''

Turning I see Finnick awake the fear back in his eyes as he looks up at me.

'' I can't,'' I whisper.

'' please Anwyn I promise I won't try anything I just don't want to be left alone,''

Closing my eyes and then reopening them I make my decision as I walk to the door ignoring his heartbreaking stare.

'' An…''

He stops talking when he sees me turn from the door as I turn off the lights and walk back to his bed using the light of the moon to guide me. He pulls the duvet back as I lay down beside him again his eyes surprised but he quickly recovers as he wraps the blanket around us both. We face each other as I rest my head on a feather soft pillow just gazing at one another before I run my hand down his arm and begin to sing to him again lulling us both to sleep.

It's a surprise to wake up so refreshed and at ease no nightmares or thoughts plaguing my mind just peace and quiet. I nuzzle my face into my pillow but I quickly stop when instead of being met by a pillow I'm met by hard muscle and the blanket that folds around me are arms strong and tan arms. Pulling away gently I see I'm wrapped in Finnick's arms while he sleeps peacefully and innocently as a baby. Gently moving Finnick's arms off me I sit up looking down at him how can someone that has killed and slept with half of the women of the capitol look so pure?

I run my hand down his strong jaw over his nose and cheek before stopping at his lips wondering if they were as soft as they looked. Looking back at his eyes making sure he was still sound asleep I do something that I would never have done but suddenly now I felt the urge to do. I lower my lips to meet his and kiss him softly but as I pull away I feel a hand on the back of my head and I'm met with bright sea green eyes.

'' Don't stop,'' he says and before I can react he pulls me down for a kiss and I'm nothing but obligated to respond.

_Because a mermaid always responds to a kiss._

**You may now all jump in joy! Happy early Christmas hope you guys enjoyed! Lots of love please review and thanks again for the love!**

**P.S. I used parts of the song All I Ask of You from the Phantom of the Opera I think it was a fitting song for them.**


	11. Chapter 11

**I own nothin****g if I did Finnick would have his own book & movie. Thank you for all the reviews and enjoy!**

The kiss is soft and gentle yet strong and passionate I feel completely powerless to resist it and unable to end it. My lips seem to be working on their own accord moving against his as if they had always been meant to as if kissing him was their sole purpose. I feel Finnick rolling us over so that I'm nestled among the pillows and under his body never once breaking the kiss. A half of me tries fighting what was happening but my body and mind were unresponsive. What was happening? What was I doing? Those were the questions fighting to make their way into my head but the only question that mattered to me was: why hadn't we done this sooner?

But the answer to that question was easy it had nothing to do with not wanting to but it had everything to do with the fact that this wasn't just any boy I was kissing this was **_Finnick Odair_** the capitol's womanizer. This was a boy that could only offer me a secure place in his bed but nothing more just as he did with all the others, this kiss probably meant more to me than it did to him. It's that thought that brings me back to reality and away from the softness of his lips I couldn't allow this kiss to continue because I knew that deep down lay a hidden emotion within me and in him there was only lust. It takes everything I have to break away from him but in the end I do.

'' No.'' I say trying to push him away as I struggle to sit up.

But Finnick is strong and he doesn't want to end the kiss just yet.

'' What? No.'' He says pulling me towards him as he tries to kiss me again.

'' Stop! Let go of me Finnick.'' I beg pushing at his chest before I'm finally free.

I stand from the bed quickly practically falling off of it in my haste to escape from him before I surrendered myself to him again.

'' We should…I shouldn…I'm sorry,'' I stutter running to the door.

'' Anwyn! Wait!'' he says trying to untangle himself from the sheets before finally freeing himself to stand just as I run out of the room and towards my own.

I could hear him coming after me but I don't look back as I run into my room locking the door behind me.

'' Anwyn please open the door we need to talk,'' he whispers from behind the door.

I stay quiet and completely out of breath not knowing what to do or what to say.

'' Anwyn open this door. Stop being a child.'' He says again rattling the doorknob.

'' Anw…''

'' Finny! Whatever are you doing?'' I hear Vivia say as her heels click against the wooden floors.

'' Vivia! Umm… I was just trying to wake up Anwyn I needed to talk to her before the gamemaker secession,'' he lies only stuttering at the beginning.

'' Well seeing as you are already waking up our little beauty I'll just go wake up the other dearies and then we can have breakfast I'll save you a seat right next to me,'' I hear her purr and instantly I remember this is the reason our kiss was a mistake because Vivia is living proof of his affairs.

'' Of course Vivia let me just talk to Anwyn and I'll catch up with you,'' he says simply his voice free of its usual purr and charm.

I can't hear Vivia's response but soon the hall fills with her annoying giggle and her heels scratching against the floor as she walks off. When the sound dies I feel the door shaking alongside its knob.

'' Anwyn please let me talk to you we can't just pretend nothing happened,'' he whispers his voice begging me to do as he says but I know if I do I'll succumb to him.

I run my hand down the door and over the knob wanting so much to open it but I'm too scared to admit my real feelings towards him but I'm even more afraid to see him play with me and then toss me aside.

'' Fine don't open the door but sooner or later you'll have to face me you can't hide in there forever.'' He whispers harshly.

I know he's right this room isn't any sort of protection it can't hide me from the games, my fate, not even from him. I'll have to face him eventually but right now…right now I can be a coward and hide.

'' Anwyn don't be afraid of me. Don't regret what happened believe me I don't you mean more to me than you think.''

I look up from the doorknob where I had been staring for the last minute as he spoke. What did he mean by that? Why was I important to him? Before I have time to get my thoughts in order and try to speak I hear his footsteps walking away from my door and then a door closing before silence consumes me.

I hit my head against the door as if it would help me straighten out my thoughts and help me understand the events of the last few hours. I groan into the wooden door laying my head on it soothing the headache I now felt. Why did I kiss him? How could I have been so stupid to have kissed him?

Sighing I push away from the door and ignore my thoughts today wasn't the best day to think about anything else but the scoring session I'll deal with Finnick later. But taking Finnick out of my thoughts was easier said than done because even the smallest of actions remind me of him. As I brush my hair braiding it I remember Finnick's hand running through my curled locks or when I look in the mirror and see my lips are swollen and a dark pink I recall his lips on mine. Closing my eyes I touch my lips smiling as I remember our kiss…my first kiss who would have thought my first kiss would have been with **_the Finnick Odair_**.

My eyes snap open at that final thought quickly pulling my hand away from my lips I shake my head trying to clear my head. Snap out of it Anwyn a voice yells in my head. It was just a kiss…my first kiss but to him it was just another kiss probably one of hundreds or more that he had received. Glaring at my reflection I walk away from the mirror and dress yelling at myself for acting like one of the many girls back home that crushed after him but I knew this wasn't just a simple crush I could feel something bigger behind it and it had to stop I had to stop it.

After I had finished dressing I take a deep breath and let it out trying to calm myself before walking out of my room if I was lucky I could grab a small bite to eat and make a hasty escape. It seemed that for once luck had been on my side the only one occupying a seat at the dining table was Mags other than that Finnick was nowhere in sight.

'' Good morning Mags,'' I say politely giving her a small smile before I take a seat in front of her.

'' Good morning sweetie,'' she replies giving me a kind smile just like the one my grandmother used to give me before she passed away.

I feel shy under her green gaze it seems knowing of everything perhaps it's because she has seen so many things through her long life but the way she gazes at me is as if she can see right through me.

'' It was kind of you what you did last night,'' I hear her say stopping me from grabbing the jar of juice.

Shocked I look up at her. Did she know? Did she know about the kiss? Of course she didn't know about the kiss it just happened today.

'' What you did for Finnick it was kind of you to take care of him,'' she continues smiling at my shocked face.

'' I just woke him up…I didn't…I mean I…he had a nightmare so I…'' I try speaking but everything I say comes out as mush apparently I was becoming a gibberish talking idiot.

'' Either way thank you for going to him he gets so scared with his nightmares it takes me a while to calm him down but you did wonderfully though I can't say I'm surprised that you did.''

I look at her confused but she doesn't give anything away as she takes a bite from her fruit salad.

'' Why aren't you surprised?'' I ask forcing her gaze to meet my own.

She sighs setting her fork aside as she looks at me almost exasperated as though I was an idiot for not understanding anything.

'' Anwyn do you really not see the extent of Finnick's feelings for you?'' she asks impatiently.

'' I…he doesn't…what feelings?'' I ask stupidly.

'' Anwyn all I can say is that you need to stop this attitude with Finnick he doesn't deserve you're rejection not him of all people.''

'' Rejecting him? Mags I'm only acting the way he…''

'' Anwyn the way he acts has an explanation but I can assure you he's never treated you with anything other than respect…''

'' Respect? Mags yesterday he yelled at me and before that he's acted as if this was a party and not a battle for my life he…''

'' You think he doesn't know you might die and that he might never see you that he'll never get a chance to…'' she cuts off as if though she catches what she's about to say.

'' A chance to what?''

'' Ask him this isn't my place Anwyn but all I ask of you is that you talk to him and listen to what he has to say and then you'll see how wrong you have been by judging him.''

I want to ask more as I sit there probably looking like a fish with my mouth open but before I can speak I hear footsteps. High heels click against the floor followed by heavier steps but before they enter the dining area Mags says the one thing that has been running through my head since Finnick had said it.

'' _He cares for you more than you know,''_

I look at Mags as she says that one phrase that makes me forget everything and makes me wonder so much. As I look at her while she takes a sip from her cup I see in her eyes that she's telling the truth that she knows a hidden secret and if I stopped acting like a child throwing a tantrum then I would discover everything.

'' Good morning dearies!'' Vivia screeches as she walks in followed by Lake but I'm oblivious to their presence I don't hear what they say or do there's only one thought running through my head.

_He cares for you more than you know…_

_I care for you…_

_More than you…_

_Know…._

_He cares for me…_

_More than I know…_

My head is spinning I feel ready to faint as a voice repeats the phrase almost like a mantra, those eight words are the only things running and claiming my mind. I don't know what to do all I know is that I need fresh air or just to get out of this suite and it's when I'm met with beautiful sea green eyes that I make a run for it. I know we have to talk and I want to but right now I need time to think because I know everything I've said and done against Finnick have been wrong and I don't need him or Mags to tell me otherwise I just know.

'' Anwyn dearie where are you going?'' I hear Vivia ask but I ignore her sickening sweet voice tired of it and her.

Finnick tries to block my way but I'm smaller and faster so it's easy to get away and to the door I hear him calling after me just like Vivia had done but I can't turn around not yet at least because I was not ready to face him.

As I leave to the elevator I hear Lake calming everyone but I can tell his voice is worried because I know he sees me pale and wide eyed as if something had happened.

'' She's probably worried about the session I'm sure she'll be fine.''

When I'm in the safety of the elevator I grab onto the rail just like I had the first time when I had yelled at Finnick. This was never part of the plan how could I feel so much for a boy I barely knew for a boy that enjoys falling into bed with whomever he pleases.

'' _That all has an explanation…''_

Mags voice is clear in my head telling me what I already knew from the moment I realized his eyes and his personality had nothing in common from the moment I saw he was a broken soul. There was more to Finnick Odair and it was time I let him explain and I would listen for once I would listen to him because the sad boy in him deserved my attention.

And I would listen to him but right now I needed to focus on the scoring secession this was another step in my plan to get the gamemaker's attention and to show I was deadlier than I looked. As the elevator comes to a halt I put on my smile the mask I need to wow and impress to make them believe I was nothing more than what they saw. Walking out of the elevator I see I'm not the first one there and much to my displeasure Onyx is one of the few there cracking his knuckles and neck. I want to roll my eyes at his stupid display but he catches my eye immediately and all I can do is smile and walk to him wrapping my arms around him.

'' I'm surprised you're here early,'' he says hugging me close.

'' I thought you'd be here and I couldn't wait to see you,'' I lie.

He smiles at me as if what I had just said had made his day.

'' I missed you too,'' he says nuzzling my hair it reminds me of Finnick and how he had nuzzled me after the parade but it felt wrong with Onyx this felt disgusting.

I pull away discreetly pretending to fix my hair.

'' Onyx you'll mess up my hair,'' I whine.

He chuckles before brushing a curl behind my ear and I want nothing more than to pull away but I don't I couldn't let him see I didn't feel a thing for him. Oh no he's looking at my lips again and there's no Atala or a reason for me to pull away but it seems I'm having luck today when I hear the loud boasting voice of Valentinus as he strolls in. Onyx looks ready to kill as he glares at my lips and then at Valentinus and the other careers that soon join us.

'' Next time,'' he whispers touching my lips.

I pout and make a face hiding the relief I felt at the interruption but his warning that next time there would be a kiss makes me shake.

I cling onto his arm as we wait for the secession to begin we pass the time talking and Onyx continues to glare at Valentinus while the others scare off the smaller tributes. I pretend to be uninterested in the secession staring at my reflection in the steel panels when we hear the first name being called.

'' District 1 Onyx Steale report to individual assessment,'' a voice announces through the speakers.

'' Guess I'm up,'' Onyx says pulling away from my hold.

'' I'd say good luck but you won't need it,'' I purr in his ear.

He smirks at me and gives me a wink as he walks off but not before he glares at Valentinus bumping into him and it had nothing to do with an accident.

As he leaves Valentinus glares at his back before turning to me I roll my eyes at Onyx's back and mouth '' idiot''. Valentinus gives me a smile before turning to Nerva who was busy bullying the district 3 female tribute.

Twenty minutes pass and then Amethyst is called she smirks s she struts off knowing she'll get a good score. Looking around I see Nerva and Lake are discussing weapons or maybe it's tactics while Valentinus sits alone on a steel bench alone deep in thought. Making sure Nerva is distracted I walk over to her district partner and sit down next to him getting his attention as I place one leg over the other. He stares at my legs before looking up at me smiling at me crookedly.

'' You seemed lonely I thought you needed a little company you don't mind do you?'' I ask making sure to lose him in my eyes.

He stares at my eyes before shaking his head from his daze.

'' No not at all I could never say no to your company,'' he says looking me up and down.

'' That's a good thing because I want nothing else than to be in yours,'' I purr smiling at him shyly.

'' And Onyx don't you like being in his company?'' He asks arching his brow.

'' I told you Onyx is useful,''

'' For what?''

I shrug looking at him as if it were the simplest thing ever, '' now that would be telling but he leads the pack and I rather be in his good grace than having his sword in me.''

'' So it's a survival tactic?''

'' somewhat yes,'' I say,'' but I'm actually a bit scared of him.''

'' Scared of him,'' Valentinus repeats, '' with the way you act around him you don't seem afraid.''

I huff pretending to be mad at him for not understanding,'' have you seen him he's not exactly a cuddly pet I'm scared what he would do if I rejected him if he knew that I had my eye set on y…'' I widen my eyes acting as if I had made a mistake.

'' Set on who?'' he asks his attention now fully on me.

'' It doesn't matter…it's not like I had a chance with him anyway.'' I stare at him as though he were a treasure I couldn't have.

'' How do you know you don't have a chance with him?'' He asks knowing I was talking about him.

'' Onyx he'd never let us be together he made sure of that when he claimed me,'' I say,'' I'm afraid he'll hurt…you.''

Valentinus looks up from his hands quickly his eyes wide in wonder as he stares at me.

'' You care that much about me?''

'' Of course I care about you,'' I huff pretending to be offended with the question,'' how can you even ask me that haven't you seen the signs I've given you?''

'' Like defending Odair and contradicted me or maybe how you hang off Onyx's arm.''

'' I told you Onyx is useful and he's frightening,'' I whisper angrily.

'' And how you defended Odair?''

'' I was mad at you,'' I shrug.

'' Mad?''

'' Mad at how you did nothing to stop Onyx from making the first move with me I just wanted to hurt you or try to be rude so I could forget about all these feelings.''

'' Well it's like you said Onyx isn't exactly the nicest guy to go against and I need in with pack.''

Bingo. So he needs in with the pack well here's my chance at spinning my own thread of doubt in his head.

'' You know I was actually surprised at how easy it was for Onyx to take control of the pack usually it's the other way but I can see he scares you now,'' I say mocking him and his response is just what I had hoped.

'' I'm not scared of that idiot,'' he growls,'' I'm just waiting for the right moment.''

'' The right moment to what?'' I ask arching a brow.

'' To take back what I think should be mine,'' he replies his tone dark and his eyes red with rage.

'' District 2 Valentinus Warden please report to individual assessment,'' the voice announces overhead.

Valentinus looks up at the speaker and then stands up but not before I whisper in his ear one last thing.

'' I can help you take down Onyx let me help you,''

He looks down at me searching my eyes for a lie for the trap but I'm sure to keep my eyes blank of any emotion.

I take his hand in his making sure no one is looking before standing up on my toes and pressing my lips to the corner of his mouth keeping my eyes on his.

'' Trust me Valentinus I want him gone as much as you do and then you and I can be together,'' I whisper pulling away and sitting down ignoring his gaze before I hear him walk off.

You're doing well Anwyn don't stop now I tell myself as I let out a breath I hadn't known I was holding.

I sit in silence ignoring everyone until I hear Nerva being called and soon after I feel more than see Lake sitting next to me.

'' What!'' I say tired of feeling his gaze on me.

'' Anne I don't know what your plan is but I just want you to be careful Onyx isn't someone you want to be up against and neither is Valentinus…''

'' I've told you before I know what I'm doing you and I are only allies in the arena when the careers try getting rid of us other than that I'm on my own,'' I whisper yell turning to meet his stony gaze.

'' And I'm not stopping you all I'm saying is _be careful_ I care about you since I was a boy please just…just be careful.''

'' You say you care about me now but that will change when you are trying to slit my throat in a few days,'' I say sadly.

'' No that will never happen if you die it won't be by my hand I care about you too much,'' he says quietly staring into my eyes making me feel uncomfortable but the loud speaker saves me.

'' District 4 Lake Vanlil please report for individual assessment.''

We look around noticing that both tributes from district 3 had already left while we talked, sighing Lake stands ready to leave.

'' Anwyn I'm not lying or playing with you believe me when I say I care about you.''

Looking up I'm too late to say anything as he walks off leaving me alone.

Great just great why did he have to say that to me? How could I let him die when the time came when I had grown up with him? Maybe I shouldn't join the careers maybe I should do this on my own.

'' And how long would you last?'' A voice in my head questions bitterly, ''Do you really think Onyx would let you out of the alliance without killing you first?''

No leaving the careers was out of the question and so was choosing Lake's life over my own, friendships and crushes end in the games but deep down I knew I would never kill Lake…I just couldn't.

I sit waiting silently for my name to be called but it feels like torture as the minutes tick by slower than ever. When I'm ready to pull out my hair the loud speaker buzzes to life.

'' District 4 Anwyn Cresta please report for individual assessment.''

Standing up I gracefully walk towards the door glancing at my reflection one last time before giving myself words of encouragement.

'' Showtime,'' I whisper as I stand in front of the door where behind lie the Gamemakers.

Inhaling and exhaling I walk in and I don't need my beauty to make an impression because tripping and falling flat on my face makes that easy. In my haste and worry to do well I had lost my balance hitting my face hard on the floor.

'' Use this to your advantage!'' My mind screams.

Standing up quickly I giggle loudly.

'' Sorry!'' I call out to them laughing like a brainless idiot.

Looking up I see one of the Gamemakers smiling at me, a wink in his eye. He's the youngest out of all of them and he's actually quite normal almost handsome even with his interesting shaped beard.

I continue walking to the knife station, talking to myself like a mad girl.

'' Well you've already messed this up Anwyn you and your clumsy feet!'' I say loud enough for them to hear.

A large array of knives lay in front of me picking one up I instantly twirl it in my hand gazing at my reflection.

'' My Anwyn aren't you beautiful,'' I coo at my reflection before I hear someone clearing their throat loudly.

Looking up I see the head gamemaker an old man with blue curls and a blue mustache to match waiving his hand at me to continue and next to him the young gamemaker hides his smile behind his glass.

'' Right…um okay…here goes nothing,'' I say as I throw the knife towards the moving dummy.

The knife spins and twirls reaching its destination. Bulls eye the knife sticks proudly in the dummy's heart. And it's then I let myself go and do what I know, what my father taught me and what Finnick had told me to do. I show them what lies behind my pretty face.

Knife after knife I throw each time landing in the heart never once missing. I feel sweat running down my breasts and a few beads on my forehead as I dance to my own rhythm. The dummies speed up when only two remain it's hard to follow them but not impossible.

'' _Your eyes can deceive you but your ears are your real ally they hear what the eye can't see.''_

I remember my father's words as I look at the dummies closing my eyes I fondle my final knife before throwing it hoping it would meet the mark. When I hear a solid thud I open my eyes and I can't stop the smile that graces my face at what I see I had hit both dummies spearing them with my knife.

'' Dismissed!'' I hear a loud voice echo through the room.

Looking up I see the gamemakers all staring in astonishment at the pierced dummies that lay on the floor. The head gamemaker simply stares at me giving nothing away but it's the young one that smiles at me as if praising me.

'' Thank you,'' I say turning on my heel and walking out with my head held high and my back rod straight.

But before I close the door I give the young gamemaker a wink and a sultry smile. Surely that will give me an extra boost if he likes me and he did seem rather important more so than the others.

I walk back to the elevator in silence my smile never leaving my face feeling sure that at the most I would receive a nine hopefully even a ten. As the elevator ascends to my floor I think about how I would face Finnick we needed to talk that was clear and I would listen just like Mags had told me to do. I just needed to find the right moment for us to talk away from Vivia and Lake and anyone else that puts doubts in my head.

Exiting the elevator I enter the suite and just like last time there was no one in sight just the Avoxes setting up the dining room. I'm happy that there's no one especially not Finnick I couldn't face him just yet especially not all sweaty and nasty.

'' And why does it matter how you look?'' A voice questions me in my head.

Ignoring the voice I make my way into my bedroom ready to jump into the shower and wash away all the grime I felt. I strip quickly and stand under the cascading water washing my hair and body but as I wash my face my fingers stray to my lips and I close my eyes as I remember Finnick's kiss. I feel my body come to life as I recall his hands on my waist and the feeling of his body over mine of how well we fit together.

Opening my eyes I pull my hand away from my mouth and continue to wash myself trying to recollect my scattered thoughts but it's impossible to forget that kiss and what transpire before it. Quickly rinsing I step out of the shower and dry myself walking back into the bedroom ready to dress myself. I choose a simple cream toned long sleeve mini dress accompanied by sparkly gold flats to wear ignoring my mind as it asked why I was dressing up or for who was I dressing up.

As I tied my hair back in a fishtail braid I hear the ever annoying voice of Vivia calling me for dinner like always. I walk out of the bedroom looking down the hall towards Finnick's room wondering if he would be joining us for dinner if he would sit next to me as I received my training score. I don't have to wonder for long as I walk into the dining area and see Finnick sitting next to Mags whispering silently to each other. I'm also surprised but happy to see my prep team talking happily while Pixie sips on a blue drink.

Pixie is the first to notice me standing up to give me a warm hug a hug I didn't know I needed until I feel myself hugging her back tightly.

'' I don't know what's happened these last days but you can tell me anything,'' she whispers before pulling away.

I simply nod as I'm quickly pulled into hug after hug from my prep team as they tell me how much they've missed me. I smile at them not being able to hate their happiness or be annoyed by their loud voices they were just being themselves. Sitting next to Pixie I avoid Finnick's gaze and immerse myself in what the prep team has to say and they have lots enough to keep me distracted.

'' Oh you'll just love what Pixie has created its divine!'' Demitria says happily.

'' Demitria hush you don't want to give anything away it's a _surprise_,'' Lucianna says glaring at Demitria who pouts before starting up again in her childlike voice.

'' Any who there have been major trend changes one being sea green is the new it color and the sales of animated contact lenses have gone up!'' she says looking at me.

'' I wonder why!'' Afton giggles.

Anwyn Cresta a trend setter. Who would have thought?

The dinner goes by with non-stop talk about capitol affairs and even more new trends I don't even mind Vivia saying how it was about time district 4 was recognized for being the most beautiful of districts. The conversations keep me occupied and away from the stare I feel burning a hole in my face we even try getting Lake to join in our conversation but he's his usual silent self.

Soon enough dinner is over and we move to the living area ready to see what fate the gamemakers had planned out for us. I strategically sit in between Pixie and Afton much to Finnick's dislike as I get a glimpse of his glare.

Ignoring his glare I turn to the screen where a short introduction starts followed by Caesar Flickerman welcoming everyone to the scoring as he talks happily with Claudius Templesmith. And then the scoring officially begins. Amethyst receives a nine while Onyx receives an eleven they must be beaming on the first floor I can already imagine Onyx as he stands like a peacock after hearing his score. Nerva to my surprise receives an eight a low score for a career followed by a nine for Valentinus I was positive no one was happy on the second floor these are probably the lowest scores received by a district 2 tribute. The girl from three gets a four while the boy gets a seven his score isn't one to admire but it makes me wonder what he did to get it.

'' Here we go,'' Vivia says sitting up straight her eyes never leaving the screen.

Lake's face appears on the screen quickly after the girl from three's score is read.

'' Lake Vanlil,'' Flickerman reads and pauses dramatically before giving the score,'' receives a score of ten!''

'' Congratulations'' and '' cheers'' ring through the room but Lake seems unfazed as he continues to stare at the screen.

'' Here's a girl no one would mind scoring!'' Claudius says loudly as my picture appears on screen.

'' Control yourself Templesmith!'' Caesar chastises before smiling,'' though you're right I think the gamemakers had a field day with her!''

I blush at how they openly discuss me wondering how my family was handling all this_admiration_.

Luckily my discomfort comes to an end soon after as they get on with the scoring.

'' Anwyn Cresta with a score of…''

I feel my heart racing as I wait for my score my hands balled up in fists when I feel Pixie's hand on mine comforting me. I send her a quick smile before facing the screen again.

'' eleven!''

What? My head shifts to the screen and I stare at the glimmering two digits. An eleven? Am I dreaming? I'm definitely dreaming but then why is everyone standing up and cheering?

'' You did it!''

'' Oh my…''

'' Wow!''

I stand frozen until I feel strong arms wrapping around me and hot breath blowing against my ear.

'' You did it mermaid.''

Looking up I see Finnick's handsome face adorned with a smile as he gazes down at me and I can't stop myself from smiling back at him. But all too quickly we're pulled away from each other by Vivia who hugs me cheering in my poor ear.

'' I knew you were amazing! I'm so proud!''

Luckily I get to pull away quickly as we continue to watch the scores not wanting to miss any of them. The girl from 5 that hates me gets a 3 much to my pleasure I hadn't expected anything higher than a five she could barely stand up without falling. The other scores range from six's and seven's except for the boy from seven, Kas he receives a ten. I need to be careful with him whatever his skill was it had to be amazing but I'm sure Onyx was already plotting how to kill him.

As the show ends kisses and hugs are passed around again, mainly for me. Pixie holds me the longest praising me for my excellence and telling me how she knew from the moment she saw me I would leave my mark on the games. Mags hugs me too kissing me on the cheek before giving me a meaningful look and then one for Finnick. Lake gives us a goodnight before walking off in silence to his room following the others.

Finnick, Vivia, and I are the last ones standing in the living area as we look at the retreating backs of the others. I feel awkward and not at all ready to face Finnick so I coward out besides Vivia was on him like a jellyfish.

'' Well goodnight,'' I say trying to make my escape.

'' Wait Anwyn I need to talk to you,'' Finnick says pushing away from Vivia.

'' I'm tired but we can talk tomorrow,'' I say before rushing off ignoring his death glare.

I quickly make it into my room blocking out the squeals and giggles coming from Vivia's mouth as I shut my door. I walk happily to the dress hugging myself in praise of my score. I just couldn't believe it I had expected a nine maybe even a ten but an eleven this made me a career. I had earned a career score!

Humming to myself I dress in a light blue nightgown that reaches my thigh and decide to unbraid my hair letting it fall gracefully down my back and over my breasts in its natural curled form. I slip into bed once I'm done ready to sleep peacefully but to my surprise I'm wide awake. Minutes pass as I try coaxing myself into slumber but my mind decides it doesn't want to shut off. I toss and turn but when I've finally had enough I sit up and decide to walk around the suite hoping it will make me feel tired. I quickly grab a matching blue robe to tie over my nightgown and slip on a pair of slippers before exiting the room.

It's quiet just like I had expected it to be when I enter the living area the only essence of light comes from the buzzing city that apparently never sleeps. I look around the suite wondering what I could do to make myself drowsy when my eyes connect with the main door that leads out of the suite. I wonder? Is it locked? Looking around to ensure I was alone I make my way to the door and turn the handle. It opens without resistance. Again I look around before slipping out of the suite walking towards the elevator.

I honestly didn't know what or where I was going or doing but I felt a pull deep within my chest and as I stare at the panel adorned by buttons that lead to a certain floor I feel a much bigger pull to the roof. I press the last button on the panel without hesitation and soon the elevator moves in motion quickly passing the other floors until it reaches its destination. When the elevator doors open I realize immediately what the pull in my chest had been because as I see the unmistakable figure of Finnick Odair I knew it was him pulling me here.

Because his presence somehow always pulls me to him and I'm incapable of resisting it.

**Sorry for the wait guys but Christmas is a very busy time of the year for me and my family but here's a belated xmas present you all deserve! Next Chapter expect full on romance and a conversation that will make our dear Annie realize how wrong she's been. Review and tell me what you think please! Lots of love! Sorry guys for the hold up if you were not able to read it the actual day I posted it.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you guys for all the support in this story and Happy New Year! I own nothing as usual.**

He's standing with his back turned to me gazing at the bright lights of the Capitol not once looking away or giving any sign that he knows someone is here. I feel frozen as I stare at him the lights dancing on his tan skin he looks utterly handsome and yet he seems more alone and sadder than ever. I can't see his face but the way he stands with his head bowed and hands in his pockets is different from the tall and proud peacock that usually strolls around showing off his beauty. I want to go up to him but what would I say? How can I ask him to be honest with me? Why can't I just stop acting like a child and finally face him?

'' Because you're a coward! First you yell at him and then you're kissing him when he's asleep but when you need to face him you want to hide like a scared mouse!'' that annoying voice in my head yells at me again.

I sigh knowing that the stupid voice is right like always it's not that I can't face him it's that I'm too much of a coward to face the feelings I feel for him and to realize just how wrong I have been. And like usual I decide to run and hide because as of now that's the only thing I know how to do. I try slipping away quietly back towards the elevator but I'm stupid enough to think a victor who once slept with his eyes open to ensure his survival in the games wouldn't hear my steps.

'' Don't go,'' a melancholic voice drifts through the wind and into my ears.

Those two words are what stop me they aren't easy to resist and truth be told I was done resisting the pull that only he had on me. I don't want to fight him or this feeling that surges through me ordering me to stop this childish game and for once just listen. I feel my feet moving before I'm able to comprehend what I was doing and soon I'm at his side. He doesn't look at me as he stares at the city he hadn't even turned when he called me he just simply knew it was me. Seconds pass perhaps even minutes before he finally turns his bright gaze to me silencing any thought of hiding or running with just that single look.

'' Anwyn…''

'' Finnick I…''

We laugh awkwardly as our words bump into each other but somehow they create a beautiful and unique melody together.

'' Ladies first,'' he smiles down at me.

'' Thank you,'' I mumble before taking a deep breath to calm my racing heart,'' Finnick I wanted…I wanted to apologize…umm…for the kiss we shouldn't…I shouldn't have kissed you it was wrong a mista…''

'' It wasn't a mistake,'' he says cutting me off,'' the only mistake was that I should have kissed you first.''

I stand silenced by his words not knowing how to respond back.

'' Finnick please let's just forget all about…''

'' No! You can't just kiss me and then ask me to pretend like nothing happened!'' he yells angrily.

'' It's for the best…''

'' The best for who? For you? When are you going to stop acting like there's nothing going on between us?''

'' There is _nothing_ going on between us!'' I yell but my words only make him see red.

'' That's a lie and you know it! If there was really nothing you wouldn't have kissed me or stayed the night with me…''

'' I stayed with you because I felt sorry for you…you were scared and I…''

'' You felt sorry for me,'' he repeats the words glaring down at me,'' Did you also feel sorry for me when you kissed me? Is that what you do go into men's rooms sing to them and then kiss them before you run off?''

'' No! I…''

'' You know I hear a lot of jumbled words coming from you but I don't hear you denying your feelings for me,'' he mocks grabbing my waist pushing me closer to his body.

I try fighting against his hold as his lips come closer to my own I can feel my labored breathing as I fight to control my racing heart.

'' Why does it matter what I feel for you? I'll just be another number to you like the others,'' I say before his lips touch mine.

He instantly pulls away and if looks could kill I'd be dead before even setting a foot in the arena.

'' What did you say?'' he growls tightening his hold on me.

'' You heard me,'' I say weakly scared of the way he's looking at me; surely he wouldn't hurt me for saying the truth would he? '' It doesn't matter _if_ I cared for you all I know is that the most secure place you could offer me is in your bed.''

He releases me immediately almost as if my words had burned him and turns away from me pulling on his hair before turning back to face me.

'' That's what you think of me? That all I want is to get you on your back?'' he asks looking at me in disbelief.

'' It's what I know,'' I whisper,'' why would I be different from all the others we've seen for years talk about the joys of being with _**the Finnick Odair**_?''

'' No,'' he says shaking his head looking around crazily as if looking for inspiration as if the words he needs will be brought by the breeze,'' Anwyn believe me you're _**different **_they…you…you're nothing like them.''

'' You're right I'm not like them because I won't jump into bed with you when you say I'm different or that I remind you of you or maybe when you say I mean more to you than I think,'' I repeat his words that had made me a fool in his hands,'' how many girls have you said those words to Finnick?''

He continues to look at me emotion after emotion flashing in his eyes as he tries but fails to speak.

'' It must be difficult that for once in your life there's someone that you can't woo to spread open her legs for you. Why does it matter if maybe just maybe there could be something between us when you'll give me the _pleasure_ of your company for a few hours before moving onto the next one?'' I say feeling myself break apart under my own words as I say them but what I don't expect is for him to say the one thing that finally shuts me up.

'' Sweetie you wouldn't be able to afford a night in my company you don't have that kind of money in your pockets,'' he says looking at me bitterly.

I stare at him open mouthed just gaping trying to fully understand his words but at the moment I feel my thoughts becoming more and more jumbled up to the point that they're incoherent. Is he saying what I think he's trying to say? If he is Anwyn Cresta you may now jump off this roof.

He laughs bitterly as he pushes back his unruly hair before looking at me again,'' Do you want to hear that I fuck them? Do you want to hear that I'll sleep with whoever pays the right amount as long as the few people I care about are safe? Or perhaps you want to hear the story of how a fourteen year old boy would become the plaything of the Capitol the moment he turned sixteen and when he said no his parents died mysteriously in a boat accident?''

I'm sure by now I look like a moron with her mouth wide open and oversized gaping eyes but at that moment the only thing I cared about was the horror I felt running through me as he spoke every word.

'' The difference between you and those_** people**_ is that every time I have to be with _them_ I want to die and I beg for this stupid life to finally be over but when I'm close to you I feel that there's hope. When I look at you I feel that I could have a reason to continue on with my miserable life and how I feel my heart breaking at the thought of never being with you!'' He shouts looking ready to fall apart before whispering one last thing,'' If I ever got you in bed I know I wouldn't be able to move on from you because if we ever made_ love_ there wouldn't be anything better than you.''

'' Finnick…'' I try speaking but I can't form the right words I'm lost at to what to say. I want to believe that this is lie but I know it's not because his eyes never lie and because Mags had somehow given me the answer I needed all along.

'' _The way he acts has an explanation,''_

Mags's voice rings clear through my thoughts those seven words scream at me telling me how stupid I was for not discovering the truth behind his fake laugh and smile sooner.

'' I'm a whore Anwyn I sleep with people the people Snow sells me to and in return I guarantee Mags's safety, district 4's, and…and yours,'' he whispers more to the open sky than to me.

'' Me?'' I ask dumbly.

'' You really don't understand do you?'' He asks laughing humorlessly,'' You want to know why I chose to mentor you over Lake it's because I don't care if Lake dies as long as your safe back home I will choose you over everything and everyone!''

'' I've been on my knees for you trying to make you see how much I care about you but all you think of me is how self-absorbed and vain I am. I've humiliated myself for you and all I get in return is your hatred but you know what I don't care because hatred is just as strong as love and it gives me another reason to despise everything in this stupid world,'' he continues before a tear rolls down his chiseled face, '' besides why would a whore ever get the one girl he's cared for since he was a boy?''

'' What?'' I ask not understanding his last sentence only feeling the urge to wipe away his tears.

'' I didn't know then how much I would come to care for you but now I know. I didn't realize that the little girl that was crying by the water wondering why she couldn't fit in with our district would be in my every thought from that moment on.'' He finishes looking down at me as he gently takes a curl in his fingers mindlessly.

'' I…we…''

'' You don't have to say anything it's obvious you care so little for me you can't even remember or don't want to remember that I wasn't always an idiot that only knew how to look pretty. You know what just forget it and forget everything I've told you tonight all you need to hear is that tomorrow I'll be a perfect mentor I'll say all the right things and forget about how stupid I am for falling for the one girl that wants nothing but to be far from me.''

I want to speak the voice in my head is screaming at me to finally say something but my thoughts and words don't want to be voiced I feel mute and incapable of speech.

'' Why are you saying all this now?'' I finally ask stupidly finally breaking from my speech impediment.

He lets out a sad chuckle as he walks closer to the edge of the roof and away from me,'' because for once I thought I could get something pure and that if I told you the truth you would finally realize you feel something too because I know you do you wouldn't have kissed me pity or no I know you would never just kiss someone on random.''

'' Finnic…''

'' Please just go and leave me alone I can see now with your silence and how you look at me that you don't care for anything I have to say you don't care about…me.''

'' No that's not…''

'' Just. Go.'' He says emphasizing the two words before glaring at me,'' I don't want your pity just go on and hate me like you've been doing from the moment you got on that train.''

'' Finnick please listen…''

'' Why should I listen to you when all you've done is judge me? I'm through with being the nice guy I'm done pretending! For once in my life I just want to be alone so go! Leave!'' He yells pushing me towards the elevator.

I look at him wanting so much to scream the words I know are bubbling within me but my throat feels raw and unable to force them out all I can do is feel myself backing away from him as he turns me towards the elevator gently pushing me inside it. I see him leaning with his hands on the edge of the roof sobs raking his body and it's then I remember…I remember that one meeting years ago…I remember the tears being wiped away…I remember him.

_**Flashback**_

'' _Why are you crying?'' A soft boyish voice says from beside where I sit on the sand._

_I turn to the owner of the voice and behind my blurry teary eyes I can see a handsome boy no younger than twelve already taking on the appearance of a young man. He sits next to me placing his net full of fish on the sand besides him alongside an old battered trident while he looks at me with bright and happy sea green eyes._

'' _Well?'' he questions as I continue to stare at the beautiful boy feeling myself go red under his gaze,'' why are you crying little fish?''_

_I sniffle not knowing if I should talk to him after all mama had told me to never speak to strangers but he seemed harmless with his dimpled smile._

'' _It's just…no one likes me at school all the girls pull my hair and are mean to me,'' I sniffle again feeling the tears falling once more,'' they say I'm weird and that I'm ugly.''_

_He lets out a laugh at my last words interrupting me before he speaks,'' You? Ugly? Have you ever looked in a mirror do you even own a mirror? Those girls just said that because they're jealous of you.''_

'' _Jealous?'' I repeat innocently as I look up at him._

'' _Yeah you're beautiful and they hate that if it makes you feel better most boys hate me,'' he says smiling at me._

_I look at him in astonishment surprised by his words because who could ever hate him? He was the perfect representation of a district 4 citizen and even more._

'' _Boys hate you? Why?'' I ask not able to keep the wonder away from my voice._

'' _Same reason girls don't like you they're all jealous I guess at least it's what my mom says,'' _

'' _But you fit in with your hair and your pretty skin I…I have ugly hair and I look sick with my skin color,'' I say sadly._

'' _That's not true there's nothing ugly about you sure you're different but I like different and I wouldn't change a thing,'' he says in a no nonsense voice like the one papa uses on occasion._

'' _You wouldn't change a thing?'' I ask in hope as I look up at his sea green eyes._

'' _Not a single thing,'' he says shaking his head and when he looks like he's about to say something else he seems to finally notice the fish at his side before jumping up immediately._

'' _Oh no my old man is going to kill me if I'm late with the fish,'' he says more to himself than to me as he grabs the net and trident off the sand before turning back to look at me._

'' _You should go too it's getting late I'm sure your parents will be worried if you want I can walk you home,''_

'' _No its okay my house isn't far I wouldn't want your parents to be mad at you,'' I say standing up and dusting off my white dress before picking up the basket that lay forgotten on the sand._

_He looks at me and then at the fish as though he couldn't decide what to do but in a matter of seconds it seems that he has decided._

'' _I'll walk you home I don't want anything happening to you,'' _

'' _No the fish will go bad and you'll get in trouble I promise I'll be fine I can take care of myself,'' I say puffing out my chest trying to act older than I was._

_He looks at me amused at my act and not at all convinced,'' a small thing like you please.''_

_I glare at him mad at his assumption that just because I was a child I couldn't take care of myself if he knew my papa had already taught me how to use weapons after all this was Panem we lived in._

'' _And just because you're a career you think you're stronger than me,'' I say trying but probably failing to look intimidating as I give him what is supposed to be my father's glare._

_He holds his hands up in defense while a smile tugs at his lips fighting to make another appearance._

'' _You're a feisty little thing aren't you? All right then I won't bother to offer my gentlemanly manners seeing as they're not appreciated but I'll let you know most girls would die at this kind of chance,'' he says pretending to look faint._

'' _Well I'm not most girls,'' I say fiercely walking past him when I hear his charming voice ring through my ears._

'' _No you certainly aren't like most girls little mermaid.''_

_I don't stop walking as I hear his words but I do smile and for some reason I have a feeling that this boy would be special but special to me and I don't even know his name but I'll never forget his eyes. As I walk to my house I have a feeling that I'm being followed but whenever I look behind me there's no one just the average stray cat looking for food but I just can't shake the feeling not even when I walk up to my house. But before I can fully close the door I catch a movement in the shadows spotting what looks to be a trident gleaming dully in the small amount of light coming from my home. It's him I know it is I can feel it he had followed me not caring about his fish or his own safety only caring about a girl he consoled not even knowing her name._

'' _Goodnight,'' I whisper into the darkness before I shut the door completely not waiting nor expecting a reply._

'' _Anwyn there you are! Where in Panem have…''_

_**End of Flashback**_

I never saw him after that day even when I spent most of my free time waiting in the same spot where he had found me but he never came and yet I never stopped waiting even when I thought I had. It's then when I realize why I had never stopped waiting not even when I found out the boy that had washed away my insecurities was the capitol's playboy it was because I knew he would always be worth the wait.

As the elevator door begins to close hiding Finnick from my view I know what I had to do and without a single thought I move my hand to stop the door from closing. Walking from the elevator I don't think, I don't speak, and I don't hear because what I do next is me only feeling and nothing else. Grabbing Finnick by his arm I force him to turn and ignoring his questioning look I do what he wanted, what I wanted, and what we both needed I kiss him with all the passion and care I could muster.

His lips were firm and warm on mine, but motionless and closed. His hands made no move to touch me remaining still at his sides while I wanted nothing more but to feel their weight, their warmth. I could feel his confusion and reluctance as my lips continued to move over his own unmoving ones but that doesn't stop me as I wrap my arms around his neck pulling at his hair gently. I hear him give a soft groan deep in his chest and soon I feel the weight of his lips followed by his hands pulling me even closer to his body. Finally I think to myself as I smile into our kiss when I feel one strong arm wrapping around my waist while its twin cups my head tangling his fingers into my hair. Our lips move as one and our kiss is anything but soft it's demanding and passionate and…is he pulling away?

'' What are you doing?'' He asks removing my arms from their place around his neck taking them in an all but gentle grip.

I look up at him making sure that in my eyes he can find the answer and the truth behind the words I say next.

'' You're wrong I care about you too I have since I was a little girl if I didn't I wouldn't have waited every day for you in that same spot of so many years ago even after all this time I still did. I didn't kiss you because I felt sorry for you I kissed you because I wanted to because I…''

He doesn't let me finish because in a matter of seconds I'm silenced by his lips crashing on mine claiming even the air I breathed. Now this kiss was everything passionate, loving, caring, and so many other things I can't explain and I don't care to. At this moment as he runs his hands over my cheek, through my hair, and down my back I didn't care that he was my mentor or that we might never have a future because I didn't want to think anymore all I wanted was to feel. I wanted to feel him as he took my every thought and made me feel like there was nothing more important than this kiss…than _us_. His lips make me forget everything and they take me to a world where there are no games, no Capitol, no forced prostitution, no Vivia or Lake or Onyx there's just _us_.

I could feel myself sighing into his mouth as he fought to pull me closer and his groan of frustration when it wasn't possible to be any closer. My neck was cramping as I leaned up trying to meet his height but he was just too tall and even on my toes I was still a little more than half a head shorter. He notices almost instantly as if he was attuned to my body and its comforts and discomforts because before I can think I feel nothing but air beneath my feet as he lifts me gently by my waist and up to his height. And this is my favorite part of it all its not kiss or how we fight to get closer it's not even how we both smile into our kiss it's how we seem to belong together no matter what the future will bring. Because he's given me another reason to fight to survive my fate he gives me hope and right now that's all I need.

_Because when a mermaid can't end a kiss it's because she's found the right lips to kiss._

**Sorry for the wait guys I just wanted this chapter to be everything you guys asked for and more I hope you enjoy it because this was by far my hardest chapter to write. Already working on the next chapter might even post it today as a gift for all the reviews and love this story has gotten. Thanks again and please continue to read and review!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Sadly I own nothing. Enjoy!**

I feel someone rolling me over gently followed by the distinct feeling of strong knuckles running over my cheek and then soft and warm lips coming in contact with my own. It's more than a peck but not really a kiss and yet it feels more intimate and romantic than any other kiss we had shared.

''Good morning,'' I whisper as he pulls away opening my eyes to see him smiling down at me lovingly and adoringly.

'' Morning beautiful,'' he replies before claiming my lips once more making me giggle as he takes me by surprise.

I can't help but think just how perfect and natural this feels as if we had always been meant to be together there are no more doubts or insecurities last night had made sure to erase all those.

'' Finnick,'' I try saying around his mouth nudging him gently.

'' Hmm…'' he mumbles into my mouth not wanting to end our kiss.

'' Finnick,'' I giggle as I feel him laying his body down on mine carefully as to not crush me.'' Finnick Odair!'' I squeal finally getting his attention.

'' What?!'' He growls playfully,'' Can't you see I'm busy?''

I laugh softly and move my head to the side as he tries to kiss me again making him pout but I can also see a flash of fear pass through his eyes. Oh no he thinks I'm rejecting him that I'm rethinking what we were doing. I give him a shy smile and run my hand over the side of his face gently making sure that he can see everything I feel for him in my eyes everything but doubt he's made sure to wash that word away with everything he's made me feel.

I peck his lips sweetly before pulling away to look at him,'' You should go I'm sure Vivia is bound to be up by now and she can't know you're in here.''

'' But I don't want to go I'm quite comfortable here thank you very much,'' he says teasingly as he holds me flush against his strong body.

'' Finnick you said last night we had to be careful that no one should know about us. What do you expect the others to think if they see you coming out from my bedroom?''

'' Let them think what they want meanwhile I'll just kiss you a bit more,'' he jokes kissing the swell of my breasts making me blush.

'' Finnick please I don't want them to think we…'' I try finishing the sentence but I feel my face going red before I can even say the last words.

'' They'll think we what?'' He teases giving me his dimpled smile before dropping his head to kiss my shoulder smiling as I move my head to the side sighing when I feel his lips running over the delicate skin of my throat.

'' Please,'' I say pleading but truthfully I don't know what I was pleading for perhaps it was for him to stop and go or maybe it was for him to keep going and never stop.

He stops kissing me and comes up raising his body to hover over me caging me between his strong arms and under his naked chest.

'' You know they wouldn't be wrong with their assumptions we did technically sleep together,'' he says trying to appear serious but he fails because the humor in his eyes give him away.

'' No we _fell_ asleep together we didn't you know…'' I look away embarrassed much to his delight.

I hear him give a soft chuckle before speaking in his usual arrogant voice but this time I know he's just teasing and being playful, '' You hurt my feelings Anwyn Cresta after the pleasurable night we had together how rude of you.''

'' Finnick Odair,'' I say swatting him but I can't stop myself from letting out a light laugh at his words.

'' What? Don't you think the same about last night or is it just me?''

'' I think the same but just not the way you mean,'' I respond trying to buck him off but he's just too heavy.

He smiles at my attempt to get him off of me before he shows me pity and rolls off of me dramatically falling on the pillow next to me making me let out a laugh at the face he makes.

'' Alright seeing as my beautiful girl doesn't want the joys of all this I'll just go,'' he teases running his hand over his chest before standing up and grabbing his discarded shirt from the floor.

I shake my head smiling at his overly exaggerated display of stretching and cracking his back before slowly buttoning up his shirt looking at me from under his lashes.

'' You know you can ask me to stay at any second now whenever you want just say it,'' he says when he's all but done buttoning up his shirt.

'' Finnick go I need to get ready,''

'' I can help you with that,'' he drawls eyeing me up and down but I'm not offended I know he's just teasing me.

'' Maybe next time pretty boy now if you could…'' I motion to the door making him smile wider at me.

'' Alright I'm going no need to call me names just one more thing one for the road,'' he says before bending down to give me a passionate kiss making me sigh into his mouth happily.

'' Anwyn are you sure about this? About us?'' he asks looking at me like a scared child that doesn't want to turn away from something he loves for even a second.

'' Finnick there's nothing to think about this is right and I'm sorry it took me such a long time to realize how much I need you by my side.'' I give him one final kiss before telling him with my eyes to go.

'' I'll see at you breakfast,'' he says and with that he carefully makes his way out of my room while I blow him a kiss making him smile as he shuts the door and disappears from view.

I smile dazedly as I nestle against the pillow where only minutes ago he had laid on his distinct smell of ocean breeze still lingers on it making me sigh in utter bliss. I couldn't believe how happy I felt how happy he's made me and to think that only a day ago we were screaming at each other and now…what exactly was I to him? He called me his girl but…No Anwyn! Do not overthink this you can't just play with his feelings just take what he gives you it's not like you have much time left with him. My smile fades at that final thought with all my happiness had I really forgotten that in only three days I would be thrown into an arena where only one comes out? It had been so hard saying goodbye to my family how would I be able to say goodbye to Finnick? But I wouldn't have to say goodbye not if my plan followed through.

'' My plan!'' I shriek remembering about how I was playing with Onyx and Valentinus how would I tell Finnick? Would he understand that I was just acting that nothing was real? I had to tell him. I couldn't just keep this from him not now when he had been so honest with me.

'' Wakey! Wakey dearie!'' Vivia shrieks.

'' I'm up!'' I yell back quickly not wanting to hear the sound of her voice especially not now when I know what these disgusting people have done to Finnick. I wonder if she's paid just like the others do I want to know? Should I ask Finnick? I know I shouldn't ask about something so personal but I needed to know what Vivia meant to him even if I already knew the answer.

I decide to ask him later and to tell him about Onyx after all we would spend most of the day together preparing for tomorrow's interviews there would be enough time for us to talk. Standing from bed I begin to ready myself for the day noticing just how well rested I felt and of course I did after spending all night in his arms who wouldn't? I smile humming softly to myself as I dress for the day choosing to wear a simple light blue dress that fell a few inches below my thigh and had a beautiful strappy back. I match the dress with simple sand toned wedges adding a few inches to my height and making my legs look like they went on for miles. I let out a small laugh as I braid my hair knowing very well why I was dressing up or rather for whom.

I glance at my appearance happy with my choice of wardrobe before making my way out ready to face the day and even more ready to see Finnick. I didn't even know how I would be able to keep from smiling at him but I would have to try if he was right then what we were doing would put everyone we loved in danger. Taking a deep breath I compose myself making sure to keep my smile small and indifferent before making my way into the dining room where everyone but Finnick sat chatting quietly while they ate.

'' Oh there's our star!'' Vivia greets loudly standing up to give me a hug which I return awkwardly. '' And don't you just look stunning as usual!''

'' Thank you,'' I say giving her my Capitol smile before taking a seat greeting the others with a simple ''good morning'' noticing the prep teams were absent once again they were probably rushing to set up for tomorrow's show.

But I don't even have time to think about what they're doing right now when I'm bombarded by Vivia who unloads today's schedule on all of us. I listen silently while loading my plate with fruits and small pastries covered in grape and orange jams when we hear a whistle sound through the room. We all turn to see Finnick whistling loudly and happily as he walks into the dining room with an oversized smile adorning his face. Well seems like someone didn't get the memo about being discreet I think to myself.

'' Good morning,'' he says in a sing song voice making everyone look at him oddly.

'' Finny whatever has you so happy this morning?'' Vivia questions fluttering her spider leg eyelashes in an attempt to flirt making me all but ready to skewer her eyes with my fork.

'' Oh I just had a wonderful night,'' he answers before sitting next to me and whispering in my ear, '' hello again.''

'' Good morning,'' I try saying coolly but when I feel Mags and Lake looking at me I feel my face heating up luckily Viva makes herself somewhat useful.

'' Pray tell,'' she giggles stupidly.

'' What's to tell he probably just spent the night with another one of his well respected girlfriends though I really don't think they're that well respected if they want to spend any amount of time in his…_company_,'' Lake says throwing Finnick a fake smile.

And before anyone can say anything Finnick retaliates with his own smile before speaking sweetly to Lake.

'' You know I'm so happy not even you can ruin my mood but if you must know I did spend the night with a girl and unlike you I got what I wanted from her we spent the entire night…''

It's then that I choke on my orange juice just before he can finish his sentence knowing quite well that he was going to imply something completely different than what we actually had done.

'' Oh dearie are you alright?'' Vivia asks in concern while Finnick pats me gently on my back holding back his laughter.

'' Yes Anwyn are you alright,'' he purrs not caring that Lake is throwing daggers with his eyes.

'' I'm fine,'' I grumble giving him a glare which does no good because after I'm done choking he continues his little war with Lake.

'' Where was I? Oh that's right we were discussing my beautiful girl where shall I start perhaps how we kissed or maybe how she wouldn't get off of me at night nah you don't want to hear about that…oh wait how about how she said my name every time I...OW!'' He screeches as I step on him forcing him to shut up but this was Finnick Odair who apparently never shuts up.

'' Oh Finny are you alright? What happened?'' Vivia asks in concern practically fainting as she hears his overly exaggerated moan.

''I'm quite alright thank you Vivia I…Hey where are you going?'' He says turning to a now standing Lake.

Lake simply ignores him before looking down to Mags, '' If it's alright with you I want to get started with the whole interview prep stuff when you're done eating I'll just wait in my room,'' he finishes not waiting for Mags to reply as he walks off.

'' Wait don't you want to hear about the rest of my night!'' Finnick says around a mouthful of overly syrupy pancakes and I don't know whether to smack him or laugh at his childlike display.

Smacking him wins because when I see Lake freeze in mid step turning to give him a glare before turning to me with a broken look as if though I had hurt him in the worst way possible I'm ready to smack the last of Finnick's brain cells out of his head.

'' So how did you sleep Anwyn,'' Finnick purrs making me look away from Lake's retreating form and to him. I immediately regret looking at him because when I look into his happy green eyes I feel every bit of anger slipping away.

'' I could have slept better I was actually quite uncomfortable,'' I reply arching my brow and to my displeasure his smile never waivers it only gets bigger.

'' Oh really and why was that?'' he asks completely ignoring Mags and Vivia his teasing eyes are only on me.

'' Yes dearie why was that?'' Vivia pipes in not wanting to be ignored any longer.

'' I don't know I just felt smothered and then I kept on hearing someone snore rather loudly it sounded like some wild animal I just couldn't get any rest,'' I say never taking my eyes off of Finnick giving him my own little smirk.

He laughs softly behind his coffee mug his eyes dancing with humor and delight at our little banter that makes him look like the nineteen year old he's not allowed to be. That thought breaks my heart because who could be so evil to torture this boy and force him to do such filthy things against his will? But I know the answer the only person possible of such evil is our dear president the man that only cares for power and not the suffering of those powerless against him.

'' I honestly don't know what we should do with that boy Lake has been so rude to you Finny darling I just don't understand how anyone could be so rude to you,'' Vivia says taking me away from my thoughts with her overly dramatic voice.

'' Oh it's fine Vivia don't worry Lake just can't stand me and I completely understand I mean if he had what I had I'd hate him too,'' Finnick answers turning to give Mags a huge smile when he feels her eyes on him questioningly most likely never have seen this side of Finnick in years maybe even never. She turns from him to look at me her wise green eyes putting the pieces together easily before giving us such a loving and warm smile I can't help but return shyly not being able to hide my happiness.

'' Well now I'm completely confused!'' Vivia shouts rubbing her temples probably in pain from all the thinking.

'' It's alright Vivia it's my little secret,'' he purrs never taking his eyes off of me and Vivia must be really stupid or just plain oblivious because she just stares at us confused before turning back to her food.

'' No one tells me anything,'' she huffs cutting through her berry filled crepes a little too roughly.

'' Well if you will all excuse me I need to go with Lake he's been waiting for a while now,'' Mags says trying to stand from her seat with great difficulty.

'' Mags let me help,'' Finnick says ready to stand and help her.

'' No, no you just finish eating it's just these old bones they get rusty in the mornings don't worry about me,'' she says waiving him off before slowly walking off using the chairs as support.

'' That poor dear she get worse every year I think it's quite rude that the other ladies won't take her place as mentor,'' Vivia says once Mags is out of earshot.

'' The other female victors aren't very stable and besides Mags has been doing this for years and it's usually her that helps bring back a victor,'' Finnick shrugs but I can tell he didn't like how she implied the other females victors were cruel as to not volunteer to take Mags place.

'' That's quite true Mags just has a way of mentoring and well let's be honest the other girls are quite…odd but also rude very rude especially that Pearl she has no kind bone in her body. Oh and then there's Oceana she's…'' Vivia cuts off twirling her fork next to her ear in a loop like motion but it's not the right thing to do in front of a fellow victor especially not one that was raised by them.

'' Oceana isn't crazy and you don't know Pearl you don't know any of them so please Vivia keep your comments to yourself,'' Finnick says trying to appear calm but the ways he grips his fork until his knuckles turn white gives him away and it takes every bit of will power I had in me not to take his hand in mine.

How could Vivia be so insensitive to say something like that? Did she not see that this boy was just as broken and damaged as the other victors back home? I didn't know much about the other victors they usually kept to themselves only coming out on occasion but the little I've see I know they aren't strange or crazy they're just fragile. And it's these capitol people that have broken them.

'' Well I was only being honest,'' she says trying to defend herself, '' but no matter and besides in a month's tops I just know District 4 will have the female victor it needs.''

Why can't she just shut up already? What if Lake had heard her say that?

'' Well now if you will excuse me I have things to do before my session with Lake,'' she says dabbing her lips before standing up. '' Oh by the way Anwyn dearie I heard from a reliable source that you managed to catch the eye of Seneca Crane now he is a very good connection to have.''

I look at her not knowing who she was talking about or why she couldn't just simply leave without talking.

'' Who?'' I ask.

'' Seneca Crane dearie the soon-to-be head gamemaker once Lucius retires and I hear it's going to be this year. He's also Panem's most handsome bachelor and very very wealthy he's practically President Snow's adopted son,'' Vivia answers dazedly as if she wouldn't mind marrying this Seneca Crane.

Is she talking about the young gamemaker that I had winked at? It must be him he did seem more important than the others even a bit more important than the head gamemaker himself.

'' Now if I were you I'd sweep him up in a jiffy and you'll get the chance once you win,'' she says pointing a blue claw like nail at me before finally walking off.

Oh Vivia you're lucky there isn't a trident anywhere near because if there were one you'd be impaled by it and it would all be thanks to our handsome Finnick Odair. Once she's out of eye sight and most likely out of ear shot Finnick turns to look at me the anger fading from his eyes as he gazes down at me.

'' Hi,'' I whisper happy to finally be left alone with him.

'' Hi to you too,'' he replies giving me the dimpled smile I had come to adore. '' Sooo_ Seneca Crane_ shall we add him to your ever growing list of admirers?''

'' He just fell for the loud laughing bimbo if that's the type of girl he likes then he might have a better chance with Vivia I'm sure she'd roll over for him.''

He lets out a laugh but it's not like the ones he's been giving this morning those were carefree and young this laugh seemed forced as if he was thinking about something else.

'' Finnick what's wrong is it what Vivia said? I can explain…''

'' No, no it's fine how about we get started with the interview prep,'' he says quickly changing the subject. But why do I feel like there's more?

'' You haven't finished your breakfast,'' I pointed out stupidly lost in my thoughts.

He looks down at his pancakes before scooping them up and stuffing them all in his mouth making me laugh at the return of his playfulness.

'' Finnick you're going to choke!'' I laugh at his stuffed cheeks.

He holds up his index finger telling me to wait a second as he chugs down a glass of orange juice before standing up and offering me his hand.

'' That was very sexy,'' I say referring to his pancake display.

He lets out a howling laugh that I can't help but smile at knowing that I was the one making him laugh like this.

'' Well thank you I'm glad you were impressed,'' he says leading me towards the bedroom hall.

'' I wouldn't exactly say I'm impressed though you have a talent there Mr. Odair,'' I tease feeling at ease by his side when I notice we had just passed my bedroom and were heading to his.

'' You don't mind do you?'' He asks when he sees that I've noticed where we were going.

'' No it's fine,'' I answer more confident than I expected even though it would be the first time I would be in his room during the day since our first kiss.

I follow him quietly trying not to overthink anything but I suddenly remember something I was supposed to do when we pass what I know was Lake's bedroom.

'' I'm mad at you by the way,'' I tell him once we're at his door.

'' What! Why?'' He asks horrified not knowing what he did wrong.

'' What you said to Lake it was rude and a lie,''

'' No I said the truth it was him who thought something differently,''

'' Because you _implied_ that we did it,''

'' Okay fine so maybe I enhanced the truth but he started first and he even sort of offended you,''

'' Finnick it doesn't matter who started first you should have been the adult and not continued this little war you have with him which by the way I think is ridiculous!''

'' Hey the only one to blame for our little war as you call it is you,''

'' Me!'' I whisper yell looking at him shocked.

'' Yes you.'' He says opening the door to let me in and I do giving him a little huff as I walk passed him.

'' Finnick I'm not an object that can be fought over I'm…'' I don't finish talking because the moment I hear the door close behind him I feel him take me by the arm and turn me to face him silencing me with a passionate kiss.

''Mmm…'' I moan into his mouth running my hands over his muscled chest and up to his neck where I leave them.

And like always his kisses…our kisses erase anything that runs through my mind consuming me with only thoughts of him and perfect we fit together. But all too soon the kiss comes to an end when he pools away leaving me breathless.

'' Let's not talk about Lake not right now please,'' he pleads running his fingers over my braid, '' you look beautiful I mean you always do but I mean…''

I let out a laugh and peck him on his lips quietening him up. '' Thank you I think you're handsome too,'' I say once I pull away.

He smiles down at me with so much adoration in his eyes I can't believe I never saw how deep his feelings ran. Was I really that blind or did I just not want to believe that the supposed sex symbol of Panem wanted more from me than a good roll in the sheets? But would he adore me after he found out about my plan? About Onyx? Tell him now Anwyn you can't wait forever!

'' So you aren't mad at me anymore?'' He asks.

'' No just try to ignore Lake or be somewhat nice please you have to understand that he's entering this arena also he doesn't need to be fighting with you over something stupid.''

''You aren't stupid,'' he tries joking but shuts up when he sees my pursed lips and he slumps his shoulders because he knows he doesn't have a chance against me on this. '' Okay I'll try to be nice but I don't promise anything because you can't ask me to just let him attack me and stand aside while he does it.''

'' That's all I ask Finnick,'' I say standing on my toes to kiss his cheek making him smile.

'' I'm only doing this for you if it were up to me I'd strangle him,''

'' Well thank you either way and now that we're done talking about Lake there's something I have to tell you…''

'' What is it?'' He asks worry flashing over his face.

'' The day you asked me how training had gone and if I had gotten in with the careers I might have not told you everything but I need to tell you now before you see and think something that's not true.''

''Tell me,'' he says leading me to sit on his bed.

'' Okay here goes nothing,'' I say more to myself than to him before telling him about Onyx and how he had practically claimed me as his and now he probably thinks I'm his girlfriend but in return he's promised to protect me and help me win or at the most take me to the final eight. Once I finish with the Onyx part of my story I look up from my hands and up to him wanting to see his expression but all I see is a cold and blank expression but it's his silence that I hate more.

'' Please say something, you have to understand that this was before there was an us Onyx means nothing to me well that's a lie he means a chance of surviving pass the first few days.'' I beg him to understand but he just looks away as if he was thinking and I feel tears spring into my eyes at the coldness he's displaying.

'' Finnick please don't ignore me not now that we're together. It's you I want not him or Seneca Crane not even Lake none of them are even close to you or the way I feel about you if you want I'll leave the careers and do this on my own.''

'' No you can't do that I would never ask you to do that it's just I guess Gloss wasn't just being his usual annoying self…'' he says absentminded.

'' Gloss? I don't understand,'' I say not knowing why he was mentioning the district 1 mentor.

'' He sort of mentioned you and his kid had hit it off and how he wouldn't stop talking about you but I just thought Gloss was trying to get me mad or something…''

''I didn't hit it off with him I'm just using Onyx and its working he fell into my trap the other careers won't go against his word! Finnick like I believed you I need you to believe me.''

I know it's wrong for me to use what he told me against him but it was the only thing that came to mind and luckily it works because I see his shoulders fall as if a weight had been lifted off of them.

'' I believe you I just…I'm afraid to lose you when I finally have you in my arms.''

His words break my heart because he looks so much like a child that became an orphan and loss his childhood and so many other things that he's now afraid to lose me.

'' Finnick that won't happen please get it through that thick skull I'm yours and I'll take whatever you give me because I'm tired of fighting what I feel for you.''

'' My thick skull? Now that Ms. Cresta is quite rude and then you say I snore now we can't have that now can we?'' He jokes but I don't let him kiss me because I haven't told him everything just yet.

'' Wait Finnick there's more,''

'' More?''

'' The district 2 male Valentinus he thinks I like hime,'' I mumble.

'' Why would he think that?''

'' I sort of told him I wanted him and not Onyx and if we worked together we could take down Onyx together,'' I say quickly.

He stares at me for a long minute his face turning from his tan shade to almost a blazing and angry red when he finally stands up running his hand through his hair which I now see as a tick he has.

'' Anwyn what are you thinking! Do you know what will happen if they find out you're playing with them?''

'' They won't…

'' They won't what? They won't notice that you're actually betraying them instead of being in love with them? Anwyn they're going to kill you…''

'' Now you sound like Lake,'' I groan walking up to him.

'' Lake! He knows about this stupid plan?''

I nod my head feeling a little intimidated by his anger.

'' And he didn't try to stop you!?''

'' He did but I told him I didn't need his help and that I had everything under control,'' I whisper withering under his glare.

'' You have everything under control,'' he repeats his gaze burning a hole in my face.

'' Yes I know what I'm doing and besides if things don't go the way I want them to go I can always run off and do this on my own. I think you're forgetting I received an eleven in training which means I can surely fight for my life.''

'' You think you can face off against the careers not just any careers but the males one which probably want to skin you alive because of how you lied to them,''

'' I can take them I know I can and besides you took out the careers by yourself in your games,'' I try fighting my cause using him again.

'' That was different!''

'' How was that different!''

'' Because I didn't have two boyfriends trying to kill me after they found out I was cheating on them!''

'' They aren't my boyfriends and when they find out that I'm playing them it'll be too late I'll have slit their throats by then.''

'' How do you know that? What if they slit yours first?

'' You're right I don't know! I don't know if I'll even make it pass the first week or if I'll ever see my family again or my home…or you…I don't know,'' I whisper losing my anger and feeling sadness and melancholy taking over. '' All I know is that right now I need you to tell me my plan is going to work and in no time I'll be on a train heading home.''

I don't say anything else because soon I'm pressed against a hard chest and being held so tenderly that I feel like a small child the child that I actually am because I'm only fifteen and I should be thinking about how I might die in a few days.

'' I'm sorry I didn't mean to shout Anwyn, I'm just so afraid to lose you I can't… I won't think of any other possibility than you coming back home with me safe and sound.''

I sniffle against his shoulder fighting the tears back only wanting to feel happy that I was in his arms and how I felt so protected in them but first I needed to ask him one last thing that was crucial for me to hear.

'' Do you trust me?'' I ask just like he had on our arrival to the Capitol.

I feel him sighing against my cheek and a minute later I hear his deep voice telling me what I wanted to hear the only words that can calm me even if they were a lie.

'' I trust you,'' he says softly kissing the top of my head and I can't help but hug him tighter placing my own small kiss on his strong chest.

'' Now we should really get on with the prepping stuff unless you want to throw more stuff my way,'' he says releasing me gently trying to ease any tension that was leftover.

'' No there's nothing else,'' I smile.

'' Good because I don't think I can handle more now just sit wherever you'd like and we can get started,''

'' Okay,'' I say walking back to his bed ready to sit down when I spot a journal type thing laying open next to the many pillows.

'' What's this?'' I ask grabbing the journal.

'' Oh that's nothing just doodles…I sometimes write when I can't sleep,'' he says trying to take the journal back but I easily slip out of his reach now interested in why he doesn't want me seeing this.

I dodge his hold giggling every time he tries taking the journal from me quickly reading out loud from the page that was left open.

_When I am without her, the sun doesn't shine as brightly.__  
__When I am without her, the clouds are dark and foreboding.__  
__When I am without her, the birds don't sing as sweetly__._

It's a poem a beautifully written poem. I look up at him to see his cheeks slightly pink with embarrassment but he doesn't say anything as I turn back to another page reading another poem.

_just a glance, a look and there you were,  
for me to have, to choose, to care  
for life is nothing with no dare.  
it's boring when it's all care,  
wasn't sure you'd look my way  
for ..._

Page after page there are poems all about love, beauty, and pain all beautifully written but it's the last one that makes me know they were all about me.

_True beauty is in the way she laughs  
True beauty is in her eyes  
True beauty is how she acts  
True beauty is inside  
True beauty is unseen  
True beauty is only felt  
True beauty is not mean  
True beauty is herself  
True beauty can't be cruel  
True beauty is bare  
True beauty within you  
True beauty is always there  
True Beauty can't be covered with makeup  
True beauty means true love  
True beauty can't be baked up  
True beauty is the flight of a dove  
True beauty has no flaws  
For True beauty is all that matters after all_

_Anwyn is the definition of true beauty and we only stand to admire her…_

I look up from the journal as I read the last line and towards him who stands just staring at me waiting for my response.

'' These are all about me aren't they?'' I ask in wonder surprised by the beauty of his written words.

'' Yes,'' he says shyly.

'' They're beautiful. You're a wonderful poet,'' I say softly handing him back his journal.

'' It's my talent. The Capitol said I needed one after I won and well I had always been good at making up silly things like these,'' he says trying to appear uncaring.

'' I don't think they're silly,'' I say honestly, '' but I'm surprised that you could make poetry using me…''

'' Why wouldn't I be able to? You're a beautiful muse…my muse.''

I smile shyly up at him before kissing him gently feeling him smile into our kiss before I pull away sitting on his bed.

'' So shall we start _Mr. Poet_?'' I purr charmingly enjoying how his eyes glaze over before he walks slowing towards me.

_A mermaid sings and her sailor writes poetry now can anyone find a better match? Because in the end music and poetry can be one in the same, they're just as beautiful and all too sad and sweet when they speak of love and loss._

**Sorry for the late update fanfic has been giving me a hard time letting me upload but as I promised here's another chapter and this is by far my favorite it's just so sweet! Enjoy and please review!**


	14. Chapter 14

**I own nothing. Enjoy!**

Finnick sits quietly observing me every once in a while running his hand over his chin as if he were debating something with himself while I just sit on his bed waiting patiently for him to finally speak. I cross and uncross my legs feeling shy under his gaze but he seems oblivious to it as he continues to stare me down leaning his elbows on his knees to get a closer look at me when he finally and thankfully starts speaking.

'' We're going to lay off the whole sexy mermaid thing you have going on,'' he says looking more serious than he's been all day taking me by surprise.

'' Why? I thought everyone liked the mermaid angle?''

'' Oh they do _everyone_ loves your mermaid act but I think sexy isn't the right angle for you,''

'' Why? Am I not sexy enough?'' I question teasingly.

'' What no! I mean of course you're sexy…I mean…yes you…''

'' So what angle should I take on now?'' I say taking pity on him and changing the subject before he turns into a living tomato.

'' You can still play around with being a mermaid we can't change that now especially not so close into this but I just think you should turn the attention away from your looks at least try to,'' he tries explaining but I can't help but feel that there's a bigger reason behind this change of strategy something he's not telling me.

'' Finnick is there something you aren't telling me?''

'' What? No!'' He says defending himself but I can tell there's more from how he can't meet my eye and how he combs his hand through his hair tugging at it impatiently.

'' I thought we were going to be honest with each other. Why do I feel like you aren't being honest?'' I whisper begging with my eyes for him to tell me the truth whatever it was.

I see his eyes debating whether to tell me whatever was bothering him and when he finally looks up at me I can tell he's decided to tell me what was bothering him so much.

'' Anwyn you're beautiful a little too beautiful and the Capitol people see that they _only_ see that and…and that's not such a good thing I don't want them to see you or talk the way they do about you like they do now.''

I never take my eyes off of him as he speaks his words coming out forced and strained even angry as if he couldn't make himself utter the words as if speaking them made them more real. It didn't take me even a minute to understand what he was saying what he was implying…

'' What are they saying?'' I whisper wanting and not wanting to know what these people were saying about me.

'' Anwyn please let's just leave it I don't want to talk about it.''

'' But don't I have a right to know?'' I ask.

''Please just let it go!'' He yells standing up angrily from his chair and walking off to the oversized window looking away from me.

I wanted to tell him that I couldn't just let it go that I deserved to know but I knew what he was thinking, what he was feeling. I rise from the bed making my way towards him coming to stand behind him. I don't say anything as I wrap my arms around his waist resting my chin on his shoulder trying to comfort him and luckily it works as I feel his body loose the tension that was flowing through him.

'' I didn't mean to yell it's just it isn't exactly easy to sit through people talking about the girl you like as if she were a fish ready to be cooked and served.'' I feel him

He turns around without pulling away from my hold before hugging me tight against his body in a way that takes my breath away. We don't say anything as we just stand there holding each other pushing away the implied words far from our minds because as long as we held each other we could pretend that what these Capitol people and the others were saying meant nothing. We could pretend that they were just speaking and they could never act on their words but I knew that there was a promise of a horrifying future in the words Finnick didn't bring himself to say.

I smile as I feel him placing a soft kiss on the top of my head pulling away soon after from our embrace.

'' Come on we need to get started,'' he says pulling me back towards the bed making me sit before sitting back in his discarded chair in front of the bed.

'' So now for part one of our plan I want you to be sweet compliment the people and the Capitol itself they'll love that. Be coy and secretive act like you would rather hear more about them and say how you finally feel like you belong…that you belong here with them that these are the people that understand you. Towards the end of the interview Caesar will most likely ask about your score and how you got it all I want you to do is say something witty and nothing else.''

I nod my head listening to every word making sure not to miss a single thing he says to me even storing it in my head not wanting to forget even one thing.

'' Got it?'' He asks not once taking his eyes away from me.

'' Be sweet, coy, and secretive yeah I got it,'' I say listing off what he said just seconds ago.

'' Good, now onto the interview practice I know I don't have to tell you this but still, the chariot parade was for the Capitol people to get a first glimpse of who catches the eye the most which of course you did now the scoring session was to find the strongest but we all know it's just a number and things can change in the arena but the interview is a way for all of us to see the ''real'' you. This interview is where sponsors finalize their decisions on who they really like it's make it or break it if you act too arrogant they won't like that but if you don't make them beg for more it means you're pretty much on you own in the arena. Now I know you probably know people are already sponsoring you but like I said things can change especially now, say the wrong thing and a pretty face won't be enough for them to love you.''

I sit surely looking at him like a gaping fool surprised by his serious tone and how he sounded so much older than he actually was.

'' Wow I've had that speech saved up for years usually I don't get passed how I want them to act when they're calling me a stupid kid this feels good the whole mentor thing I'm feeling it.'' He continues on like this for a few minutes surprised by his little speech before I giggle and quiet him down.

'' Finnick?''

'' I mean this feels really good…''

''Finnick?''

'' I feel like Mags I…''

''Finnick!'' I shout finally silencing him.

'' Sorry I just…this is a first for me,'' he says laughing awkwardly.

'' it's okay and don't worry I won't call you a stupid kid I stopped listening when you opened your mouth,'' I tease.

'' Sorry what did you say? I was too busy looking at your breasts,'' he says pretending to shake himself awake.

I know he's saying this to make me blush like usual when anyone talks about my body but for once I retaliate much differently taking us both by surprise.

'' You could be looking at worst things,'' I purr sounding almost like him.

He arches a brow before glancing down at my breasts and it takes every part of my ego to not cross my arms and cover them.

'' True,'' he says finally looking back at me, '' you know if it weren't for the blush I'd say you did a pretty good job imitating me though I'd be talking about something _thick, long, _and_ it's attached to me_ would you like to touch it?''

I stare at him open mouthed not knowing what to say just knowing that by now I looked like a tomato. He looks at me as if he hadn't just said what he had said before his dimpled smile makes its way on full blast followed by a deep laugh.

'' You should see your face,'' he says trying to fight off his laughter, '' I was talking about my hair! Anwyn what did you think I was talking about?''

'' I…I… oh shut up,'' I say throwing a pillow at his face which he neatly catches before it meets its destination.

'' That could have bruised my face!'' He says in mock shock.

I roll my eyes at him but I can't fight the stupid grin that makes its way on my face.

'' If your face isn't bruised and you're done undressing me with your eyes can we maybe get started with this?''

'' Of course unless you'd still like to touch my _thick, long_…''

'' Finnick!''

'' Okay, okay no need to shout,'' he laughs before stroking his hair in an exaggerated fashion, '' it's okay she doesn't know what she's missing.''

'' did you really just talk to your hair?''

'' hey don't judge I'll have you know I'm very fond of these bronze locks,''

I scoff playfully shaking my head in mock horror.

'' can we start like I don't know…NOW?''

'' Fine just let me get into my zone,'' he says closing his eyes and waving his hands in front of his face taking in exaggerate gulps of air before finally opening his eyes.

'' Okay I'm ready. Now what I'm going to do is ask you a series of questions your job is to answer them the way you think the Capitol people will want you to answer…''

'' So I shouldn't be honest?''

'' In certain questions you can be but to a certain extent, Anwyn you need to realize that honesty and Capitol don't go together keep that in mind,''

I nod my head knowing he was right honesty would only get me so far with these people and besides I wasn't exactly being honest by playing this bimbo that only loved her reflection.

'' Now that that's clear we can get started remember Caesar will ask you anything and everything but it's you that chooses to respond you can easily turn the question around to him or simply act coy,''

'' Alright now just relax take a deep breath and in 1…2…3…Hello Hello Hello welcome to another amazing year of…why are you laughing?''

I tried keeping my laughter in but I just couldn't help it his impersonation was just too funny for me not to laugh.

'' I'm sorry I didn't mean to laugh,'' I say trying to hold back another fit of laughter.

'' Well I think my impersonation of Flickerman is rather impressive thank you very much now if you're finished laughing at me let's try this again,''

'' I'm done,''

'' Good. Hello Hello Hello welcome to another year of Hunger Games…ANWYN STOP LAUGHING!''

'' Sorry,'' I say covering my mouth.

'' Okay you know what I'm just going to start with the questions because I don't think we'll be able to get passed the intro,''

'' Sorry,'' I say again but it comes out more like a giggle to which he sends me a small glare before giving me an exasperated smile.

'' Alright let's try this again without the laughing,'' he says sending me a mock glare, '' Now she's beautiful, gorgeous, and every other word you want to throw at her she's definitely the bounty of the sea please help me welcome AAAANNNWWYYNN CRREESSTTAA!''

'' _Bounty of the sea_? Really Finnick?'' I ask arching a brow.

'' Hey I'm Caesar Flickerman when you're mentoring next time and get to be Caesar Flickerman you can say anything you want but right now it's my time so I get to say what I want and he'll most likely say this to you anyway so shut it,''

I hold up my hands in surrender but I can't help but smile at what he just said about how when I was a mentor next time…he didn't say if I'm a mentor next time in his mind I'm already a victor there was no other option.

'' Anwyn are you listening to me? Come on pay attention,'' he says pulling me away from my thoughts, '' alright take three get ready to talk and please don't interrupt.''

'' My! Can I just say Anwyn you are a vision and here we thought Finnick Odair was the best we could get from your district am I right or am I right?'' He asks turning to his left pretending to face an invincible audience before turning to me a few seconds after.

'' Now tell me beautiful how are you enjoying the Capitol anything you hate? Anything you love? Tell me Tell me!''

He waves his hand forward giving me my cue to start talking.

'' Well I can't tell you what I hate Caesar honestly there's nothing to hate here but I can tell you what I absolutely love and that's the people,'' I say turning to Finnick's imaginary audience, '' I just can't believe how welcoming and loving you all are I can't imagine better people.''

I stop speaking when I hear soft applause turning to face a smiling Finnick I know I've answered well.

'' Good job that was Finnick Odair worthy but don't let that get to your head let's go again,''

Question after question is thrown at me and to each I give an answer never missing a beat making sure to respond the way the Capitol people will want me to respond.

'' Last question,'' Finnick says finally promising a break from his questionnaire, '' Let's talk Finnick Odair shall we Anwyn?''

'' What about _Finnick Odair_?'' I ask sweetly making sure to throw the question back at him.

'' Well I hear he's your mentor and I think we all want to know how it feels to be the first female tribute mentored by him so tell me how was one on one mentoring with him going?'' He purrs lifting his brows suggestively.

'' I'm quite happy with him as my mentor…''

'' Honey we'd all be happy if he were our mentor too,'' Finnick interrupts trying to make me break under the question.

I let out a girlish giggle pushing his arm softly, '' Now Caesar I know what you want from me and all I can honestly say is that we understand each other I couldn't have asked for a better mentor.''

'' Well now that's the first time I hear someone actually calling Finnick Odair a good mentor you do know he hasn't brought back home a victor yet?''

'' Well that's because he was waiting for me,'' I say smoothly

'' Yes, yes he was,'' Finnick says breaking away from his impersonation, '' and what do you think about Finnick Odair?''

I look at him for a moment not knowing whether to respond as if this was part of the interview or if this was really him asking what I thought about him. I decide to answer honestly done with all these questions and answering the way they want and not the way I want to answer.

'' I used to think nothing of him but that was a lie because the moment I got on that train I couldn't stop thinking about him, at first I thought he was vain and arrogant and then I…''

'' Then what?'' he asks coming to sit next to me on his bed.

'' And then I saw how wrong I was how stupid and childish I was being because I know I couldn't have fallen for a better man. There's more behind the pretty face I see a broken, lonely, and used boy that needs care and love to smile again. I see a kind and loving soul…''

I'm not able to finish whatever I was going to say and truthfully I don't remember what I was going to say because like usual his lips erase any other thought but how amazing we are together. He doesn't pull away like I thought he would all he does is gently push me down to lie on the bed signaling the end of our prep time and I was all but happy to oblige.

We kiss and kiss not once pulling away until I feel my lungs on fire trying to fight for air and before I can even try to push him away he moves his lips from mine giving me a chance to catch my breath. His lips don't move away from me though it seems I was the only one that needed air because instead of catching his own breath he moves to my neck doing sinful things to it. I try catching my breath but it only gets worse as I feel my chest rising and falling in an uneven pattern.

'' Finnick,'' I sigh as I feel his tongue making a path down my neck to the tender skin between my neck and shoulder.

I close my eyes feeling weak against his skilled lips only ever so often sighing and fighting to get my breathing into a steady rhythm when I feel his hands begin to wander. I try following their movements at first they were innocent gently running down my sides but I quickly open my eyes when I feel a hand pushing up my dress and taking hold around my thigh. But it's when I feel his fingers make contact with the edge of my lacy underwear that I rapidly grab his hand stopping him from going any further.

'' No,'' I say breathlessly moving to sit up.

'' I'm sorry I didn't…I'm sorry,'' I hear him say behind me while I push my dress back over my legs completely embarrassed that he almost touched me…there.

'' Anwyn please don't go I was stupid I shouldn't have…''

'' No its fine I just…I've never…'' I look away from him in embarrassment not being able to finish my sentence but it was obvious what I was trying to say.

'' Hey it's okay don't be embarrassed,'' he says pulling me back into his arms, '' I shouldn't have touched you like that it's just…it's hard controlling myself around you.''

I blush even more at his words hiding my face in between his shoulder and neck wanting to end this little conversation. I feel him kissing the top of my head softly before pulling me back so he could look down at me once more a smile already in place assuring me nothing was wrong.

'' For the first time I actually want to be with a girl and she says no,'' he says placing a gentle kiss on my lips humor etched around his words.

'' I'm sorry,'' I whisper looking down at my dress.

'' Why are you apologizing? You did nothing wrong,'' he says taking my face in his hands forcing my eyes to meet his. '' Anwyn if you had allowed me to continue…if you had said yes then you wouldn't have been the girl I fell for.''

'' Thank you,'' I say placing a soft kiss on his lips.

'' What for?''

'' For understanding, for caring about how I feel, for making me feel special,'' I answer taking his hands in my own, '' for being you…the real you.''

'' Don't think me so great if you hadn't said no we'd be giving mentoring a whole new definition,'' he jokes trying to hide the small blush he had gotten from my words.

'' While I'm sure our definition would have been unforgettable had I said yes I just don't feel ready_ right now_,'' I say pecking the corner of his mouth feeling his lip lift in a small smile before I pull away.

'' _Right now_?'' He repeats as if testing the words.

'' Right now,'' I say again watching his face as my favorite smile makes another appearance.

'' So _maybe, possibly, one day_ you would be willing as in we would maybe do it?'' He asks staring me down.

'' One day yes but right now I just don't think it's the right time or place,'' I say running my fingers through his wavy hair enjoying the feel of it under my touch.

'' Okay,'' he says nodding his head as if we had just finished a negotiation, '' but in the meantime we can still kiss right?''

'' Yes,'' I say laughing softly before I remember something he had said, '' Finnick have you ever been with someone you cared about?''

'' No,'' he answers after a moment.

'' Not even the first time?'' I ask regretting asking that question the moment I see his eyes glaze over in pain as if reliving that exact moment.

'' My first time wasn't exactly what I expected,'' he says bitterly looking away from me.

'' it was with a client wasn't it,'' I state rather than question.

'' I don't want to talk about it Anwyn, how about we just kiss some more?'' He says trying to pull me down on the bed but I don't give into his expertise.

'' Finnick you can't just use kissing to change the subject,''

'' well usually I'd use a different part of my body to change the subject but I'm pretty sure if I tried that with you you'd unman me,'' he says laughing but when he sees that I'm not even letting out a single giggle he stops and just sighs.

'' Anwyn this isn't something I want to talk about especially not with you.''

'' Why? I just want to know you better…''

'' And I don't want you to know that Finnick not the Capitol Finnick,''

'' But…''

'' Anwyn for once since I became a victor I feel that I have something pure and I'm scared if I tell you everything if I even stand to close I'll taint you with my filth,''

'' Now that's not true you aren't filthy and I'm sad that you feel that way because I don't,'' I say unclenching his fist and taking his hand in mine.

'' How can you say I'm not filthy? You don't know the things I've done…''

'' What you've been forced to do,'' I say cutting him off, '' I can't say that deep down I don't feel jealous of those people and what you do with them but I hate them for what they do you more. I'm sorry if I brought back memories that you wanted to erase but you need to know that I want to know every part of you even the worst parts.''

'' I want to be honest with you but there are some things I just…I just don't want to relive please let it go,''

'' Okay Fin,'' I say wrapping my arms around him wanting to erase all his demons.

'' What did you call me?'' He asks pulling away slightly.

'' Fin. I like it don't you?'' I ask looking up at him sweetly.

'' My parents used to call me that,''

Oh great Anwyn look what you did now! Why can't I just shut up for once when it came to this boy?

'' I'm sorry…''

'' No it's fine it's just I haven't been called that in years, it brings back memories…good memories.''

I hug him tighter feeling the pain he feels as he speaks about his deceased parents and I refrain from asking a question that no one dared to ask back home: was it really an accident that killed Mr. and Mrs. Odair?

'' So if I let you call me Fin what can I call you?'' He asks laying us both down against the feather soft pillows.

I shrug not really caring only enjoying the feel of his hand running up and down my back and the way my skin began to tingle under his touch.

'' How about…sugar?'' He asks laughing when I nip at his shoulder.

'' Fine no sugar…what about cupcake? Okay don't look at me like that,'' he says when I glare at him.

'' I guess I'll just call you mermaid like the others how boring,'' he pouts dramatically.

'' You can call me Ann or Annie most people do,'' I say closing my eyes feeling ready for a nap.

'' I thought I wasn't allowed to call you Annie?'' He asks remembering our little fight, had it really only been a day ago since that?

'' I was being a brat,'' I mumble snuggling closer to his body.

'' yeah you were a brat,'' he laughs, '' and I was an ass.''

'' We both were but we made it there in the end,'' I say opening my eyes to look up at him.

'' Yeah we did, didn't we?'' He says placing a kiss on my forehead, '' I think I'll call you Annie, my Annie.''

'' Your Annie,'' I say sleepily.

'' You don't know how long I've waited for you to be mine.''

I feel myself smiling softly as I hear those words not caring whether I had dreamt them up or if he really had said them because at the moment all I cared about was the way he hugged me closer and how his head came to rest on top of mine. I only cared about how our hands never let go of each other even in slumber as if they were never meant to be separated. I think I always knew deep down I was his Annie and that's all I care about.

_A mermaid wishes to be free it's her way of living; she knows nothing else but freedom. She wishes to never belong to anyone but something always changes the sea always brings something different and when it brings love she thinks that maybe belonging to someone isn't so awful after all. Because as long as she's __**his**__ and as long as he's __**hers **__she's willing to belong to someone, because love is freedom and a mermaid can't live without freedom._

**Somewhat short chapter sorry guys but next will be the interviews and soon followed by the games and unfortunately a little bit of Onyx and Annie. Thanks guys once again for all the support I really wasn't expecting all this love I hope like always you review and continue reading! Thank you guys!**


End file.
